


You and I Collide

by idratherhaveyou



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: And it's fine, Apartment AU, Dad!Shiro, Firsts, Flirting, Fluff and Angst, I Don't Even Know, I don't know what I'm doing, Keith and Lance fall in love so, M/M, Minor Allura/Shiro (Voltron), Modern AU, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-21
Updated: 2017-07-03
Packaged: 2018-10-22 02:00:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 72,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10687455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idratherhaveyou/pseuds/idratherhaveyou
Summary: Lance likes to sing in the shower.Keith lives in the apartment next door and the walls are not very thick.  And you can bet when Lance wakes him up at 7:30 in the morning, Keith has something to say about it.





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! *waves*  
> I don't know what I'm doing, I don't even know why I did this or why I'm going to continue to do this...but I'm definitely blaming you, Camille.  
> Essentially, I'm new to the Voltron fandom, I've read a fuckton of fic, and Keith and Lance don't want to go away. So here I am.  
> Anywayyyy...I hope this is an alright thing. If you like it, let me know  
> Enjoy!

“Hakuna Matata!What a wonderful phrase.Hakuna Matata!Ain’t no passing craze.”

Groaning, Keith patted around for his phone, finding it next to his left ear, and checked the time.7:21.Today was the day, the day he was finally going to crack and actually murder his next door neighbor.Singing in the shower was one thing.Singing at 7:21 in the morning was another thing entirely.Both were irritating, one induced homicide.

Pounding his fist hard against the wall that he wished was thicker, Keith waited to see if the singing would stop. 

“…Why, when he was a young warthog.When I was a young warthog!”

If Keith could hear him singing, then his neighbor sure as hell could hear him pounding on the wall.Stumbling out of bed, Keith pulled on a pair of black jeans, and stomped out of his room.Shiro and Allura were in the living room, sitting at the small kitchen table, and eating bowls of cereal, reading the newspaper.Sparing them a glance, just so he could roll his eyes at their disgusting domestic antics, Keith made for the door of the apartment.  
“Keith,” Shiro called.“Where are you going?”

“To kill our neighbor.”

“It’s 7:30 in the morning.Maybe you should wait until…”

“Oh, I think he knows exactly what time it is,” Keith said, pulling open the door and ignoring Shiro’s protests.It occurred to Keith as he was slamming the door behind him that his neighbor was still probably in the shower.But he’d had it and he was already standing in front of their door, a welcome mat beneath his feet.Rapping his fist on the door, Keith crossed his arms and waited.When it didn’t immediately open, he knocked again.

The door swung open and a large man in a yellow shirt blinked at him, his mouth opening.The piece of pizza that had been dangling from it fell to the floor with a splat.“Ah,” the man whined, staring down at the piece of pizza, “That was my last one.”Considering it for a moment, he reached down and held it in front of his face, inspecting it.“I’m sure it’s fine,” he declared, taking a bite.“What can I do for you, buddy?”

“I want to talk to whatever asshole in this apartment think it’s okay to sing at the top of his lungs at 7:30 in the morning.And I’m not your buddy.”

The man scratched his ear and mumbled, “I think Lance’s still in the shower.I can tell him to cut it out, I guess, but that’s about all I can do for you.”

“Oh no.I’ll wait.”

“Whatever floats your boat,” the man shrugged.Sticking out a hand, he said, “I’m Hunk.”

Ignoring the hand, Keith said, “Keith.I’ll wait out here.”

“You live next door?”

Keith nodded, watching Hunk take another bite of the pizza.The cheese looked disturbingly white and still.“Is that cold?” Keith asked.

“Yep.”

“That’s disgusting.”

“Listen, man, the only way to eat warm pizza is if it’s come directly from the oven.I don’t have the time or energy for that right now.”

It went silent between them.Typically, that wasn’t something Keith strictly minded but the longer he stood out here not yelling at a certain someone about their singing, the faster the anger that had carried him here dissipated.With a sigh, Keith said, “Look, I don’t have all day.Just go drag him from the shower.”

“I’m not sure…”

“I could go do it myself.”

“Nope, that’s not necessary,” Hunk said, shuffling backwards slightly.“I’ll just, uh, go get him.”He disappeared back into the apartment, leaving the door open.Leaning against the wall beside the door, Keith crossed his ankles and waited. 

Before long, a man popped his head out, short brown hair two or three shades darker than his skin.Grinning, he said, “And what can I do for _you_?”

It took a minute for Keith to remember what he was going to say because this guy—Lance, presumably—was kind of gorgeous and so very shirtless, his damp hair dripping onto his shoulders.And Keith was so very gay.The guy’s grin subtly widened and that was enough to snap Keith out of his unhelpful interest in a drop of water that was making its way slowly down Lance’s chest.“You can go fuck yourself,” Keith said succinctly.

“Hey, now.You were the one that forced me out of the shower.I’ll have you know it was very warm and very _wet_.”

Feeling himself flush, Keith crossed his arms harder and said, “Well, if you want to enjoy a warm and _wet_ shower ever again, I suggest you stop fucking singing while you do it.At least when it’s 7:30 in the goddamn morning!”

“I should’ve brought the swear jar out here with me.Happen to have two dollars?I can put them in for you.”

“Goddamn isn’t a swear word.”

“Kind of is, actually.”

“Whatever.That isn’t the point.The point is that I’m getting tired of your singing waking me up.Keep it the fuck down.”

“That’s three dollars now,” Lance said, still smiling.What an absolute dick.

Stepping forward, Keith said, “I can make your life hell.Either shower later in the day or stop singing.”With that, Keith turned around and headed back to his apartment.

Lance called after him.“That might actually be threatening if you didn’t sport a mullet, mullet-head.”

“Oh, there’s one I haven’t heard before,” Keith said, glaring at him from his door.“How original.”

“How about fun-killer?Have you heard that?Because that’s what you really are.”

Scrambling for words, Keith said, “Yeah, well, you sing both parts of a duet.Guess who does that?Fucking nerds.”

“I bet I sang them well, though.”

“Did not.”

“Totally did.”

“Only shitty singing is capable of waking me up,” Keith shot back.

“I think you’re up to six dollars now.”

“Oh my god,” Keith yelled, opening the door to his apartment in a rush.“Stop singing and stay out of my life.”

“That might be difficult if you’re going to keep your promise to make my life hell!”

Slamming the door again, taking extreme pleasure from the sound, Keith rounded on Shiro and Allura who were eating their cereal just as calmly as when he’d left.In a casual voice, Shiro said, “Do I need to help bury a body?”

“I wish,” Keith said on his way back to his room, not missing the soft giggling Shiro and Allura were sharing.He didn’t have work until ten.And since Lance was out of the shower, there was hope of getting more sleep.Taking his jeans off, he got back into bed and hiked the sheets up around his shoulders. 

Right when he closed his eyes, he heard Lance singing, “Stylin’, whilen, livin’ it up in the city.Got Chucks on with Saint Laurent.Gotta kiss myself, I’m so pretty.Too hot…”It was louder than it had ever been.The asshole was probably right on the other side of the wall.

Sitting up in a flash, he pounded his fist against the wall, and shouted, “I’m researching how to murder someone and not get caught as we speak.”

Very distinctly, he heard Lance cackling, the laughter trailing off the further Lance moved away from the wall.

 

Seven long hours of waitering later, Keith trudged back to his apartment, Pidge walking beside him.She was the only friend he’d managed to make in the years he’d worked at the small local diner her family owned.They’d started talking because her dad forced her to help out sometimes, pulling her away from her computer.“I’m just saying,” she said, “It might be worth being an insect once just so you can breathe through your sides.Like, how cool is that?”

“I need a lifespan longer than five days.”

“Actually, even flies have a longer life span than that.”

“Whatever.I need a longer lifespan and less legs,” Keith said, leading the way up the stairs of his apartment building.When they got to his door, he found Lance sitting in the hallway between their two doors, arms hanging off his knees, head leaning back against the wall.He was wearing a jacket Keith kind of wanted to steal, despite it’s ugly brown color.Black would’ve been better.Or red.

“Keith,” Lance said, jumping up.“It’s Keith, right?”

“Yeah.”

“My buddy, my pal, I need your help.”

“Oh, really?” Keith asked, smirking.

Lance paled slightly and glanced at Pidge.“Surely you could show mercy in the presence of a lady.”

“Who is he calling a lady?” Pidge asked, studying him with interest.“I don’t know this guy, Keith.Which is weird, because you don’t have any friends.”

“I have friends.”

“There’s me and there’s Shiro.And Shiro’s your brother.”

Handing Pidge the key to his apartment, Keith said, “Why don’t you go inside, Pidge?I’ll be right there.”

She shot him a searching look and then shrugged, unlocking the door and stepping in.Although she shut the door behind her, Keith suspected she was standing right behind it, ears perked in interest.Shifting his gaze back to Lance, Keith said, “Ah, how the tables have turned.”

“You’re enjoying this too much.”

“You should’ve thought of that while you sang ‘Uptown Funk’ just to spite me this morning.”

“How could I have predicted what was going to happen?” Lance asked, waving his arms wildly.This guy was very emotive.It would be kind of adorable if Keith didn’t hate his guts.

“That’s not my problem, is it?” Keith said, opening the door of his apartment, not at all surprised to find Pidge within five feet of it, her expression slightly guilty as she pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose.As he turned to shut the door, Lance was still there, eyes pleading.

“Come on, man.Please.I left my keys in my apartment and my phone’s dead.I just need a place to crash until Hunk gets home.I’ll stay out of your way.If you need, like, payment or something, I can do your dishes or…vacuum,” Lance finished lamely.

“Vacuum.”

“I’ll do anything.This hallway is kind of creepy and this one girl has passed by me like three times and I think she thinks I’m homeless or something.”

“Anything?” Keith asked, raising an eyebrow.

For some reason, that made Lance blush.When it occurred to Keith just how that could’ve been interpreted—how Lance had clearly interpreted it—he blushed, too.In a slightly more subdued voice, Lance said, “Yeah, anything.Just get me out of this hallway.”

“If you stop singing in the shower, you’ve got yourself a deal.”

“And fun-killer is back.”

“I didn’t have to be up for another two hours.”

“Oh, cry me a river,” Lance said.“I happen to know it’s an absolute fucking delight to wake up to my singing.I’ve been told I have the voice of an angel.”

“By your mom?”

“Yes, actually.What’s your point?”

“That hardly counts,” Keith said.

“True.I bet your mom says your mullet is attractive.”

“My mom’s dead.”

“Oh, shit, I’m sorry,” Lance said genuinely.“That really sucks, dude.I don’t know what I’d do without my mom, even though I don’t see her as much as I’d like.”

Keith had absolutely nothing to say to that.Leaning up against the doorjamb, he simply waited to see what Lance would do.There was a moment of silence, Lance fidgeting, and then he sighed loudly.“I could _try_ and avoid singing before nine in the morning.”

Shaking his head, Keith considered leaving Lance stranded.What Lance had proposed clearly didn’t benefit him in the slightest and it would be so satisfying to shut the door in his face.But if it was him out there, without a way to get into his apartment, he’d want Lance to help him.Rolling his eyes, he stepped out of the way and motioned for Lance to enter.

“Sweet!” Lance said, strolling in as though he owned the place.Peering around, he said, “Nice place.I like all the plants.”There really were plants everywhere, some hanging, most on every available surface.Keith didn’t hate them, but he did think there were far too many of them.

“My brother’s girlfriend likes plants,” Keith mumbled, seeing Pidge on the couch and slumping down beside her.He couldn’t interpret the look she gave him, so he just shrugged, watching as Lance made his way around the apartment, inspecting every goddamn thing and commenting on it.It was nice that he thought anybody cared.

When he’d finished with that, he sat down in a chair to the side of the couch, slightly angled so whoever was sitting there could see the television.“You said you had a brother?” Lance asked, eyes bright and curious.

“I thought you were going to stay out of my way,” Keith replied

“Yes,” Pidge said.“He has a brother.His name is Shiro.Basically, he’s this crazy gorgeous man with an equally gorgeous girlfriend and they’re both super nice.”

“Where are they?”

Pidge glanced down at the watch around her wrist.“Shiro should be home any second.It’s unlikely Allura will be with him, because it’s a Thursday.She’s never here on Thursdays.I’ve been trying to figure out why.Keith won’t tell me.”

“So he’s like this all the time?To everyone?”

“Stop talking about me like I’m not here.”

“Pretty much,” Pidge said.

“How does he keep it up?It’s gotta be a lot of work moping all the time.”

Keith flipped him off.

“I did an experiment on it once, actually,” Pidge said, pushing her glasses up her nose.It was a good sign she was about to talk for a very long time.“It wasn’t nearly as scientific as I would’ve liked, but it’s hard to quantify the emotions of a human being.At first, I thought it had something to do with the amount of sleep he got, but the number of bitchy things he said stayed the same, no matter how many hours of sleep he’d managed to get.Though, it’s possible he lied about the hours.Too many variables,” she sighed, shaking her head.“My second hypothesis revolved around whether Allura had spent the night or not and my third was…”

“Let’s not bore our guest,” Keith interrupted.The last thing Lance needed to hear about was his nonexistent sex life.Needless to say, Pidge’s third hypothesis had not even been testable.

“I’ll have you know that was utterly fascinating,” Lance said, though his eyes were slightly glazed over.“At least she treats me like a human being.”

“She wasn’t abruptly woken by “Hakuna Matata” this morning.”

“It’s a great song.”

“It is a great song,” Pidge agreed.

“Or by “Single Ladies” practically every day like two months ago.Or by the Moana soundtrack whatever month that came out.”

“Those are all great songs!” Lance protested.“I mean, have you seen _Moana_?That girl is seriously inspiring.She started the movie not knowing how to sail and by the end she’s like best friends with a demigod, knows how to sail, and sang her own goddamn name off the end of a boat in the middle of the ocean.I want to be her.”

“Of course you do,” Keith said.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing.”

“Are you throwing shade at my masculinity?Because I’ll have you know, liking Disney princesses has absolutely no relation to…” 

“Throwing shade?” Keith asked, laughing shortly.“Did you seriously just say that?”

“Yes I did, mullet head.”

Keith opened his mouth to throw another retort back, when Pidge spoke.“I need you two to stop.I’m going to get a headache.”

“Sorry, Pidge,” Keith said.

“So you are capable of saying something nice.”

“To people that matter, yeah.”

“God, shut up!” Pidge yelled.That brought both Keith and Lance to a sudden halt, Lance looking sheepish and Keith feeling the exact same way.“I’m going to turn the TV on and we’re all going to watch until Shiro gets here.In silence.”She grabbed the remote from the coffee table and turned the TV on, flipping through channels, until she landed on PBS, where they were playing a special on the Amazon.Without thinking, Keith glanced at Lance and rolled his eyes.Lance smirked in return.

Realizing he was sympathizing with his enemy, Keith frowned and actually paid attention to the program.Within five seconds, he knew he’d seen it before.“Pidge, we’ve watched this.”

“So?” 

“At least three times.”

“So?It’s better than listening to you two flirt.”

“I am not flirting,” Keith said, crossing his arms over his chest and slumping further into the couch.

“Yeah,” Lance agreed.“Me neither.You’d both know if I was flirting because Keith would be swooning into my arms.”

“I don’t swoon.”

“That’s what they all say,” Lance said smoothly, winking.

“Does that actually work on anybody?”

“I have game you can’t even comprehend.”

“Uh huh,” Keith said, unimpressed.

“How’s brooding working for you?”

“Fine, thanks.”

“Well, I hope you like _Twilight_ because that’s going to be the favorite book of any girl who's interested in you,” Lance said, smiling like he’d won something.“They’ll probably try to call you Edward in bed.”

“I don’t give a shit about girls.”

That threw Lance off, his mouth gaping like a fish, and Keith was going to comment on how ridiculous he looked, because he couldn’t resist—an urge he would have to examine later when he was alone—when the door opened and Shiro walked in, book bag on his shoulder.

“Hey, Shiro,” Pidge said.

Smiling, Shiro greeted her and then his eyes landed on Lance.“Hey.What’s your name?”

“Lance.Cool scar, bro.”

“Thanks,” Shiro said easily, placing his book bag on the floor by the door.Walking into the kitchen, he washed his hands at the sink and then said, “You want to stay for dinner?I’m making macaroni and cheese.”

“Fuck yeah,” Lance said.“I love macaroni and cheese.”

“He can’t stay,” Keith said.“He’s only here until his roommate gets home.”Lance glared at him, but didn’t argue for once.

Shiro glanced back and forth between the two of them and then his eyes widened in awareness.“I thought I recognized your voice,” he said.“You’re the guy who sings in the shower.I’m surprised Keith let you in.”

“I’m impossible to resist.”

“Apparently,” Shiro said, smiling knowingly at Keith.It made Keith want to shove his face into boiling water.There was absolutely nothing to smile knowingly about.Lance was infuriating, with his dumb face and his dumb smile and his dumb hair.

There was a knock on the door and Shiro went to answer it, tying an apron in place as he walked.Peering around Shiro to see who was there, the unmistakable yellow of the shirt Hunk had been wearing this morning came into view.“Hi,” Hunk said nervously.“You are…wow.Incredibly handsome.That’s, uh…anyway, I know you don’t know me or Lance, but he should be home and he’s not and he’s actually pretty good about telling me where he is, so I was wondering if you’d seen him?”

“You’ve come to the right place,” Shiro said with a smile.“Do you want to stay for dinner, too?I can make a double batch of macaroni and cheese.”

“Lance isn’t staying,” Keith shouted.

“Shut up, Keith.I’m totally staying.Nobody cares what you think.”

Standing from the couch and walking towards Shiro, Keith grabbed the crook of his arm, tugging him back into the kitchen.Turning his back to Lance, he murmured, “What the hell are you doing?”

“Making friends.What does it look like?”

“I don’t want to make friends.Especially with these people.”

All Shiro did was stare at him.Then he slapped Keith on the shoulder and went back to the door.“Sorry about my brother.So, do you want to stay?”

“That sounds great, actually,” Hunk said.“I haven’t been to the store in awhile and while I could probably whip something up from what I have, I don’t…”

“You cook?” Shiro interrupted, sounding genuinely interested.Keith just knew he was smiling.It was enviable, the way he could put people immediately at ease.

“Yeah.I’m pretty good at it or whatever.”

“He’s incredible,” Lance piped up, raising himself from the chair and coming to stand beside Keith in the kitchen.“I would actually pay him to cook for me, but on the bright side, he’s the bestest friend a guy could have and he offers me his food free of charge.”

“In that case, you should help me,” Shiro said.“If you want.”

“Sure,” Hunk said, strolling into the apartment.“Nice place.Lots of plants.”

“They’re Allura’s,” Shiro said, his eyes softening.Keith wanted to hurl.Looking to his side, expecting to see Pidge there, because she usually was—and always ready to complain about Allura and Shiro with him—instead he saw Lance.Their eyes met and Lance grinned.

“Why are you always _there_?” Keith said in a huff, escaping the kitchen and returning to his spot beside Pidge, who had proceeded to pull her phone out.She was probably researching something, because that was what she did with her free time.Keith would never admit it out loud, but he found it kind of adorable.

Knowing she was in an insect phase, Keith said, “Hit me with another obscure insect fact.”

“Aphids are born pregnant.They literally give birth ten days after their born.That’s reproduction done right.”

“Certainly efficient.”

Pidge nodded, her eyes fixed on her screen, clearly reading more about aphids.Presumably, how exactly being born pregnant worked scientifically.Pidge always spared him knowledge like that, knowing he wouldn't understand all the jargon she used and that, no matter how willing she was to explain, he wouldn’t want to understand.

Turning his gaze back to the kitchen, Keith absentmindedly listened as Hunk and Lance babbled to Shiro about cooking and the events that had led Lance to this apartment in the first place.Shiro smiled and laughed and asked questions in the rare moments that Lance actually stopped talking.If it was anyone else, Keith would accuse them of showing false interest, but it was Shiro.He did actually care about these random strangers’ lives.

At least Keith had Pidge.She was the one friend he’d ever had that didn’t immediately decide they liked Shiro better.

“You could try being nice to him,” Pidge said, breaking through his thoughts.

“Huh?”

“Lance.”

“Why would I do that?” Keith asked, tearing his eyes away from Lance.

“Because you just stared at him for fifteen seconds,” Pidge said, holding up her phone and showing him a stopwatch that did, in fact, read fifteen seconds.“Since it was longer than six seconds, psychology would say you either want to have sex with him or murder him.”

“I definitely want to murder him.”

“Sure, Keith,” Pidge said, patting his arm.Then in a quieter voice, she continued by saying, “Who am I kidding?Nice isn’t really in your wheelhouse.”

“I’m nice to you.”

“Sort of.And that’s because you love me.”

“Love you?” Keith teased, bumping his arm against hers.“Who said that I love you?I’m going to beat them up.”

Laughing, Pidge nudged him back and then reset her timer.“Stare at Lance some more, would you?I want to make sure those fifteen seconds weren’t a fluke.”

 

Dinner was…bizarre.Their apartment was rarely this crowded and they certainly weren’t prepared for the company.Though Shiro preferred eating at the table, there simply wasn’t room, so everyone spread out around the living room, some on couches, some on the floor.Lance, somehow, ended up next to Keith.He had a penchant for talking while his mouth was full of food and Keith quickly added that to the list of things he couldn’t stand about Lance.It was a very important list.It kept him from remembering the small bead of water winding down Lance’s bare chest, skin brown and smooth.

The real reason it was strange, though, was that they all got along.Pidge and Hunk hit it off right away with their mutual love of science and computers.Shiro and Lance hit it off with everyone.Keith didn’t talk much, but he thought maybe he was happy.It wasn’t in his nature to surround himself with people, but it was undeniably nice having his ears filled with the sounds of laughter and chatter.

When it appeared that everyone was finished, Keith silently walked around and picked up everyone’s dishes, taking them to the sink and beginning to wash them out.Their dishwasher didn’t handle cheese well, so he had to really scrub.

Halfway through the second dish, someone came up beside him and began loading the dishwasher.Peering over, Keith saw Lance.Before he could say anything, likely something snide, Lance said, “Your brother’s really cool.”

“Yeah,” Keith said.

“What happened to him?You know, with the scar and the prosthetic arm.”

“IED.Afghanistan.”

“Shit.”

Keith nodded, keeping his eyes focused on the task in front of him.When he finished, he was about to set the bowl on the towel next to the sink when Lance took it from his hands and placed it in the dishwasher.“You still can’t sing before nine,” Keith said, staring at him.

“Alright, first, I said _try_.Second, I’m not helping you so you’ll forget about the singing, although I gotta admit, if that’s a possibility, that would be great.”

“Why are you helping me then?”

“Because my mom taught me that if someone feeds me, I should help them clean up,” Lance said, smiling slightly.

“Momma’s boy?”

“Yep.”

A flood of questions bubbled to the tip of Keith’s lips.He could ask where Lance’s family lived, if he had any siblings, what their names were, if he missed them, but Keith’d woken up angry this morning and he was going to stay that way.Whatever it took to make this guy understand that he wouldn’t get away with waking Keith up again.So, instead, he just nodded and kept washing.

“I miss them, you know.My entire family,” Lance said, talking through the clattering of dishes.“I came here for the engineering program because it’s supposed to be really excellent or whatever, but sometimes I wonder if it was really worth it.I guess I have Skype.”When Keith didn’t respond immediately, Lance stared at him exasperatedly.“You’re either determined to have the last word or you aren’t speaking.It’s strange, dude.”

“I didn’t have anything to say.”

“Huh.Alright.Can’t say I know what that’s like, but I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt.”Lance loaded the last of the dishes and then leaned his hip against the counter, staring at Keith, who suddenly had absolutely nothing to do.“What would you say to giving me your number?”

“I would say we live next door to each other.And that you woke me up at 7:30 in the fucking morning.”

“Yeah, okay, that’s kind of what I expected.Hunk,” Lance called.“We should get out of their hair.I have homework to do.”

“Ugh,” Hunk said.“Don’t remind me.Hey, Shiro, thanks for dinner.You’re a cool dude.”

“You’re welcome anytime.”

“I should go, too,” Pidge said.“I’ll see you tomorrow, Keith.”

“Yeah.See you, Pidge.”

Keith watched passively as Lance, Hunk, and Pidge gathered their things and made their way to the door.When Hunk waved at him shyly, he waved back.

Once the door was firmly closed, Keith headed for his bedroom. 

“Keith, come on, I haven’t seen you all day,” Shiro said.

“I’m really not in the mood.”

“Are you seriously upset about me inviting them for dinner?Because if you are, I won’t do it again.It just kind of seemed like you liked Lance,” Shiro said, eyes sympathetic and understanding.

“Liked Lance?Are you serious?”

“Alright, maybe not.I won’t do it again.”

Grimacing, Keith looked down at the floor, shuffling his feet.“I mean, it’s…it’s fine.If you like them or whatever.”

“Okay,” Shiro smiled.

“Oh, stop staring at me like that,” Keith said, heading into his room and shutting the door behind him.Throwing himself down on the bed, he wondered how he’d ended up here.All he’d wanted to do was get Lance to shut the fuck up.

 

The next morning, Keith woke to the sound of Lance belting out yet another song.“I’m so fancy.You already know.I’m in the fast lane, from L.A. to Tokyo…”

Finding his phone, he checked the time.It was 8:00.Shaking his head, smiling despite himself, Keith launched out of bed, found his iHome, plugged it in, and then scrolled through artists on his phone.Finding My Chemical Romance, he pressed on “Helena”.Then he stuck his phone onto the jack and kept pressing the plus button, increasing the volume, until he knew Lance would be able to hear it.

A mere fifteen seconds later, Shiro showed up in his room, yawning and saying, “I thought we were done with the My Chemical Romance phase.”

“Haven’t you heard?” Keith said.“My Chemical Romance is in again.”


	2. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second chapter here we gooooo  
> Thank you to everyone who read this and commented and stuff. That was delightful and lovely and kind of unexpected so I'm all about it.  
> I also want to thank Camille for constant song recommendations and telling me the chapter is good before I post it so I worry about it less. And just for texting me the words 'rock opera'  
> Also, you can fine me @itsthegameilike on tumblr if you want to hit me up with anything. I love chatting.  
> Enjoy! <3

For a week, their feud continued, Lance singing songs that were aggressively pop, and Keith blasting songs that were aggressively emo and irritating; My Chemical Romance, Simple Plan, Twenty One Pilots, Hawthorne Heights…but Lance didn’t seem to mind, singing away while fully knowing the repercussions.The other neighbors sure as hell did mind, though.Keith didn’t care, but on Thursday, when he returned from work, Shiro sat him down and asked him to find another way to resolve the feud.Though, he hadn’t called it a feud.In fact, his eyebrows had scrunched up and he’d actually said, “Resolve… _this_ ,” his eyes revealing a man who was seriously considering throwing himself from a cliff.Or, at least, pushing Keith off of one.

“You’re twenty-one, Keith,” Shiro continued, taking a bite of the salad he’d made.“I have complete faith that you can handle this like an adult.”

“Why should I?” Keith grumbled, picking at his serving of salad.“He’s not.”

“Because the neighbors are gathering fire and pitchforks.”

“I can take them.”

“I’m sure you can, seeing as I’m the one they harass in the halls,” Shiro said.

“It’s your fault you decided to be friends with everyone in the goddamn building.”

“Keith…”

“Fine,” Keith sighed.“I’ll try.”

“Thank you.”Then, with a small smile, Shiro said, “And if you do decide to play something tomorrow, make sure it’s something I don’t want to kill myself to.”

Nodding, Keith finished his salad, wondering why Shiro put up with him.The guilt for doing nothing but making Shiro’s life harder clawed at him, so that by the time they’d both finished dinner, he’d descended into a deep, unshakeable silence.There was so much Shiro did for him.Provided food, housing, and affection, all while going to grad school and dealing with poor sleep from his chronic nightmares and all Keith did was make it worse.

“Want to watch something?” Shiro asked.

“Nah,” Keith replied quietly.“I think I’m going to go to the garage and work on my motorcycle.”

“Alright.Text me when you get there and when you leave.”

“Sure,” Keith said, going to his room and grabbing his keys, headphones, and jacket.The days were starting to warm, summer approaching, but not enough for the nights to be anything but freezing.

“Love you,” Shiro said to his back.Keith didn’t say anything in reply, stepping out of the apartment and closing the door behind him.He considered locking it, but knew that Shiro would if he decided to go to bed before Keith got back.

Setting off down the hall towards the stairs—Keith much preferred them to waiting for the elevator—he plugged his headphones into his phone and scrolled through playlists to find something he wanted to listen to.He was about to click on “Hey You” by Pink Floyd, when he ran straight into something warm and hard.

Jerking his head up in surprised, Keith saw Lance staring down at him and smiling.Rolling his eyes in an attempt to counter the embarrassed blush rising on his cheeks, he said, “Oh, it’s you.”Then he kept walking, making sure he looked up occasionally so he didn’t smack into someone else.

“I don’t even get a hello?” Lance called after him.“Or a goodbye?You’re breaking my heart, man.”

At the door leading to the stairs, Keith glanced behind him and saw that Lance was still standing where he’d left him, watching Keith, his smile at full blast.It made Keith feel kind of queasy, just the idea that someone could see him and want to smile like that.Digging deep, feeling off his game for multiple reasons, Keith said, “You’re an easy going guy.I’m sure your heart’ll be fine in a few minutes.”

“I knew you wouldn’t be able to resist,” Lance said, practically skipping down the hallway towards Keith.He stopped when they were a couple feet apart.“Kudos to you, by the way.Hawthorne Heights was a nice touch.I hadn’t heard them in _ages_.”

“Happy to help,” Keith said, pushing open the door to the stairs and stepping through.When he heard the door close, he thought he was in the clear, but when he stepped out onto the pavement, after a few flights of stairs, and took a long moment to breathe in the cool air, ragged breathing broke through the quiet.“For fuck’s sake,” Keith breathed, turning to see Lance bending over, his hands on his knees, and breathing exaggeratedly.

“It’s work keeping up with you, baby, but I’m up for the challenge.”

“There’s no way you ran.”

“I so totally did.You’re worth running for.”

“Whatever,” Keith said.“Just leave me alone.”

“Where are you going?”

“Out.”

“Can I come with you?”

“Why on earth…”Keith caught himself and shook his head.“No.”

“Why not?”

“Because I said so.”

A kicked puppy look passed over Lance’s face and Keith felt his heart clench.It was so goddamn unfair.He hardly knew Lance, but he knew enough to know an expression like that shouldn’t be on his face.Cursing silently to himself, Keith said, “I want to be alone.But it doesn’t…it doesn’t have anything to do with you, alright?”It came out harsher than he’d intended.

“Are you sure I can’t come with you?” Lance said.“I hear what you’re saying, I do, but I’ve been throwing out the garbage for twenty minutes now because Hunk is stress baking and his maybe girlfriend Shay is asking him all sorts of quiz questions and it’s making me anxious just being around them.”

“Midterms?” Keith said.

“Yep.I should probably be studying, too, but, uh, focus is not my strong suit and I’ve already tried studying for like three hours.You got any?Midterms, I mean.”

“I don’t go to college.”

“How’d you…”

“Pidge.”

“Pidge?But she’s like fifteen or something, isn’t she?She’s definitely younger than I am,” Lance said.

“Sixteen.She’s really smart.College was the next step for her in science and math so her high school helped her out.”

“Is that pride I detect?”

Keith didn’t respond, fiddling with his fingerless gloves, and wishing he could somehow retract from the conversation and get to the garage without causing another bereft expression.“I won’t get in your way,” Lance said, voice pleading.

“Like you didn’t get in my way when I let you into my apartment?”

“I wasn’t going to say no to Shiro, man.Have you seen your brother?Like, I’m pretty sure he could ask me to drive off a cliff and I would.”

“Yeah, you and everyone else,” Keith mumbled.

“Hey, I’m out here with you, aren’t I?”

That was not the response Keith had expected.He felt gutted and unsure all of a sudden.Lance was his early morning music rival.He was not supposed to say genuinely nice things or be perceptive enough to say something that meant so much.“Fine,” Keith said.“Try to keep your mouth shut.”Then, without another word, he set off down the street, shoving his hands in the pockets of his zip up.When Lance caught up with him, he peered out of the corner of his eye to catch a glimpse of a bowed head and fidgeting fingers.Keith removed his headphones from his ears.

Lance managed to keep silent for the entire ten minute walk, but when they stopped in front of a house with the lights out and Keith headed up the driveway, words burst out of his mouth.“Um, we aren’t robbing a house or anything, right?I really didn’t sign up to rob a house.”

“It would serve you right,” Keith said.

“So we are?Dude, what can I do to talk you out of robbing this house?Because my mom would actually murder me if I robbed a house.Oh god, is that why you’re wearing all black?I should’ve known,” Lance said, his voice getting increasingly dramatic.

“Oh my god, we’re not robbing the house,” Keith sighed, taking keys from his pocket and unlocking the padlock at the bottom of the garage door holding it closed.Pushing it up, he stepped inside and fumbled for the light.Flicking it on, he smiled.There it was.His bike.Though a fair amount was still in pieces, he could see what it was going to look like without any trouble.It was going to be beautiful and it was going to work and Keith would be able to ride it.

In the background, Lance was still chattering away worriedly.“…murder me?I mean, I know you’re upset about my early morning singing, but this might be taking it a bit too far.”

Wishing he really had brought Lance here to murder him, Keith tugged a hairband off his wrist and pulled his hair into a short ponytail and then pulled up a stool and toolbox beside his bike.Without further ado, he continued his work on attaching various accessories to the frame, like handlebars and fenders and taillights.Just recently, he’d managed to find all of the necessary parts online and in salvage yards.

“Oh my god,” Lance breathed.“You’re building a motorcycle.You are building your own motorcycle.That is so cool!” 

He was about to pick up the pieces of metal that would make up the fenders, but Keith said, “Don’t touch anything.”

“Oh, sorry,” Lance said, backing away and sitting on the floor of the garage in a relatively clear area.He was looking around the space curiously and Keith found himself watching, kind of amazed that Lance hadn’t already declared himself bored and left.He’d probably be able to find his way home.“So do you, like, own this house or something?”Lance’s eyes returned to Keith and Keith immediately glanced back down at his work, embarrassed that he’d been caught staring.

“No,” Keith said.“The guy who lives here rents me use of his garage for a hundred bucks a month.”

“Can you ride it or is that something you’re going to figure out when you’re finished?”

Sighing, Keith said, “I can ride it.And this isn’t the first one I’ve built.”

“Really?”

“The other four weren’t super safe.Practice makes perfect or whatever.”

“My mom always says practice makes better,” Lance replied.Keith thought maybe he was done, but he wasn’t.“This is so cool, I can’t get over it.It almost makes you seem fun, which I was pretty damn sure was impossible, because you are surprisingly unfun about literally everything else.”

“Are you even trying to shut up?”

“Not at all.This is too cool for that, man,” Lance said.

“Do you know a word other than cool?”

Not deterred in the slighest, Lance said, “Amazing, wonderful, awesome, incredible, inspiring, uh…fan-fucking-tastic.I’m so jealous.I wish I could do something like this.All I’m capable of is going to school and even that’s kind of iffy.” 

“School’s not easy,” Keith said, keeping his eyes very focused on his task.It felt like he’d given too much information away to his rival already, but he was beginning to wonder how committed to the rivalry Lance actually was.This felt distinctly different.

“It’s gotta be easier than building a motorcycle.”

Keith shrugged and was so grateful when Lance went silent.He stood from his spot on the floor and came to sit beside him, warmth emanating from his body into the few inches between them.In the cold of the garage, it was nice.He worked and Lance watched.Keith could tell that Lance was getting antsy about a half hour in and he knew he shouldn’t care, but he hadn’t had anyone here with him before besides Shiro, and it was kind of comforting in a way he hadn’t expected.So he said, “You ever ride one of these?”

“No.Definitely not.Add that to the list of things my mom would probably murder me for.They’re dangerous and stuff.”

“That’s kind of what the helmets are for.”

“Oh, so the emo, too-cool-for-you guy wears a helmet, huh?”

“I’m not interested in dying,” Keith said.

“Your music would suggest otherwise.”

“I don’t actually listen to any of those bands anymore.I just thought they would piss you off.”

Lance laughed at that, bright and infectious.Keith had to fight off a smile.“I hate to disappoint you, mullet head, but I actually find it hilarious.Almost as hilarious as you showing up at my door and yelling at me.It’s like you’re saying good morning through the wall.Well, good morning and I want to die.”

“Wonderful.”

“Don’t sweat it, gorgeous.It’s still the best good morning I get all day.”

Suddenly deciding Lance could be as uncomfortable as he wanted—mostly because that flirtation in particular rattled Keith for some reason—Keith picked up the handlebars and worked on installing those.It was not something he would probably finish tonight, but that was alright.Sweat was beading on his upper lip and the back of his neck and he could feel a not unpleasant soreness in his biceps.

“You really know what you’re doing,” Lance said appreciatively.When Keith looked at him to frown, Lance grinned.It was hard not to wonder, after two flirtatious comments in a row, if Lance just flirted with him or if he flirted with everyone.The idea that it Lance might be flirting with him for something besides the sake of flirting, made Keith’s stomach twist uncomfortably.

It went silent again and Keith hated that he minded.He hated that this was not the time alone he’d wanted and yet, it was somehow better.He hated that this asshole who did not have the common decency to listen and stop doing asshole things, was distinctly not an asshole when the sun wasn’t rising.He hated that he was absolutely determined to keep this relationship firmly in the category of rivalry, when it probably wouldn’t be the worst thing to be this guy’s friend.Why had Keith let him come?

Even worse was the realization that the longer the silence went on, the more aware Keith became of how close he and Lance were and of how intently Lance was watching his hands.The vision of Lance shirtless, dripping water, once again featured in Keith’s thoughts and he let go of his bike, standing abruptly.

“Oh, are we leaving?” Lance asked, standing too.

“Yeah,” Keith said.He’d come back tomorrow to do a proper clean up and finish those handlebars.All he knew was that he had to get out of this garage and away from Lance.In the back of his mind, he had a list of things he wasn’t supposed to think about and Lance shirtless was definitively on it.Shirtless Lance was not going to fuel his righteous anger.Or, for that matter, Lance smiling.Lance thinking his motorcycle was cool.Lance acting like watching Keith build his bike was the best part of his day.

Digging his phone from his pocket to check the time, Keith swore fluidly.

“You alright, man?” Lance asked.

“I just forgot to text Shiro.”

“Did I distract you?” Lance smirked.

Flipping him off, Keith typed back a quick message saying he was sorry and that he was on his way home and then he flicked off the garage light and locked it back up tight. 

The two of them headed back the way they’d come and Lance started babbling again.Keith wondered if words built up in Lance and that if he didn’t talk enough, they simply spilled out without filter or control.

“…paint?Because that bike would look really nice with some slick white paint.Or blue.Oh, god, please make it blue.I love blue.”

“I’m sorry, is it your bike?”

Lance threw his arm around Keith’s neck and swept his other hand through the air in front of them, encouraging Keith to imagine the scenario he was imagining, “No, but blue, Keith. _Blue_.It’s the color of the sky and the ocean and my favorite shirt.Why wouldn’t you want it to be blue?I promise you there wouldn’t be a girl, excuse me, _boy_ , who could resist you riding around on a blue motorcycle.Think of all the fabulous times that could be had.”

The arm around Keith’s neck was a comfortable weight and he resisted the urge to lean into Lance’s warmth, shrugging the arm off uncomfortably and saying, “It’s going to be red.”

“Huh,” Lance said.“Well, I guess it could be worse.It could be black.Honestly, I was kind of expecting black because that’s literally all you wear.”

“You’ve seen me a total of twice in your entire life.”

“And you’ve worn all black both times,” Lance said.

“Well, that doesn’t make you an expert.”

“Is there a Keith expert?”

“No,” Keith replied.

Laughing, Lance said, “So tell me, is it exhausting being all dark and mysterious?  Side note: I was going to say tall, dark, and handsome, but you’re, like, super short.Well, shorter than me, anyway.”

“Is it exhausting talking so much?”

“Nope.”

Keith rolled his eyes and used the hands in his jacket’s pockets to pull it tighter around his body.It was even colder than it had been when he’d left.There was silence between them for a few minutes, but then Lance started humming while he walked—Keith didn’t know the song—and it was enough to remind him why he and Lance weren’t friends, why Keith didn’t want to be.He was stubborn.On principal, he couldn’t like the guy who woke him up most mornings.Sleep came easier to him than it did for Shiro, but it wasn’t _that_ easy.

“Humming?” Keith said.“Really?”

Instead of responding, Lance started to sing, hopping in front of Keith and walking backwards as he sang so he could look at Keith as he did it, throw in some dance moves, and get into his face.Half-heartedly, Keith shoved Lance’s shoulder and said, “Get out of my way.”

“Why are you so mean?” Lance complained, pouting.“We’ve been bonding, Keith.Bonding.”

“You just think that if I like you, you can sing in the shower without repercussions.”

“Well, that’s pessimistic.Where’s your faith in humanity?Where’s your trust?Don’t I look like a trustworthy guy?I wouldn’t use you like that.”

“Whatever.”

“How old are you?”

“Twenty-one,” Keith sighed.

“You really like the word ‘whatever’ for a twenty-one year old.”

“Yeah, I need to grow up.I get it.”Thankfully, they had reached their apartment complex and Keith unlocked the door, holding it open just long enough for Lance to get his fingers around it, before speeding up the stairs, completely ditching him.There was a little guilt associated with the action, but it wasn’t like Lance could get lost at this point.

“Hey, woah,” Lance called after him.“I don’t have a problem with it or anything.Like, seriously, have you met me?Keith, come on, man!” 

Keith didn’t slow down, not until he was almost at the door of his apartment.Figuring he had some time, he leaned against the wall and caught his breath and prepared himself to face Shiro, who would almost definitely want to talk.It was the price he would have to pay for forgetting to text.

Suddenly, loud, stamping footsteps burst into his hearing and Keith jolted to attention, fumbling with his keys as he tried to unlock the front door, only to discover that Shiro hadn’t locked it in the first place.

He wasn’t fast enough.The doorknob was twisting in his hand, when Lance rounded the corner.“Shit,” Keith murmured.

“What’s your problem?” Lance said, beelining for Keith.“I’ve been perfectly nice to you and I thought we had an alright time tonight, but then I say one thing, which really wasn’t a big deal, and you run off like I’m my own ghost and you’re the murderer and my body is hanging from the ceiling of your apartment.”

“What?”

“What do you mean what?”

“Your body…hanging from my ceiling,” Keith murmured, still trying to understand why anyone would say something like that in any context.

Waving his arms around, Lance said, “You’re paying attention to the entirely wrong thing.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, how was I supposed to know that I should ignore the entire last half of what you were saying?”

“Because that’s not what I’m yelling at you about, obviously,” Lance said.

“What do you think my problem is?”

“The singing?Is that seriously what you’re going to go with right now?”

“Yes,” Keith said flatly.

“It kind of seems to me that you…”

The apartment door swung open, cutting Lance off.Shiro was standing there, a slightly disapproving look on his face.“It’s almost eleven, you guys.I don’t think anyone wants to hear you screaming at each other.Maybe save it for tomorrow?Or you could let me help.”

“Help with what?” Keith said.

Shiro sighed.Turning to Lance, he said, “Just go home, Lance.Please.”

“Yeah, sure,” Lance said, his face even sadder than it had been when he’d been begging Keith for company.It made Keith feel kind of like a dick, but he was too proud to apologize.Unsurprisingly, that didn’t make him feel less like a dick.

When Lance returned to his apartment, shutting the door softly behind him, Shiro ushered Keith in the apartment and said sternly, “That’s not what I meant when I told you to resolve it.”

“It’s not my fault he’s irritating.”

“Keith…”

“I know,” Keith sighed.“Alright?I know.”

Nodding, Shiro said, “Are you alright?”

“Fine.”

Laughing shortly, Shiro shook his head.“I don’t know why I bother asking.”Stepping forward, he wrapped Keith into a hug.Just like all of Shiro’s hugs it was nice and just like all hugs Keith received, he had no idea what to do.After the initial shock passed, he returned the hug, albeit awkwardly. 

“You’ll figure it out,” Shiro said.

“How do you know?”

“Because you’re my brother and I know you.”When Keith didn’t respond, Shiro let go of him and said, “How’s the bike?”

Keith half smiled.“Good.I’ll be able to ride her before long.”

“Make sure you get a mechanic to double check it before you do.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

“Going to bed?” Shiro asked.

“Yeah.You should too.”

“I wish you luck.”

Laughing, Keith said, “You too, bro.”

They parted and headed to their respective rooms.Before Keith turned in for the night, he picked the song he was going to blast in the morning.Whatever Shiro said, if Lance was singing, he was playing a song.After a week of it, he couldn’t imagine doing anything else.He sure as hell wasn’t going to give up now.

 

The next morning came and Keith woke to his alarm at 9:30 for the first time in what felt like a long time.A small trickle of disappointment flooded Keith’s body and he got ready for work in silence, realizing he sort of missed Lance’s voice and his dumb pop songs.There had been very few mornings since he and Shiro had moved in here where he hadn’t heard Lance singing, though most had been at reasonable hours of the day.

More and more mornings passed and though Keith often woke up early, it wasn’t ever because of Lance.Throughout the week, Keith had been through a series of emotions.First, disappointment, then worry and curiosity, and now he’d reached irritation.Why wasn’t Lance taking their rivalry seriously all of a sudden?Nothing had changed.Not really.

It was 8:30 in the morning on a Wednesday and Keith was done with the silence.Though he didn’t know much about Lance, he knew enough to know this was abnormal behavior.And however much it disturbed him, it had come to Keith’s attention over the week that he actually cared.

Stepping out of his room, he walked in on Shiro and Allura doing yoga on the living room floor.They were doing one of the warrior poses, which meant they were only warming up.“Hi, Keith,” Allura said, smiling, her long hair up in a heavy bun.“Do you want to join us?”

“Have I ever wanted to join you?”

“No.There’s no harm in asking, though, is there?It would relax you.”

“I’m busy,” Keith replied, pouring himself a cup of coffee and drinking it in large gulps.When the cup was empty, he washed it out and stuck it in the dishwasher.Heading for the door, he was stopped by Shiro.

“What exactly is busy?”

“Nothing.”

“Lance?”

Ignoring that, Keith left the apartment and banged on Lance’s door, crossing his arms and waiting.Hunk was the one to open the door, this time a tub of ice cream in one hand, a spoon in the other.Blinking, Keith said, “Do you eat anything normal for breakfast?”

“You’ve caught me on bad mornings, man.What’s up?”

“Is Lance around?”

“Yeah, I’ll go get him.”

“Thanks,” Keith said.

A few minutes later, Lance approached the door, a smug smile on his face, though Keith thought it was a little forced.“Mullet-head, what can I do for you?” he asked, leaning up against the door jamb.He was wearing slippers and a blue bathrobe, his hair definitely damp with water.Lance had definitely showered then.

“Why the fuck have you stopped singing?”

Lance’s eyebrows shot up and then he said, “You are one confusing guy, Keith.”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

“Isn’t that what you wanted?I was pretty sure that was what you wanted.In case you need a refresher, you were standing right here a couple weeks ago, yelling at me about waking you up.”

Yet again, Keith found himself in a situation he hadn’t thought through all the way.What the hell was he going to say now?He couldn’t very well admit he’d been concerned about Lance.Speaking the first words that came to mind, he said, “Well, obviously.I don’t want you to…stop being you or something, I just wanted you to stop waking me up.”

Placing a hand over his heart, Lance cooed, “You do care.”

“I do not,” Keith said.“I’ve just had a song queued up for a week and I haven’t gotten to play it.I think I’ve finally found something you’ll hate.”

“Joke’s on you.There isn’t a song I can’t learn to love.”

“Well, we’ll see about that, won’t we?” Keith asked, worrying the corner of his mouth as he stared at Lance.The half smile that had been present on Lance’s face throughout the conversation grew into a full on grin.

“I guess we will, mullet-head.”

With a nod, Keith spun on his heel and walked away.

“Hey, Keith?” Lance said.

Turning back around, he said, “What?”

“What’s your last name?”

“Kogane.”

“Better than fun-killer, anyway.”

Keith rolled his eyes and went back into his apartment.

 

The next morning, at 7:35, Keith bolted awake to the sound of Lance singing ‘Africa’ by Toto.“It’s gonna take a lot to take me away from you!There’s nothing that a hundred men…”

Grinning, Keith scrolled through his playlist, found “You’re Beautiful” by James Blunt and stuck it on his iHome, blasting it.Pressing his ear up against his wall, he tried to make out Lance’s reaction.

It was hard to tell through all the noise, but Keith was almost positive that Lance was singing along to, objectively, the worst song in existence.Keith had brainstormed this one long and hard. 

Leaping from bed, he paused it and sure enough, Lance was singing along, still going despite the abrupt halt.Pressing both hands to the wall, Keith yelled, “What the fuck is wrong with you?There is not a single person who likes that song.”

“You’re beautiful, it’s true,” Lance crooned.Then he stopped and yelled, though the words were muffled for Keith, “Doesn’t mean I can’t sing it, Kogane.I lived through the early 2000’s, just like you.Guess what?”

“What?”

“I dedicate the rest of it to you,” Lance shouted.And then he kept singing.All the way through the entire song, not a single word missed.As Keith listened—actually listened for once—he realized Lance was actually a pretty good singer, even when he was hamming it up, even when he was singing the worst song in existence.

He didn’t say that, though.Instead, he said, “Fuck you,” when Lance was finished.

“Not convincing, mullet-head.You could’ve stopped me.”

Frowning, Keith tried to think of something to say, listening to the pipes in the wall groaning as water flowed through them.The silence got long enough that Lance felt the need to talk again, “Hey, I’ve had a revolutionary idea.Wanna hear it?”

“What?”

“If you…number we…stop yelling at each other through the wall.”

“What?”

“GIVE ME YOUR NUMBER.”

“God,” Keith shouted.“Relax.And no.

“Was that a yes?That sounded like a yes.”

“Enjoy your shower, Lance,” Keith yelled, leaving his room and feeling incredibly satisfied with himself.


	3. Chapter Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's been awhile, or well, awhile for me, but this is probably the reason you shouldn't write three wip fics at once   
> Anywayyy, thanks everyone for the kudos and the comments. It gives me life, especially since I've ventured into a new fandom.  
> And thanks to Camille for laughing, getting excited, and constantly reminding me that I can actually do this  
> Enjoy! <3

On Saturday, as Keith headed out the door to walk to work, he pulled music up on his phone and considered what he wanted to listen to.Starting at the top of his artists, he scrolled down, eyes lighting up when he passed Joy Division and Nirvana.It was his ritual to scroll all the way to the bottom, though, in case something better caught his eye, so he did.

As he skimmed, he saw Taylor Swift’s name pop up.He hadn’t actually put any of her music on his phone.Pidge had done it just to irritate him and Keith honestly wasn’t entirely sure how to take it off.His mind flew back to Friday morning, when he’d stumbled out of bed and thrown clothes on to the sound of Lance singing “Out of the Woods”.It had been before nine, but Keith hadn’t fired back with his own song, knowing if he did it too often, Shiro would stop protecting him from the neighbors and Keith would actually have to talk to them.The thought alone made him cringe in horror.

Closing his eyes, Keith glanced around the street to make sure he was alone, before internally slapping himself.Nobody was going to hear his questionable life decisions.That was what headphones were for.

Tapping on Taylor Swift, he found “Out of the Woods” and played it.The music burst into his ears and Keith started grinning, remembering Lance’s rendition, which had been significantly more dramatic and with the higher notes hit better.Somehow.

Lance’s singing didn’t happen when Keith was around on weekends—probably because Lance was sleeping in—and the truth was, Keith had missed it this morning.He would never admit it to anyone, but it had become something he looked forward to.The spark of undeniable irritation—because Lance had yet to actually shower after nine like they’d agreed—followed by the low thrum of curiosity at what Lance was singing propelled Keith into an easy awakening.And if he was already up, it made it less painful to be awake sooner than he wanted to be.

When “Out of the Woods” ended, Keith played it again.And again and again and again.It was a shallow way of filling the hole left by getting ready in silence this morning.He played it until he got to work and when he paused the song and pulled the headphones from his ears, he realized he was humming it.

Unfortunately for him, so did Pidge, who was lounging at a table near the front, on her computer, food that had no doubt long gone cold beside her.Glancing up, she said, “I’m telling Shiro.”

“I’ll press buttons on your computer while you’re typing.”

“No, you won’t.And it’s already too late.The text has already been sent.Want to tell me why you’re humming Taylor Swift?”

“I’ve got work to do,” Keith said, heading towards the kitchen, where he could punch in and throw his jacket into his locker.

“Sit with me while you refill salt and pepper shakers.”

“No.”

“I’ll help,” Pidge said with a smirk.

Sighing, Keith nodded.He knew there was no distracting Pidge.When she wanted to know something, she usually found out.

After he clocked in and grabbed the half gallon containers of salt and pepper, Keith went to every table in the diner and picked up all the shakers, dropping them into a plastic bin typically used for dirty dishes.Dropping it onto Pidge’s table, he said, “I’ll take pepper, you take salt.”

“Is there a reason you’re giving me salt, Kogane?”

Keith grinned at her and got to work, twisting the tops off the pepper shakers.As he poured ground pepper carefully, not wanting to spill because he would be the one cleaning it up, Pidge said, “So…Lance.”

“Lance?”That was not where Keith had expected this conversation to go.Not this quickly, anyway.

“I’m not an idiot, Keith.You hate Taylor Swift, but I know someone who I bet likes her and he happens to serenade you every morning.”

“Hate seems like a strong…”

Pidge stopped him with a stern look.Sighing, Keith decided not to respond to the accusation behind her words, mostly because he wasn’t entirely sure what it was.He had a guess and for her sake, he hoped she didn’t go there.If she did, she could join Shiro in the pit Keith was designing.It had spikes on the bottom.

“What are you going to do about this crush you have on him?”

And he would hang out on the edge of the pit, eating delicious smelling food and laughing at them.Maybe drop them a few scraps.“I do not have a crush on Lance,” he said.

“Denying isn’t helping your case.”

“What do you want me to say?That I do?Would that convince you I don’t?”

“Nope,” Pidge said.“That also wouldn’t help your case.”

“I don’t.”

“Keith, you walked in here humming _Taylor Swift_.That is not normal.Dumb Journey songs, sure, but not Taylor Swift.”

“Journey isn’t dumb.”

Rolling her eyes, Pidge shoved the salt shaker she was working on out of the way and let the salt from the half gallon container pour out onto the table.Staring at him with blank eyes, she leaned her chin on the palm of her hand and waited.

“Pidge.”

“I’m not going to stop until you admit you have a crush.”

“It’s not going to happen,” Keith said, grimacing as the pile of salt got higher and higher, spreading further across the table.It was going to be a bitch to clean up, but he was stubborn.

Perhaps not as stubborn as Pidge.“Goddammit, stop.Please.”

“Not the words I’m looking for.”

“I do not have a crush on Lance!”

“No need to yell, Keith,” Pidge said, smiling smugly.

“How could I possibly have a crush on the most irritating person in existence?Because that’s what he is, you know.He’s even more than irritating than you and, right now, that’s saying something.”

Ending the flow of salt, Pidge said, “Fine.Explain Taylor Swift, then.”

Against his will, warmth flooded his cheeks.There was a sharp laugh from Pidge and Keith ignored her, focusing on his task until it was finished.Gathering everything and placing it back in the tub, he went to each table and dropped off a salt and pepper shaker, taking the chairs down before moving to the next one.

As he worked, he silently cursed Pidge.He didn’t have a crush on Lance.There was no way.Sure, he was kind of gorgeous and he had a great laugh, but he was insufferably joyful all the time and talked a lot and sang at godawful times in the morning.

The problem was Keith couldn’t explain Taylor Swift.He really couldn’t.He’d thought no one was going to find out, which had been a stupid assumption Keith began to realize, because he was still catching himself humming it.

Thankfully, not long later, customers began to file in and Keith was quickly distracted, bussing tables and stealing scraps of breakfast food that had fallen to the floor in the kitchen.It saved him from having to eat in the morning before he left for work.It wasn’t technically something he was supposed to do, but Pidge’s father let him do pretty much anything he wanted without too much complaining.

By eleven, the diner was swamped and Keith was on autopilot, doing what he needed to do and hardly thinking about it.Faces and voices washed over him, he turned tables quickly, and with a small break to yawn, he approached a table he’d flipped only a couple of minutes ago, tucking his pen behind his ear.In his customer service voice, he said, “Good morning.What would you all like to drink?”Then he looked up with a polite smile and saw Lance and Hunk grinning up at him.Blinking, Keith swiveled slowly and met eyes with Pidge across the diner.“What the fuck did you do?” he mouthed.

She smiled innocently and mouthed, “Do your job.”

Turning back, he smiled, though he thought it probably came out as a grimace.“Are you going to tell me what you want to drink?”

“Where’s the manager?” Lance asked.“I’d like to lodge a complaint.”

“About what, exactly?” Keith said.

“How unfairly gorgeous my waiter is.How am I supposed to decide something as critical as what I’d like to drink when those…”Then Lance leaned forward, looking directly into Keith’s eyes.“What color are your eyes?”

“You tell me,” Keith replied.

Lance smirked.“I’m gonna need you to come a little closer.”

Pidge’s voice crept into his mind. _This is flirting._ And he hadn’t even meant to.Keith added accidentally flirting to his list of unexplainable things along with Taylor Swift.It couldn’t be because of a crush.Lance was tearing his napkin into little fucking pieces, for god’s sake, and Keith was going to have to clean his mess up.

“I think you broke him, man,”Hunk said.

“I’m fine,” Keith said immediately.“I have a job to do, so would you please just tell me what you want to drink?”

“Water’s fine with me,” Hunk said.

“Hot chocolate,” Lance said.“And I want lots of whipped cream.”

“Alright.”

“Like, a lot.I think I really need to emphasize that.”

“I got it,” Keith said.“I’ll be right back with those.”

“So professional,” Lance teased.

Rolling his eyes, Keith delivered the hot chocolate order to the kitchen, checked on his other table and then hurried over to Pidge, sliding into the chair opposite her.Raising his eyebrows, he waited.When she didn’t speak, her eyes focused on her computer, Keith said, “You can’t tell me they just walked in here randomly.I could tell they knew I’d be here.How the hell did they know that?”

“I told Hunk,” Pidge said.

“When?Why?”

“Yeah, so, remember when we had dinner with them?”

Keith nodded, waving his hand, asking her to hurry up with the explanation.He had places to be, things to do.

“I got their numbers.Because I liked them.And we talk.And Hunk asked where you worked and I told him because I’m a normal person who can have normal relationships, unlike you.”

“You have Lance’s number?” Keith asked.

Pidge sighed.“You’re lucky I love you, because you are absolutely hopeless.”

“He’s tearing his napkin up into pieces.”

“Uh huh.”

“He can’t even tell what color my eyes are.That doesn’t bode well for his intelligence.”

“Uh huh.” 

Glaring at her, Keith stood and walked back to the kitchen, picking up the hot chocolate.Taking it to Lance, he set it down and then untucked his pen from behind his ear and pulled out his little notepad from the strap of his apron.“What do you want to eat?”

“Can I have the house scramble?” Hunk said.“Actually, can I have two of the house scramble?It sounds good and I’m starving.”

“Sure,” Keith shrugged.“Second one’s on the house.”

“I officially love you,” Hunk declared.

Unsure what to say to that, Keith flicked his gaze to Lance, who was staring down at his hot chocolate with a considering look on his face.When he returned his focus to Keith, he said, “I need more whipped cream, Kogane.”

“Are you serious?”

“Deadly.” 

“There’s more whipped cream there than drink.”

“No there isn’t,” Lance said.Then he grinned.“But that’s exactly what I want!”

“You want me to kill you, don’t you?”

“Hey, there are worse ways to die.”

“I’ll be right back,” Keith said.He went to the kitchen, grabbed the spray can of whipped cream, and then returned, situating it over Lance’s cup and holding the nozzle down with his index finger.Instead of looking at the whipped cream, he was staring straight into Lance’s eyes—which, incidentally, were a stunning dark blue.Keith wish he’d noticed before now, so it didn’t throw him completely off guard.

“That’s enough,” Lance said.

“Are you sure?” Keith asked, not letting up on the nozzle.

“Confident.”

“I’ve still got half a can left here.”

“Half a can, you say?”

Keith nodded, fighting down a smile, wondering when the urge to smile had struck him and where it had come from.Eyes bright, daring, Lance opened his mouth wide and stuck out his tongue.There was a muffled groan coming from Hunk’s direction.

Briefly, Keith considering verifying what Lance wanted, but suddenly the bright pink of Lance’s tongue was distracting and Keith started to spray the whipped cream into his mouth.Anything to cover up that tongue.

Unfortunately, it only got worse.Lance closed his eyes and Keith felt his mouth go dry at the image before him.When the moment arrived that Lance actually had to swallow the whipped cream or start choking, he closed his mouth.Feeling slightly vindictive and definitely alarmed, Keith didn’t let up the flood of whipped cream.Expecting anger, Keith grew even more alarmed when Lance started to laugh, opening his eyes and slapping Keith hard on the arm.Slipping his finger off the nozzle, Keith watched as Lance used his fingers to collect the whipped cream and suck it into his mouth.Floundering for words, Keith ended up saying, “You…is that…enough?”

“Hmm?” Lance asked, still collecting whipped cream.Then, clearly not worried about what Keith had said, he continued by saying, “Did I get it all?”

There was a tiny fleck of whipped cream by the corner of his mouth and another higher on his cheek.With fumbled gestures, Keith pointed to the places he’d missed and Lance followed his directions, but he kept missing the one high on his cheek.Irritation at Lance’s incompetence rose and Keith reached over, swiping his thumb across Lance’s cheek, trying and failing not to notice how smooth the skin was.“Got it,” he mumbled.

“Thanks,” Lance said cheerily.

Keith knew he was blushing.His cheeks were hotter than cheeks ever had a right to be.Turning around, he noticed that a large portion of the customers were busy staring and he swore to himself.

“Mullet head,” Lance sang, “I still need to order food.”

Pinching his nose, Keith pivoted and smiled his fakest smile.“What would you like?”

“French toast.”

“Do you want bacon or sausage with that?”

“Sausage.”

“I’ll go put those orders in,” Keith said, immediately fleeing.After he’d done that, he busied himself with refilling coffee and water and flipping two tables.Once he’d done that, there was a small break in his duties.He went back to the kitchen, ate some scraps that Pidge’s brother, Matt, had saved for him, and found himself dwelling on the pink of Lance’s tongue, the way his cheeks had caved when he’d sucked his finger into his mouth, the deep blue of his eyes, the way he’d laughed when…“Fuck,” Keith murmured to himself.

His phone buzzed in his pocket and he pulled it out to see a text from Pidge.

_P: What was that about not having a crush?_

_K: We are not talking about this_

_P: Not denying it this time, I see._

_P: That was quite the scene.I think only the whole diner noticed._

Debating an answer, Keith was interrupted by Matt declaring Lance’s and Hunk’s orders were ready.Slipping his phone back into his pocket, he put one of the scrambles into the crook of his arm, the can of whipped cream into the other, and carried the other two dishes, using his back to open the kitchen door.

When Hunk saw him, he grinned and rubbed his hands together.As he set down the food, Hunk said, “Thanks, man.Looks great.”

“Sure.”

“Still got that can of whipped cream?” Lance asked.

Soundlessly, Keith removed the can from the crook of his arm and sprayed a spiral on top of Lance’s french toast. 

Immediately, Lance dug in, humming in delight.“You know,” he said, once he’d swallowed, “That was almost nice of you.Having that ready.”

“It’s my job to anticipate the needs of the customers.”

“I’ve got other needs that need anticipating.”

“Lance,” Hunk said, “Leave the guy alone.He’s working.”Smiling at Keith, he said, “Thanks.We’ll eat and then get out of your hair.”

Returning Hunk’s smile, Keith turned away and continued going about his job, relieved that he wouldn’t have to return to Lance’s and Hunk’s table for awhile.

The morning rush ended, though, before they were done, and Keith was suddenly left with very little to do.He wiped down tables and then decided to check on Hunk and Lance for lack of something better to do.“Do you guys need anything else?”

“Nope,” Hunk said.“Tastes great.I would really like to know what went into these hash browns, though, because they are incredible.Any way you could make that happen?”

“I’ll have Pidge text you the recipe sometime.”

“How come you’re nice to him?” Lance asked, pointing at Hunk.“I mean, I’m not going to say I’m cooler, because Hunk is literally the coolest person in existence—gives great hugs—but I’m definitely almost as cool.” 

“He doesn’t make me want to tear my head off.”

“I’ve got a lot of love and joy to share, mullet head.It’s your fault you get so offended by both.”

“There’s no way I’m the only person you irritate.”

Lance’s smile fell slightly and Keith immediately wanted to take back his words.He didn’t, but he hadn’t meant to actually hurt Lance.Judging by the forced shrug, he might’ve done just that.Silence fell between all of them and it was painfully awkward.Desperately wanting to escape, Keith said, “Well, uh, let me know if you need anything.Just wave or something.”Then he hurried away to Pidge’s table.

Slumping into the chair across from her, he groaned.Absolutely no sympathy came from her.She simply typed away and said, “What did you do now?”

“I didn’t do anything.”

“Well, something obviously happened or you wouldn’t be here.”

“Just tell me an insect fact and then leave me alone,” Keith said.

“Dragonflies can fly up to sixty miles per hour.”

“Cool.”

“It is, actually.You don’t sound nearly excited enough,” Pidge said.

The silence lasted for about five seconds and then Keith blurted, “I think I upset Lance.I think I actually upset him.To be honest, I didn’t think it was possible.”

“He is a human being.With emotions.”

“He’s like a ray of sunshine or something.”

“Keith, that’s super gay.”

“That’s not what I…you know what I mean,” Keith mumbled.

“I do, but it’s still gay.”

Glaring at her, Keith leaned back in his seat and glanced back at Lance’s and Hunk’s table to see them in quiet conversation, hardly touching what little food they had left.They were both smiling, though, and Keith was glad for that.

“You know,” Pidge said.“You could just apologize.”

“I guess.”

“God, you’re exhausting.Go bug Matt.”

“What kind of best friend says something like that?” Keith asked.

“This one.”

“Fine.”Standing, Keith noticed that Lance’s plate was actually empty.On the way to the kitchen, he paused at the table and asked if Lance was finished.Lance simply nodded, all effusiveness gone and Keith felt a pang of regret.Scratching the back of his neck, he mumbled, “Hey, I, uh…you’re not that irritating.I mean, you are irritating, but it’s not like…”

“Like what?” Lance asked.

“Like it makes you unlikeable or something.”

Grinning, Lance punched Keith on the arm.“Aw, you like me?”

“That is not what I said,” Keith said in a rush.

“That’s totally what you said.”

“No it…”Bringing his words to a halt before he started another one of their childish arguments, Keith simply picked up the plate and walked back to the kitchen, dumping it by the dishwasher, a young girl who constantly looked on the verge of tears for some reason.Keith hadn’t ever asked.

When he wandered back out, he saw Lance standing on his chair, facing the other customers in the diner, though they were few.Hunk was staring at him with exasperated affection and making absolutely no moves to stop him.In a loud voice, he said, “Good morning, patrons.I would just like to declare that, in a twist _Game of Thrones_ can’t even beat, one Keith Kogane actually likes me.It’s truly a momentous day and if you’d care to toast to it, that would be much appreciated.If not, I hope you have a lovely day anyway.”Then he sat back down, as if he hadn’t just yelled complete nonsense at a bunch of strangers.

“Do you ever shut up?” Keith asked, slapping their bill down on the table.

“Hey, I managed like thirty minutes when we hung out that one time.” 

“Whatever.Just pay the bill and leave.”

“But I don’t want to leave,” Lance pouted.

“And I really don’t care.I have five hours left in my shift today and I already want to bang my head against a wall.” 

“Lance,” Hunk said.“I told you that this might happen, remember?And we both agreed that we’d leave if it upset Keith.So we’re going to leave, because we want Keith to like us someday.”

“But he already likes us.” But when Hunk shot him a look, Lance mellowed and nodded.

Glancing down at the bill, Hunk placed thirty dollars on the table and said, “Keep the change, man.Sorry about the…speech.”

“Did it really upset you?” Lance asked, sidling out of the booth.

“You do realize I work here, right?That I will see a lot of these people again?”

“I mean, yeah.Okay, I can see that.”Looking Keith straight in the eye, Lance said, “I’m sorry, buddy.I can get a little carried away sometimes.”

“No shit.”

“I am sorry.”

And it was so genuine and his face was etched with so much concern, that Keith felt himself soften.“Yeah, alright,” he said.

“Can I irritate you one more time before I leave?”

“It appears you literally live to irritate me, so you might as well.”

“Can I have your number?”

“How many times are you going to ask me that?” Keith asked, his brain unhelpfully reminding him of the original Beauty and the Beast story, where the beast asked Beauty to marry him every night.

“I’ll stop if you give it to me,” Lance grinned.

Laughing shortly, unsure whether he was amused or so irritated that he was beyond proper functioning, Keith held out his hand.Somehow, Lance’s grin grew even larger, and he placed his phone into Keith’s hand.

Starting a new contact, Keith inputed his name and number, saved it, and then returned the phone.“Now, leave.Please god.”

“Leaving,” Hunk said, smiling nervously and tugging on Lance’s arm.

Keith started to work on clearing their table, when a shout rang through the air.“Hey, Kogane!”

Keith whipped around and saw Lance’s head poking through the just open door.“I like the ponytail!”The second the words left his mouth, he was gone, the door swinging shut.

A blush rose in his cheeks and Keith returned to cleaning the table, wiping up a few splatters of whipped cream.Smiling, he started to hum “Out of the Woods” and wondered if Lance was ever going to use the number.

 

When Keith got home from work, Shiro and Allura were curled up on the couch and watching a movie.Trudging over, he sunk onto the couch beside Allura and stared blankly at the screen.It was some romantic comedy, that much was obvious.Shiro loved watching them and Allura loved watching them even more.They were disturbingly good for each other.

“Hello, Keith,” Allura said.

“Hey.”

“Was work alright?”

“Fine,” Keith sighed. 

“You look exhausted.Would you like me to make you some tea?Or some food, perhaps?”

“I’m good, but thanks Allura,” Keith replied with a smile.Despite the constant PDA he had to witness, Keith actually liked Allura, posh British accent and all.Shiro was absolutely smitten with her and for good reason.She was kind and determined and absolutely fucking badass.On top of that, it was obvious how in love with Shiro she was and that was all Keith could ever want for his brother.

“Pidge said Lance and Hunk stopped by,” Shiro said, pausing the movie with the remote.“And that you were humming Taylor Swift.”

“Are you going somewhere with this?”

“I think you know exactly where I’m going with this.”

“In that case, I really don’t want to talk about it,” Keith said.

“I haven’t met Lance yet,” Allura said, smiling at Keith.“What’s he like?Besides the shower singing, obviously.”

“Irritating,”Keith grumbled.

“And?”

“I don’t know.Loud, flirty, ridiculous.Exhausting.”

“That’s how you describe almost everyone,” Shiro said.

“What is with everyone today?” Keith said.“I do not have a crush on him, alright?”

“I wasn’t insinuating you did,” Allura said.

“Yeah, but you two are doing the gang up on Keith thing and get him to talk more than he wants to.I see through both of you.”

“Caught me,” Shiro said, raising his arms. 

“You two finish your movie.I’m going to go read.”

“What are you reading?” Allura asked.

“ _Cat’s Cradle_.”

“Vonnegut,” Allura smiled.“I adore him.I don’t believe I’ve read that one, though.Would you let me read it when you’re done?”

“Sure,” Keith said, before retreating into his bedroom.Putting his phone into his iHome, he played music quietly and picked up his book, sitting on the bed and leaning against the wall as he read.

A pounding on the wall an indeterminate amount of time later made him jump and lose his place.Scanning the page, he found where he’d left off and marked it with his finger, before shouting, “What?”

“So you are home!” 

His music was disturbed by the sound of a text.Keith considered ignoring it, but there was a flutter of excitement in his stomach that Lance was actually texting him.As Keith crossed his room, he added that feeling to his list of unexplainable things.It couldn’t possibly mean anything.Lance had shouted about him to an entire diner, after all.There was nothing remotely likable about that.

But when he glanced down at his phone, he smiled.

_L: It’s Lance :D_

_K: I figured_

_L: Probably because I’m the only person on this planet willing to text you_

_K: Yep.That’s totally why_

_K: Did you want something?_

_L: Nope.Just wanted to make sure you had my number in case you wanted to use it_

_L: It’s highly encouraged you use it btw_

_L: My current theory is that you might be less hostile over text_

_K: A guy can dream, I guess_

_L: You wound me_

_L: I happen to know countless people who would be jealous that you’re getting all of my attention right now_

_K: Uh huh_

_L: Ye of little faith_

_K: Can I ask you a question?_

_L: Of course!Anything ;)_

_K: Why would you think I’d be less hostile when you’re no less dramatic or flirtatious?_

_L: Like you said, a guy can dream_

_L: Although, I don’t know what you’re complaining about.It’s an honor to be flirted with by me.Besides, I know you totally like it_

_K: Oh really_

_L: Dude, you blush on a regular basis.I’m not blind_

_K: I don’t get flirted with often, alright?_

_L: No shit_

_K: Oh fuck off_

_L: It’s kind of adorable, gotta be honest_

_L: It’s like your ponytail.Also adorable, but you don’t really understand how that’s possible because it comes out of a mullet, which is distinctly not adorable_

_K: Right_

_L: Are you blushing right now?_

_K: Nope_

_L: I wish I could believe you.In an absence of evidence, I’m just going to assume you are because I can_

_K: I hate you_

There wasn’t an immediate response after that, so Keith set his phone aside and started to read again.But the longer the silence went on, the more guilt eked it’s way in.It wasn’t like he’d actually meant that.Not really.Sure, he saw Lance as his rival but that didn’t mean he actually had to hate the guy.Right?

Deciding not to dwell on that, Keith typed another message.

_K: I don’t hate you, okay?_

_L: Are you sure?Because, sometimes, I’m not all that sure_

_L: And I don’t really know what I did wrong_

_L: Like, here’s the thing, Keith…I actually like you.I know this might mystify you, because it seems like any basic social interaction mystifies you, but I do actually like you_

_L: And it’d be cool if we could, like, get to know each other a little bit_

_L: Maybe become friends?_

_K: What’s your last name?_

_L: McClain_

_K: Seems a bit premature, McClain_

_L: WHAT DID I DO TO YOUUU_

_K: You mean besides the singing?And the speech today in the diner?_

_L: Yes_

_K: Nothing, I guess_

_L: Let’s all remember when you came to my door and told me to keep singing.And I apologized for the speech.I don’t buy it, man_

_L: I don’t know what your deal is, but it’s not that_

_K: Whatever_

_L: Why did you give me your number today?_

_K: Because I wanted you to stop asking_

_L: Alright_

_L: What can I do to make you give me a chance?_

_K: I’m texting you back, aren’t I?_

_L: Wow, you suck at everything, but I’ll take it_

_L: I have to go help Hunk with something, but we are not done, Kogane_

_L: I’m going to learn the fuck out of you_

_K: Fantastic_

The texts stopped after that, but Keith’s mind was still reeling.He knew he’d been a bit of a dick to Lance, but there was the singing and the speech and his general dramatics and…

And the fact that Keith had a huge fucking crush on him.A crush that terrified the motherfucking hell out of him.

Shiro and Pidge had been right.They usually were.

Most importantly, though, Lance liked him somehow, despite how uncooperative Keith had been.

Rereading the texts they’d exchanged, Keith’s eyes landed on: _I’m going to learn the fuck out of you._ He grinned helplessly at his ceiling.


	4. Chapter Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't got anything new to add. Just went to give a huge thank you to everyone who's reading this and leaving comments and kudos and stuff. I feel so honored  
> And thanks to Camille, the best cheerleader around and the bestest friend a girl could have  
> Enjoy! <3

“Where’s Allura tonight?” Keith asked, helping himself to two of the enchiladas Shiro had made.He checked his pocket for his phone, making sure it was still there for about the fiftieth time today. 

Shiro waited until they were both seated before he replied.“Coran decided to try slam poetry, so he’s at an open mic tonight.Allura went to support him.”

“That guy’s weird,” Keith said.

Shooting him a look, Shiro took a bite of food.Backtracking, Keith said, “There’s nothing wrong with weird, though.I like him alright.”Coran happened to be the only family Allura had left—an uncle, though Shiro had never managed to find out if they were actually related, thinking it rude to ask now after so much time—and Keith rarely got away with insulting anything related to Allura.

“He is a bit strange,” Shiro conceded.“But he’s a good person.On the subject of Allura, I want to run something by you.”

“Shoot.”

“It’s our one year anniversary in a week and I’ve been trying to brainstorm what to do.I was thinking maybe…”

“Okay,” Keith interrupted.“Is this making sure I’m okay with something or is this just bouncing ideas off of me?Because one is a good idea and the other really isn’t.”

“Stretch yourself, Keith.It’ll be good for you.How do you think you’re going to get Lance to feel something for you if you can’t talk about things like this?”

“I knew I would regret panicking to you,” Keith sighed.

“Did I tell you how cute that was?It’s been a long time since you’ve come running into my room that late at night.”

“And I’m pretty sure I told you to forget that happened on pain of death.”

“I’m terrified.”

Sighing, Keith took a bite of enchilada, which was infuriatingly good.Instead of swearing at Shiro like he’d intended on doing, he softened slightly.“You’re unbelievably irritating.” 

“I’ll take that as a compliment.Now, back to Allura.Do you think she would prefer something really romantic or something more action packed?I’ve been planning a candlelit dinner for a long time, but now I’m wondering if it would be better to take her out dancing.Or to an arcade.Or…”

“She loves romantic,” Keith said.“You’re thinking about it too hard.”

“Was that meant to make me feel better?”

“No.”

“Good, because it didn’t,” Shiro said.“I just want her to know how much she matters, you know?And I’m worried I won’t do it right.”

“She already knows, idiot.Just do whatever you’ve been planning for ages.She’ll love it,” Keith said, shaking his head and smiling despite himself.The truth was, he kind of liked it when Shiro was like this.It reminded Keith he was human.

“You think so?”

“God, please just talk about your goddamn thesis or something.”

“You hate it when I talk about my thesis.”

“It’s better than this,” Keith said.“Just…is it going alright?”

“I think so.I’ve still got a couple more weeks until I’m in crunch mode.I’ll be working through the night more than a few times, I’m sure.”

“That’s not anything different.”

“True,” Shiro sighed.

“Let me know if you need help with anything, okay?I don’t want you to run yourself into the ground.”

“I’ll let you know.”

Keith nodded, satisfied, and pulled his phone from his pocket, setting it on the table.Touching the home button, the screen lit up to show that there were no new texts. 

“Has he not texted?” Shiro asked.

“No,” Keith sighed.“Not once all day.”

Looking over, he saw Shiro grinning and Keith realized all that he’d admitted by answering a rather simple question.It was unfortunate, but he had been in Shiro’s room last night asking a lot of embarrassing questions about handling a crush you didn’t want to have, so it was probably a lost cause.“You could text him, you know,” Shiro said.“That’s not against the rules.”

“It’s against my rules.”

“Something tells me you have a lot of those.”

Keith shrugged.“I’ve got a few.”

Shiro laughed, shoving Keith in the shoulder.Laughing too, Keith found himself wondering what exactly Lance was doing as he ate his way through his enchiladas.He was deep into a fantasy wherein Lance was pestering Hunk endlessly about what exactly he should text to Keith, when Keith realized what he was doing.Groaning, he said, “I’m gonna go work on my bike tonight.”

“Almost done?”

“So close,” Keith grinned.“So, so close.I’ll be able to ride her soon.”

“After you…” 

“After I get her checked and registered, yes.”

“Good.”

“Which reminds me, are you sure you don’t want me to help cover the insurance, because…”

Shiro held up his hand, stopping Keith.“I’ve got the insurance.As long as you’re living under my roof, I’m taking care of you.”

“Thanks, Shiro.”

“It’s my job, but you’re welcome.”

It really wasn’t his job, but Keith was pretty sure Shiro would ignore him if he said that.Keith knew that a lot of Shiro’s sanity relied on responsibility and routine.A large part of that depended on taking care of Keith and, in all honesty, he wasn’t looking forward to the day he was going to steal that away from Shiro.

Once they were done eating, Keith gathered his things and took off to the garage.When he’d reached street-level and was searching for music, he finally got the text he’d been waiting for for hours.Some of the day.Okay, all of it. 

_L: Remember when I said I wasn’t done with you?That begins now  
L: That’s right, my man, we’re gonna play twenty questions_

_L: Prepare yourself_

_K: I’m going out_

_L: GOING OUT?UNACCEPTABLE_

_L: I’ve been waiting for this all day.It’s my reward.Are you seriously going to deny me my reward, Kogane?_

_K: Reward for what?_

_L: Homework.I’ve been doing it alllllll day and I want to die_

_L: Like, I understand why it exists in theory, but also why the fuck does it exist?I don’t deserve it_

_K: Yeah, so…going out_

_L: Fine.I guess I’ll just whine at Hunk.He’ll love it_

Tapping his phone against his leg, Keith considered his options.Obviously, he could let Lance do exactly that and frankly, that was the option that appealed more.But last night, Shiro had told him he was going to have to put in some visible effort, even just to attain friendship.Apparently, it was hard to be friends with someone when you couldn’t tell they actually wanted to be friends.Why that had to be Keith’s problem was beyond him, but…

_K: You could come with me, I guess_

_L: OUT?_

_L: Are you sure about this, mullet head?It sounds suspiciously like hanging out_

_K: Whatever.I’m outside.I’ll wait three minutes and then I’m gone_

Glancing down at his phone, Keith saw it was 7:54.7:57, then.Finding a relatively clean spot on the bottom stair, Keith sat and stared at the sky, the sun close to setting.It was probably going to be a nice sunset.There were already swathes of rose pink.

At 7:56, there was a loud clattering sound behind him and Keith swiveled to see Lance bounding down the stairs, clothes haphazardly thrown on his body.In fact, he didn’t even have one of his arms through his jacket.When he saw Keith, he grinned and said, “You like to make things difficult, don’t you?”

Apparently Lance had to make things difficult, too.Just his presence was borderline too much for Keith to handle.Discovering he had a crush was only making things worse.

“Looks like you made it just fine.”

“Fine?” Lance said, his tone edging towards his typical dramatics.“ _Fine?_ Hunk put my shoes on for me and I’m like ninety percent sure my shirt is inside out, but I can’t be positive because my mom cuts all my tags off, and I can’t feel my left arm because I hit my elbow on a wall running down here.”

“Tragic,” Keith said, heading down the street.

“You’re such an asshole sometimes, you know that?”

“You’re an incurable flirt all the time.Did you know that?” Keith shot back.

“Does that bug you?”

“I…”

There was a momentary silence and then Lance said, “If it bugs you, I won’t do it anymore.Or, well, I’ll try.I’m not perfect, but it’s not like I enjoy making people uncomfortable or anything.I like to think I’m a nice person.I just need people to _tell me_ when they’re uncomfortable.”

“Whatever.It’s fine.”How did Keith always manage to land himself in situations like this?Of course he didn’t want Lance to stop, but he didn’t really want to admit that either.And, sometimes, it did make him uncomfortable, because he didn’t know why Lance was doing it. 

“You _do_ like it.”

“Lance.”

“Right, sorry,” Lance said, speeding up slightly so he could walk beside Keith.Skip, really.He had a sort of odd bounce to his step, probably because his limbs were so long and lanky and out of control.“Are we going back to the garage?” he asked.“This looks vaguely familiar.”

“Yeah.”

“Cool.Can I talk this time?”

“Sure.”

“Really?”

“Don’t make me say yes again,” Keith said, glaring at him.

“Because then the answer’d become no?”

“So you do have a brain.”

“Rude,” Lance said, laughter in his voice.It was strange that Lance was seemingly impervious to all of the glares and blunt comments he received from Keith, especially considering the scene in the diner, when Keith had been sure he’d actually offended Lance.Thinking back, Keith realized he’d been serious when he’d suggested Lance irritated other people as well, but he hadn’t been serious just now.He rarely was.Clearly, Lance was a lot more perceptive than Keith had given him credit for.

“Alright, Kogane,” Lance said, shattering his thoughts.“Are you this quiet around everyone or is it just me?”

“I don’t have anything to say.”

“You’ve said that to me before.”

“I believe that,” Keith said, watching his feet slap against the pavement.

“That’s not very conversational of you.”

“Yeah, I don’t really do conversational.”

“Well, let’s practice then!It’s a good skill to have, you know,” Lance said.

Glancing at Lance, Keith’s lips went into a thin line.It didn’t seem to deter Lance in the slightest.“Alright then, I’ll just talk and you can interject whenever you want.I’m good at talking.”

“You really are.”

“Okay, when I say interject, I don’t mean you should make irritated asides all the time.I’m learning the fuck out of you, remember?That requires interjections that actually have information about you somewhere in there.”

It was unexpected, having Lance bring that up, and so Keith wasn’t prepared to prevent a smile.Suddenly, he was grinning down at his feet and Lance did not miss it.“Is that a smile?Oh my god, you’re actually smiling!It’s a miracle.I wish I had a camera so I could memorialize this moment.”Keith was about to point out he did have a camera on his phone, when Lance’s eyes brightened and he pulled out his phone.“Okay,” he said, unlocking it, “Keep smiling like that, would you?”

“Missed your chance,” Keith said.

“I will get a picture of you smiling.It’s my new mission.”

“Good luck.”

“Thanks, Kogane,” Lance said, bumping against him, propelling them to the edge of the sidewalk.Keith bumped him back so that they migrated back to the middle, but Lance took it as a competition—something Keith really should’ve expected.Their shoulders collided again, harder, and it sent Keith spiraling into the grass beside the sidewalk and almost straight into a tree.Lance started to laugh and Keith came back, ramming him and sending him into the street.Neither of them knew when to quit, but it hardly mattered, because by the time they reached the garage, they were both laughing too hard to do anything besides laugh and press their shoulders together to keep their balance.

The laughter came to an abrupt end, when a bright light flooded Keith’s vision.Lowering his phone, Lance said, “Got it.Told you I would.This has been a very successful night.Not only did I complete my mission, but I’ve learned that Keith Kogane can smile and laugh.It’s like he’s human!”

“Fuck off,” Keith grumbled, walking up to the garage and unlocking it.Focusing on the padlock was the distraction he needed from Lance and his sparkling eyes, bright laughter, and careless smile.As Keith stared at his bike and made a plan for what he was going to get done tonight, he spent more time wondering how people did this.How did people spend time around a crush and not combust?Because Keith felt very close to combustion and all they’d done was laugh together.

“You’re gonna take me on a ride, right?When it’s done?” Lance said.

“I hadn’t planned on it, no.”

“Ugh, fine, I’ll rephrase.Will you take me on a ride when it’s done?”

“If you want,” Keith shrugged, settling into his work.“I drive fast.”He smirked when he said that and was unable to prevent himself from looking at Lance, who had a very odd expression on his face.If only Keith knew what it meant.

“I can do fast.”

“I’m not convinced.”

“I can,” Lance insisted, a light flush high in his cheeks.

“If you say so,” Keith said, trying not to laugh. 

A long, comfortable silence followed, the only sounds the clack of metal and the sweet-smelling spring wind blowing into the garage.As expected, Lance got fidgety, but instead of talking, he started wandering around the garage and looking at the tools hanging on the wall and the old car parked on the other side, covered with a sheet.“Does the guy you rent this from ever come in here?” Lance asked, wiping a finger across a counter in the back, his finger coming away practically black from the dust.

“No.I’ve seen him a total of twice in my life.”

“That’s so weird.I wonder if he’s a serial killer like in _Disturbia_.That would be…actually, no, I’m not going to think about that.”

“Do you consume any culture that isn’t crappy?”

“ _Disturbia_ is a great movie!”

“It’s really not.”

“Well Pidge told me you like Journey, so…ha.”

Pausing in his work, Keith vowed to murder his best friend.He would do it nicely and quickly of course, but that was about all the courtesy she deserved.“Why on earth were the two of you discussing my music taste?” 

“I wanted to see if I could find a song to sing that you actually liked.”

“Oh.”

Deliberately, Lance walked back to the motorcycle and settled down beside Keith, echoing how they’d sat together when they’d been here a couple weeks ago.Bumping his shoulder against Keith’s thigh, Lance asked, “So what is your favorite song, mullet head?”

“Changes.”

Lance rolled his eyes.“Right now, then, idiot.”

Setting down his tools, Keith took his phone out of his jacket’s pocket, headphones falling out with it, and scrolled through his music.Beside him, Lance extended his neck and peered over Keith’s leg to see what he was doing.It was unsettling enough that Keith used his knee to smack him lightly in the jaw.Pouting, Lance waited, jiggling his knee and tapping two of his fingers against his collarbone.Presumably so he could feel the collarbone more firmly beneath his fingers, Lance had pushed his t-shirt aside unthinkingly and Keith found himself looking more often than he should’ve.He didn’t even typically notice other people’s collarbones.He was actually going insane.

“Do you even know your favorite song?” Lance whined.

“Shut up,” Keith mumbled, finally focusing long enough to reach Nirvana.Clicking on them, he scrolled through the songs until he found “Where Did You Sleep Last Night” from the band’s MTV Unplugged performance.Handing the headphones to Lance, Keith pressed play, practically hearing the forceful strums of guitar that started off the song.

Suddenly and absolutely desperate for Lance to like it, Keith went back to his bike to distract himself.It half worked.Keith did keep sneaking glances, but he managed not to say anything.

When the song ended, Lance handed the headphones back and said, “What the fuck does that even mean?”

“Who cares?”

“I don’t know, I kind of care.I did just spend five minutes of my life listening to that song, which was super depressing by the way.Like, seriously?Some guy’s head was found in a driver’s wheel but they couldn’t find his body?What the hell?”

“It’s about the feeling.”

“Oh, is it?” Lance said, grinning.“So you feel things then?”

“Why do I even bother?”

“So what does it make you feel, Kogane?Color me curious.”

“I’m afraid feelings are friendship level five,” Keith said.

“What level am I at?”

“One.”

“Nice!” Lance said, whooping.He was a millisecond from asking what exactly Lance was so thrilled about, when he thought better of it.Lance would probably tell him anyway.

“So, what kind of privileges does being a level one friend get me?” Lance asked, still visibly excited.Mystifyingly.Not that Keith actually had friendship levels, but there was no way to construe level one as anything particularly positive, especially considering they’d hung out more than a few times.

“My presence.Occasionally.”

“Sweet.So I can, like, ask you to things?”

“I guess.”

“Awesome, because Hunk wants you and Shiro to come over for dinner sometime next week and I’ve been holding off asking you because I was kind of sure you’d say no and I really want you to say yes.But since we’re _friends_ …”

Ah.That’s why he was excited.Frankly, Keith had kind of thought that was already a given.Did Lance think he did this with just anybody?Some stranger off the street?

“Yeah, alright.”

“Wait, are you serious?”

“Do I look like I’m joking?” Keith asked.

“Wow, I totally didn’t expect that, I gotta be real.Hunk’s gonna be shocked, too.”Then Lance swore.“Would Pidge kill me if I paid her in coins?”

“Yes.”Then, after a pause, Keith asked, “Why are you paying her?”

“We had a bet going about whether you’d say yes or not and she was firmly in the yes category.I don’t know why we bet against her in the first place, considering she probably has insider information, but Hunk and I really couldn’t see a universe where you said yes, because you know, you’re kind of…” Lance waved his arms extravagantly. 

“Right.Well, would you prefer me to say no?Because I can.I have no issue doing that.”

“No!No.I definitely want you to come.”

“Okay.”

“Okay,” Lance grinned.Then, slapping Keith’s arm over and over again, “Hey, _Fault in Our Stars_.Can okay be our always, Keith?”

“No.”

“Ooh, what about no?Can I interpret all of your no’s as displays of affection?”

“No.”

“Awww, Keith,” Lance said, placing a hand over his heart.

Closing his eyes, Keith wondered how he could have a crush on someone so fucking irritating, how two words could be both endearing and worthy of homicide.He wasn’t going to say anything in reply, but then he made the mistake of looking at Lance, who winked.The smile he’d managed to stow away came out in full force and Lance grinned back.His smile was electric and bright and reminded Keith of summer nights filled with fireflies. 

Time was simply a notion and by the time Keith looked away, all he knew is that he’d stared too long.But so had Lance.Whatever that meant.

Surprisingly, though, it didn’t get awkward.The two of them just fell into silence and Lance watched Keith work.When Keith decided he’d had enough for the night, he cleaned up, turned off the light and locked the garage up, Lance following him and humming to himself.Keith considered getting offended, but he was humming “Where Did You Sleep Last Night”.It was impressive, really.It did explain, though, how he knew every lyric to every goddamn pop song on the planet.He clearly picked up songs easily.

As they started back home, Lance said, “Alright, what’s the sappiest song you own?Besides “Faithfully”, obviously.”

Pausing, Keith took his phone back out and extended one headphone to Lance.There was a part of him screaming that this was too much, he was sharing more than he wanted, but a much larger part didn’t want the night to end, because when it did, he and Lance would be in separate places.Back into his artists he went, this time clicking on Iron  & Wine and playing, “The Sea and the Rhythm”.Then he put the other headphone in his ear and they kept walking, very close together, their shoulders and the backs of their hands constantly bumping.

The soft strums of guitar and the breathy voice of Sam Beam started and Keith felt himself relax.Iron & Wine had that effect on him.They were the band he listened to when he couldn’t get his mind to stop late at night.

Halfway through the song, Lance whispered, “What’s this one about?”

“Sex,” Keith said, the word heavy on his tongue.

“Huh,” Lance replied, considering that for a moment.“It’s a lot less in your face than the songs I listen to.”

“Go figure.”

“Well, I’m…”

“Lance,” Keith said pointedly.

“Right,” Lance mumbled.“Waiting until the end of the song.”

It was quiet and unassuming all the way through and when it ended, the peace Keith felt lingered.It was a lot like the thin gossamer thread that was this night.Everything could snap so easily, but it hadn’t yet and Keith desperately didn’t want it too.Unfortunately, he had no idea how to verbalize that to Lance.Apparently Shiro was right.As usual.Talking about…feelings took practice. 

When the song ended, Lance took the headphone from his ear, separating from Keith slightly, and said, “Alright, I’m impressed.”

“With the song?”

“I mean, sure.But I was actually talking about you.I was expecting your sappiest song to be “I Will Follow You Into the Dark” or something, which, while technically sappy, is still super emo.But that was just…that was _romantic_ , mullet head.Trying to seduce me?”

“Did it work?”

At that, Lance flushed, hard enough that Keith could tell in the muted light from the street lamps.He laughed a little too loudly and Keith knew he just had take that and push on it.“So the flirtee can’t be flirted with.Interesting.”

“Did you just admit to flirting?”

Now Keith was speechless.That had not gone how he’d intended it to go.

The silence that followed was tense and Keith was searching desperately for something to say, when he saw their apartment building rise above him and he breathed a sigh of relief.The gossamer thread had definitely snapped and now he just wanted to run.

The silence lasted all the way to Lance’s door, where they both stopped walking.With a soft smile, one Keith didn’t know Lance possessed, assuming he was only capable of large and grandiose gestures, Lance said, “Thanks for letting me come with you.”

“Yeah.”

Lance glanced over at the door, tapping his finger against his thigh.“Do you…do you want to come in?It’s still pretty early and we have cookies.Milk.Hunk makes some really good cookies.Like, to die for.Seriously.”

“I’m, uh…”

“Oh, yeah, totally.You, uh…”

Keith bit his lip to hide a smile and started to back away towards his door.“I’ll ask Shiro about the dinner and let you know.”

“Okay, cool.Wednesday or Thursday is probably best for us, but I’m sure was can rearrange some things and…”

“Lance.”

“What?”

“We’ll figure something out, okay?I’ll make sure it happens.”

“Good,” Lance said firmly.“Good, good.”

“Good,” Keith echoed, laughing softly. 

He’d finally reached his door and as he extended a hand to the knob, Lance said, “Goodnight, Keith.” 

“Night, Lance.”

“I might text you.”

“Whatever.”

“How often do you say that a day?” Lance asked.

Keith shrugged, opening his front door.“You’re going to have to count sometime.”

“That would require having you around for an entire day.”

“It would.”

“We’ll have to make that happen sometime.For science, you know,” Lance said.

“We could…yeah,” Keith managed, wondering if he was reading too much into this conversation, too much into this night.He thought maybe he wasn’t and that was something he was going to have to deal with while lying awake later.Before Lance could say anything else, Keith stepped into his apartment, and shut the door, leaning against it briefly and shutting his eyes.

“Well, on the bright side, that wasn’t screaming,” Shiro said, jolting Keith away from the door.

“Jesus, Shiro,” Keith sighed.

“In fact, it sounds like the two of you are getting along.”

Keith winced and headed for his room.Laughing, Shiro called after him, “I can’t believe I’m going to get to watch my little brother fall in love with the boy next door.”

“Ugh,” Keith groaned, shutting his door and flinging himself onto his bed.As he laid there, staring at the ceiling, he realized he hadn’t asked Shiro about the dinner.“Fuck,” Keith mumbled, standing and heading back into the living room, where Shiro was pouring over a book and making notes in the margin.

When he heard Keith’s footsteps, he glanced up and said, “I didn’t expect to see you again tonight.”

“Hunk and Lance want us to go over for dinner sometime next week.I said I’d ask.”

Putting down his pen, Shiro leaned back in his chair and thought.“Wednesday?I can do Wednesday.Can I bring Allura?”

“I’ll ask.”

“Thanks.”

“Sure,” Keith sighed, sitting down on the opposite side of the table from Shiro.Then he texted Lance.

_K: Shiro says he can do wednesday…wants to bring his girlfriend_

_L: Wednesday it is!And she is more than welcome.Seriously, the more the merrier.Invite Pidge, too_

_L: Actually, never mind, I think Hunk already did that_

_K: Of course he did_

_L: Jealous, Kogane?Think we’re gonna steal your best friend away?We are pretty cool_

_K: I’m not worried_

Setting down his phone, Keith said, “Wednesday works and you can bring Allura.”

“Great.She’ll love meeting everybody.”

“I’m sure she will.”

“You alright, Keith?” Shiro asked, automatically sensing the shift in Keith’s mood.

“Fine.”

“For the record, I don’t believe you.”

“I know.”

Nodding, Shiro went back to his book, likely some research for his thesis, and Keith watched him for a moment, wondering not for the first time if this kind of studiousness was something he would’ve enjoyed.Whether it was or not, it didn’t change the fact that Keith wished that was something he could’ve found out.

His phone clacked against the table as a new text came in, startling Shiro slightly.Noises tended to do that, especially when he was focused on a task.Apologizing softly, Keith returned to his bedroom.

_L: We still need to play twenty questions_

_K: You can have one_

_L: THAT’S IT???_

_K: For now_

_L: Well, shit, alright.Now I have to come up with a really good one_

_L: Got it_

_L: Would you rather be ugly and live forever or be attractive and live for a year?_

_K: That’s your really good question?_

_L: Yep_

_K: That’s a terrible question_

_L: No one asked you_

_K: Can’t I just stay the way I am?_

_L: NO.That is not in the spirit of the game_

_K: Attractive then.I don’t want to live forever_

_L: Yeah, okay, I could’ve predicted that, what with all your emo music_

_L: I’d pick attractive, too, though_

_K: Why?_

_L: Because I’m incredibly attractive now and I’m not sure I could adjust my life style.Just imagining a world where my face and my flirtations aren’t appreciated makes me shudder_

_K: And with that, I’m off to bed_

_L: It’s literally nine_

_K: 9:32, actually_

_L: THAT’S SO GODDAMN EARLY_

_K: Fine.I’m ignoring you.Satisfied?_

_L: Yes_

Leaving his conversation with Lance, he went to Pidge’s and texted her.

_K: Lance and Hunk aren’t going to steal you away from me, right?_

The response was almost immediate.She was rarely far from her phone.

_P: That’s not even how it works, Keith_

_K: ?_

_P: No.Of course not.Jesus.You’re my best friend and you’ll always be my best friend.Alright?_

_K: Okay.Good._

_P: I’ll see you tomorrow, knuckle head_

_K: Yeah_

_K: You coming to the dinner on wednesday?_

_P: Yep_

_P: Can I go now?I was about to beat a boss_

_K:Yeah.Smash him_

_P: I’m all over it_

Grabbing his laptop from the floor by his bed, Keith pulled up Netflix and searched for something to watch.It was largely fruitless—he’d seen everything he wanted to see—and he ended up closing the tab and staring mindlessly at his desktop, a picture of the Horsehead Nebula.When that got boring, he moved to his Vonnegut book, only to get stuck reading the same sentence over and over again, because he was too busy thinking about Lance and his smile.

Beside him, his phone buzzed.He ignored it.

Five minutes later, there was a pounding on his wall.“Keith,” Lance shouted, “look at your phone.”

“Can’t Hunk entertain you?”

“I’d rather have you entertain me,” Lance said.

Feeling a flutter in his stomach at those words, Keith grudgingly picked up his phone.

_L: I lied.That wasn’t satisfying.Why do you want to ignore me?Is it something I did?_

_L: Okay, it’s always something I did and I’ll just apologize now for whatever it was_

_K: No.It wasn’t you_

_L: It was you?_

_K: Yep_

_L: Classic_

_K: Huh?_

_L: Oh, you know, that was how an ex-girlfriend of mine broke up with me.Couldn’t take all my charm, apparently.I mean, who can?I can be overwhelmingly seductive_

_K: Ugh_

_K: It was actually me, Lance.I took a joke you made too far, alright?_

_L: Psh I knew that_

_K: Sure_

_K: I’m going to do something else now.That won’t offend you, will it?_

_L: Ah, no.Sorry if I overreacted or something_

_K: Night, Lance_

_L: I’ll wake you up with something good_

_K: I look forward to it_

_L: Really?_

_K: No_

_L: Are you sure?_

_K: No_

_L: We’re making progress, Kogane.We’re making progress_


	5. Chapter Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've got nothing exciting at all, but thank you for all the kudos and comments. It's always reassuring and validating  
> And thank you to Camille, a beautiful star whom I love   
> Enjoy! <3

“What number shirt is that, Allura?” Pidge asked, watching Keith come out of his room for the fifth time, wearing a t-shirt that was a slightly lighter shade of black.

“Five, I believe,” Allura said, managing not to laugh but looking as though she desperately wanted to.Pidge on the other hand started laughing hysterically the minute Keith glared at her.

“I liked the darker black better,” Shiro said, looking up from the newspaper he was reading.They were all waiting on Keith to walk next door.Keith hated being the center of attention, the one everyone was waiting on, but his shirt mattered.At least, that was what he kept deciding every time he checked himself out in the mirror.

“Fuck you,” Keith said without any heat.

“Can we please go?” Pidge whined.“If we wait any longer, you might start trying shirts on that have actual color.”

Everyone pretended to shudder.

“Fine.Let’s go.”

“Are you sure?” Shiro said.“I know for a fact you haven’t tried on every black shirt you own.There might be a better one stuffed deep in a drawer somwhere.”

“There is that absolutely fetching one with the slightly longer sleeves,” Allura said.

“Oh for…”Keith didn’t even finish the thought, heading for the door of the apartment and leaving.Pealing laughter followed him and he tried to not let it get to him.It helped that when he knocked on the door it was opened within seconds, Lance standing there with the biggest smile on his face.

“Still wearing black, I see,” Lance said in lieu of a proper greeting.He was leaning against the doorjamb, his arms crossed, and Keith felt a strange urge to kiss the smirk from his face.

“Don’t,” Keith said, using his shoulder to shove past Lance and into the apartment.

“Where’s everyone else?” Lance asked from behind him.

“They’re coming.” 

Glancing around the apartment, Keith was surprised how much he liked it.It was cluttered with textbooks and dishes, but it was also a well-loved space, couches threadbare, candles half-used, and empty bottles of alcohol waiting to be recycled on top of the fridge. 

There was also lots of color, from the tapestries and art hanging on the walls to the cheap Target rugs.In a lot of ways, it felt exactly like Hunk and Lance.Warm, open, and celebratory.

Hunk was in the kitchen, cooking away, and there appeared to be some sort of buffet style set-up on the counter.When he noticed Keith, he waved, pointing to the hand-held mixer he was using as an explanation for not giving a proper greeting.

“Are you sure they’re coming?” Lance called.He’d left the door open, but no one was wandering through.

“Yeah.”

“Why didn’t you wait for them?”

“They were being irritating.”

“Are you telling me everyone irritates you?That would explain a lot _and_ make me feel better.”

“You’re the most irritating,” Keith said.

“Rude,” Lance said, coming up beside him and nudging him with his shoulder.Glancing over at him, Keith noticed he didn’t look at all offended this time.In fact, he was still smiling, blue eyes sparkling.In that second, Keith knew Lance had been looking forward to this and it was entirely possible it was because of him.Maybe he hadn’t been crazy.Maybe there really had been something between them on Sunday night.

Keith opened his mouth to say something—he wasn’t sure what, honestly—when Shiro, Allura, and Pidge all walked in, babbling about something between them.They automatically caught Lance’s attention and he hurried over, saying hello.Keith turned to watch as they all exchanged greetings and Shiro introduced Allura.

And that was the moment when it all collapsed in on Keith.Lance started to flirt with Allura in the exact same way he flirted with Keith, light touches and cheesy one liners.It was disappointing but Keith supposed it did explain why Lance flirted with him, a emotionally constipated guy with a mullet.

Allura seemed surprised, but then she waved the compliments away with ease, while putting Lance in his place at the same time.Keith listened as Lance apologized to both Shiro and Allura, saying that Allura’s beauty had stolen his common sense for a moment.

Suddenly, Keith wanted to be literally anywhere else.Knowing he couldn’t very well abandon the dinner party, though, Keith wandered into the kitchen and joined Hunk, stealing a chunk of chicken and popping into his mouth.

“Hey, Keith,” Hunk said. 

“Hey.”

“There’s more chicken where that came from.Feel free to eat as much as you want.”

“Thanks,” Keith said, grabbing another one and staring at Lance, rethinking every interaction they’d ever had.It was fine, though.Crushes were crushes.He could get over it and he could definitely suffer through it in silence.

He could feel Hunk staring at him.Clearly, his eyes had followed Keith’s stare, because he said, “Wow, is that Shiro’s girlfriend?”

“Yeah.”

“They are seriously supernatural.It’s almost bizarre.”

“Tell me about it.”

“How’d they meet?” Hunk asked.

“At the gym,” Keith said.“She needed someone to spot her and he did.That was a couple years ago.They started going to the gym together and then after a year, Shiro finally got over himself and asked her out.”

“People go to the gym?”

Keith snorted, glancing at Hunk, who smiled.It was pleasantly surprising that this conversation was actually a comfortable one.They’d only talked a handful of times, but there was something about Hunk that instantly relaxed Keith.“How did you learn to cook?” Keith asked.

“My dad, mostly.I’ve taken some lessons, too.I just love it, you know?I got lucky and found my passion.”

“Yeah, I haven’t found that.”

“You’re building a motorcycle, right?Sounds kind of like a passion.”

“Lance told you that?”

“Yep,” Hunk said, chopping through some basil in a blur.“He thinks it’s the coolest thing, actually.I kind of have to agree with him.Must take a lot of time and money.”

“Yeah.Most of the money I make, actually.”

“I think that qualifies as a passion.”

“A super useful one, too,” Keith grumbled.

“I’m not ever going to make anything off cooking, man.”

“At least you can eat it.”

“At least you can ride your motorcycle,” Hunk said, making it sound as though entertainment was on equal standing with food.It wasn’t a way Keith had ever approached it before and he smiled despite himself.

“You’re alright,” Keith said.

“Don’t let Lance hear you say that.He’ll get jealous.”

“That’d be too bad.”

“You do actually like him, right?Because he really wants you to and I might go insane if you don’t.”

Shrugging, Keith felt himself draw back into himself.Stealing another piece of chicken, he stepped away from the counter and headed into the living room, grabbing a seat on the couch.It was insanely comfortable.He decided then he wasn’t going to leave this spot until dinner was ready.Pulling out his phone, he started to play Candy Crush.

“Watcha playing?” Lance asked, crashing down beside him, shoulder bumping harshly into his.

Dislodging himself and creating some distance, Keith said, “Candy Crush.”Then he kept playing.It was easy to distract himself with this.He’d been working on this level for months and he was determined to beat it.

“Cool, cool.Can I watch?”

Flicking his eyes towards Lance, seeing a helplessly hopeful expression on his face, Keith said, “Are you going to try and tell what moves would’ve been better?”

“No?”

“No.”

“Keith,” Lance whined.“What if I promised to try not to?”

“No.”

“Fun-killer.”

Keith didn’t respond and Lance had clearly expected him to, because he bumped their shoulders together and asked if Keith was alright.“Fine,” Keith said in reply, not meeting his eyes.Distantly, he knew he shouldn’t be taking his disappointment out on Lance, especially since it was a disappointment he’d seen coming, but it wasn’t in Keith to be the bigger person.Particularly when Lance was involved.

As expected, Lance deserted the couch, finding someone more suited to entertain him.Taking a deep breath, Keith tried not to let it sting.It wasn’t as though he’d been welcoming.

“Hey,” Hunk called.“Eat my food and weep.”

“Fuck yeah!” Lance declared, his voice ringing through the apartment.Laughter followed his statement.Keith kept his eyes glued to his phone, only looking up when he’d lost the level.Again.It felt like a metaphor for his life.

Pidge and Shiro were the only ones left in the kitchen.Everyone else was heading straight for Keith, looking for a place to crash in the living room.There was a table but it wouldn’t fit all of them.Sighing, Keith stood and headed to the kitchen, picking up a white ceramic plate with a large sun in the center.There was chicken, hand-made rolls with something green in them, mashed potatoes, green beans that actually looked edible, and cookies.How Hunk had done all of this by himself was beyond him, but he was definitely grateful. 

Helping himself to a large portion of mashed potatoes, Keith saw Pidge sidling up to him from the corner of his eye.“What?” he mumbled, adding another scoop for the hell of it.There was enough to go around.

“You weren’t miserable when we left,” Pidge said.

“I’m fine.”

“You should tattoo those words on your forehead and save people the trouble.”

“Maybe I will.”

“It has to be about…oh.Allura,” Pidge said knowledgeably.“Keith, I’m sure Lance…”

“It’s fine,” Keith interrupted, taking two rolls and some chicken.“It actually saves me a lot of trouble.”

“God, you’re so…”

“Pidge.Leave it.”

“Don’t snap at me because you’re hurt.”

Rolling his eyes, Keith spooned some of the green beans on his plate and said, “I’m not hurt.Since when do hurt and fine mean the same thing?”Then he left her behind in the kitchen, sitting down on the floor in the corner of the living room, close enough to the others that he couldn’t be accused of being anti-social, but far enough away that he was unapproachable.

Unless, of course, you were Lance, apparently, who didn’t seem to get the message.

“Hey, mullet-head, why don’t you come sit next to me?It looks lonely over there.”

“I happen to like lonely,” Keith said, taking a bite of the mashed potatoes.God, they were divine.Finding Hunk, Keith smiled at him.“These are really good.”

“Thanks, man.”

Everyone chimed in with compliments and Hunk accepted all of them graciously and with a humble smile.Then Lance started peppering Shiro and Allura with questions.It was perfect, really.Keith knew all there was to know about them.He could zone out, enjoy the food, and try a find a way to make it through this night without ruining everything he and Lance had managed to build.He was aware he was being ridiculous.There was no obligation between them, but Keith had really thought that maybe…

But clearly not.It had always been possible Lance just flirted with everyone.He certainly had the personality and now Keith had been proven right.He’d just been another person to flirt with.It didn’t change the fact, though, that Lance did seem to like him and Keith knew he would rather be his friend than not.It meant he was stupid and masochistic, but that wasn’t really a revelation. 

Keith _was_ fine.At least he wasn’t in love or something.As long as he avoided that, he would be fine.Crushes could be quashed.Flirtation could be avoided.It was going to be fine.

When he came back to awareness, the conversation had delved into space and aliens somehow.That and Shiro was watching him.Catching his eye, Shiro mouthed, “Okay?”

Keith nodded.

“…necessarily look anything like us,” Pidge was saying.“It’s possible they won’t even be carbon-based.While it is true that carbon-based life forms are all that exist on earth, that doesn’t actually establish a rule for the universe.It’s endless, for god’s sake.Humans are arrogant dickheads.Where’s the imagination?”

“Earth is all we have to draw from, though,” Shiro said.

“Imagination, Shiro,” Keith teased.

“Maybe when I finish my thesis, I’ll have time for that again.”

“What’s your thesis about?” Hunk asked.

Sighing, Keith stood and gathered some of the other clean plates, taking them into the kitchen.As far as Keith was concerned, he never needed to hear about Shiro’s thesis again in his entire life.

Remembering that Lance had helped wash dishes when he’d been over, Keith began to wash these, taking his time, letting the warmth of the water soak into his bones.

“Maybe you should wash dishes for a living.You seem to like it,” a voice—Lance’s voice—said. 

Startling, Keith dropped the dish he was cleaning into the sink.Thankfully, it didn’t break.“Jesus, Lance.”

“Sorry.I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“It’s fine.”

“Where’ve you been all night?Got some elaborate fantasy in that head of yours that’s better than real life?I’d better feature in it, because I make everything better.”

“I’ve been here,” Keith said.

“Nah, you haven’t.”

“I totally have.”

Surprisingly, Lance didn’t fire back.Instead, he leaned up against the counter beside the sink, watching Keith’s face as though it would answer all of his questions.Keith happened to know it wouldn’t.“Stop staring at me,” he mumbled, adding another dish to the dishwasher.

“Why?You’re nice to stare at.”

The comment sent a spike of irritation rushing through Keith and before he even thought about what he was saying, the word ‘don’t’ fell out.

“Oh,” Lance said.“Okay.” 

Sneaking a glance at him, Keith noticed that he was fidgeting.He’d seen Lance fidget before, but it was nothing like this.Fingers were tapping, they were doing and undoing buttons, they were sweeping through hair that wasn’t meant to be swept through—there simply wasn’t enough of it for that.It was awful, but Keith wasn’t going to apologize.He’d meant it.“Hand me that knife?” he said, trying to bridge the gap.

“Sure,” Lance said, voice distant.He handed over a spoon.Keith wasn’t entirely sure it was dirty, but he washed it anyway.

“You handed me a spoon, Lance.”

“Oh, sorry.Here,” Lance replied, giving him the knife this time.

“Seriously?”

“What?”

“That was my way of asking if you were alright.”

“Could’ve just asked,” Lance mumbled.Then he brightened, though it felt forced, and said, “Don’t worry about me.I was just thinking.You know how it is.”

“Right.”

“Want me to bring you the rest of the dishes?”

“Sure.Thanks.”

Nodding, Lance left.He did bring all of the dishes over and dumped them into the sink, but he didn’t linger once he had.He returned to the others and started up an animated conversation about a terrible Netflix movie he’d watched the night before.

He seemed normal, but Keith didn’t think he was, which was strange.Unless he thought he deserved to flirt with everything that breathed.He would just have to get over that if that was the case.

When he was done with all the dishes, the night had wound down.Pidge looked ready to go and Shiro was leaning against Allura, half asleep.That would happen, sometimes.It usually meant he would actually get some sleep that night, which Allura knew.She was already making her goodbyes, dragging Shiro with her, insisting he needed a bed.

As Allura herded his brother out the door, she said, “I’ll keep the door unlocked, Keith.Come home whenever you’re ready.”

“Okay,” Keith said, smiling.

“I wanted to watch a movie,” Lance complained to Hunk.

“You know I’ll watch something with you, buddy.Can’t really blame the others for wanting to be home.”

“You wanna stay Pidge?”

She shook her head.“Matt’s coming to pick me up.He’ll be here in five minutes.”

“Keith?” Lance said hopefully.

“I…”

Lance hopped off the couch and skipped over to Keith, taking one of his hands and wringing it in both of his.“Please, please, please.I’ll let you pick.Hunk doesn’t want it to be just us tonight.Right Hunk?”

“Right.”

A refusal was on the tip of his tongue, but Lance was so hopeful, like a puppy wanting to play fetch, and his hands were so soft and warm, so Keith agreed to stay instead.Grinning, Lance dragged him over to the couch and sat him down beside Hunk, before plopping down on Keith’s other side.They were all smushed on the couch, but no one seemed to mind besides Keith.He caught Pidge’s eyes and she shook her head at him, indicating that he was entirely on his own.

“Thanks for dinner, guys,” she said.“I’ll see you soon.”

“Bye, Pidge,” Hunk said.

Lance echoed his statement and Keith watched as she stood and walked out of the apartment, leaving him alone with Lance and Hunk and the prospect of a two hour movie with Lance plastered to his side.

A remote landed in his lap and Lance said, “So what are we watching, mullet head?”

Flipping over to Netflix, Keith scrolled down the page, knowing exactly what he was looking for.When he got to action movies, he went through them slowly, reading each blurb, pretending he didn’t know what he was looking for and as expected, it was killing Lance.

“Dude, come on, I know you have something in mind.Hunk, make him tell me what we’re watching.”

“Yeah, I’m not gonna do that.”

_Hot Fuzz_ finally came on the screen and Keith sighed, clicking on it.“We’re watching this.Satisfied?”

“Cool.I’ve never seen it.”

“You’ve never seen it?It’s a cinematic masterpiece.”

“Oh, is it?” Lance grinned.“We’ll see, won’t we?”

“It’s not just me saying that.”

“Uh huh.”

Rolling his eyes, Keith was about to fire back with Rotten Tomato scores and articles he’d read back when he’d found the movie, but Hunk said, “Hey, guys, the movie’s starting.Stop bickering.”

Lance let out a dramatic yelp and started running around the room, flicking off lights and grabbing a bag of potato chips from the kitchen.When he fell back down beside Keith, every inch of their sides was touching and Keith focused on breathing.This was fine.This was totally fine.It was dark and the skin of their arms kept sliding together as Lance munched on potato chips, sending shivers down Keith’s spine, but it was fine.

Halfway through the movie, Keith felt overwhelmed.He hadn’t watched a single second of the movie and it was one of his favorites.Standing abruptly, startling both Hunk and Lance, Keith said, “Bathroom,” then winced at how demanding it sounded.He’d meant it to be a question.

“You can use mine,” Lance said.“My room’s that one there.”His finger pointed to a half open door right behind them.Nodding and smiling in thanks, Keith hurried away, entering Lance’s room and flicking on the lights so he could see where he was going.

There were pictures everywhere.Some were framed, some were hanging from strings by little clothespins, and some were loose, resting on the bedside table.A guitar was on the far wall, clothes littered the floor, the bedsheets were mussed up, pieces of paper were scattered on the desk, and it looked as though there were fairy lights on every wall.

Unable to help himself, Keith picked his way to the desk, glancing down at the framed pictures resting on it.All of them were of people who looked a lot like Lance to varying degrees.They must be his family and god, there were a lot of them.Keith didn’t know whether they were sisters, brothers, or cousins, but they ranged from very small to older than Keith.The ones here had been taken at a celebration of some sort, everyone caught mid-dancing or mid-eating or mid-chatting with a camera pointed in their direction.Keith suspected Lance had taken them.

Lance didn’t just miss his mom.He missed his entire family and he missed them in a way that hurt.The pain was obvious in the sheer number of pictures capturing nothing more than the simple living of life.

It was only when he noticed that the scraps of paper on the desk were all letters that Keith realized he was being kind of creepy.Shaking his head, Keith headed to the bathroom, surprised to find it much cleaner than the bedroom.There were products lined up on the counter against the wall, which explained why Lance’s hands had been so soft.

Since he didn’t need to actually pee, Keith just stared at himself in the mirror and tried to get himself to calm down.“You’re fine,” he mumbled to himself, trying not to think about Lance’s skin or the pictures in his room.But then something caught his attention out of the corner of his eye.It was a piece of paper and it felt extremely out of place here.Lying his fingers on the edge, he spun it towards himself.

It was a list and on top of it was “Faithfully” by Journey, the song Lance had sung this morning.At least fifteen other songs followed and a lot of them were songs he actually knew and liked.

At the very bottom, a note was scrawled.It simply read: _Ask about Led Zeppelin.You can probably swing something by them.Definitely the guitar solos._

“Fuck,” Keith mumbled.He wasn’t okay.There was no way he could make it through another hour, because there was a crush and then there was whatever the fuck Keith was feeling.

Flicking the lights in the bathroom off, flushing the toilet on a last second thought, Keith then wandered back out into Lance’s room in a complete daze.He wasn’t sure what he was going to do or say.

Absentmindedly, he headed for the living room and walked straight into Lance, who’s hands gripped his shoulders and pushed him away so they could look at each other.“Are you alright?” Lance asked, eyes filled with concern.

“Huh?” 

“You’ve just been in here awhile.I thought I’d make sure you were okay.”

“I’m, uh…no.I’m actually not feeling well.”

“Oh, okay.Do you want me to get you some water or…”

“No,” Keith interrupted.“I’m just gonna go home, I think.Thanks for dinner and stuff.”

“Of course!Thanks for coming,” Lance said, following him to the door, reaching for the knob in a rush so he could open the door for Keith.“Text me if you need anything.The sooner you can grace me with your presence again, the better.”

“Thanks, I guess.”

“Sure.”

Pivoting on his foot, Keith started to walk away, but then Lance called his name.“I can avoid singing in the shower tomorrow if you want.If you think you’re going to need the sleep or whatever.”

“I don’t care either way,” Keith said, not looking back as he hurried to his apartment and shut himself inside. 

As he got ready for bed, he wondered how he was going to handle _liking_ Lance, when Lance was determined to be his friend and when he was distinctly interested in flirting with anything and anyone.

When Keith hit the mattress, he knew he wasn’t going to handle it.This was the sort of situation he didn’t deal with, the kind he simply preferred to pretend didn’t exist.

 

Lance didn’t sing in the morning.He didn’t sing for the next three mornings.He did text, though, and Keith ignored every single one.On the second day, Shiro had tried to talk to him about it, Lance obviously texting him, but Keith had avoided the conversation, going to the garage instead.He knew it was shitty, what he was doing, but he was fucking terrified of how he felt about Lance, of being rejected, of losing his goddamn mind and falling in love with someone that wasn’t ever going to like him like that and ignoring Lance was his instinct, his impulse.Because why would Lance like him?Keith had a mullet, he disliked most pop music, he was often rude, they argued all the time, and he couldn’t talk of anything important for any length of time.

Keith just needed a break.Some time to get his shit together.

But, of course, Lance just couldn’t give that to him.

On the fourth day, relatively late at night, there was a knock on the front door.Keith was in his room, reading.Shiro went and answered the door and he didn’t even get a word out before a voice that was definitely Lance’s said, “Where the fuck is he?Also, hi Shiro.Nice to see you.Now, where the fuck is Keith and would you let me kill him?”

“He’s…”

“I know he’s in here because I’ve been spending a kind of crazy amount of time staring out our goddamn peephole, waiting for him to walk by and go somewhere so I can surprise attack him.I realize that makes me sound like a stalker or a psychopath but I don’t care because he’s ignoring me and I don’t know why and I really need to tear his…”

“Keith!” Shiro yelled, interrupting Lance’s rant.“I think it’s time you dealt with this.”

Keith considered closing his bedroom door and locking it, but Shiro was using his serious, I-will-kick-your-ass-if-you-don’t-do-what-I-say voice, so Keith bookmarked his page and walked into the living room, his heart hammering.

The minute Lance saw him, he slipped past Shiro and started bearing down on Keith.Eyes wide, Keith stumbled backwards towards the far wall, wondering that if he slammed hard enough into one of the windows, it would break, and he could fall to his death, avoiding this entire conversation.

“Fuck you,” Lance said, getting into his space. 

Keith did not miss Shiro mumbling, “Well, this sounds familiar.”

“What did I do?” Keith asked, finally standing his ground.Shiro was right.This was familiar.He could yell at Lance.This was the one thing they definitely had in common.

“What did you do? _What did you do?_ Seriously?You’ve ignored me for like ten years and Pidge won’t tell me anything, which is probably your fault, and I didn’t…you left my apartment not feeling well and nobody was fucking telling me if you were alright.Are you alright?”

“I…what?”

“Are you alright, asshole?”

“I’m…I’m fine,” Keith mumbled.

“That would’ve been nice to know,” Lance said, glancing down at Keith’s hands.“Yep, you’ve still got fingers, so you definitely could’ve texted.That’s just great.Do you know how many scenarios I’ve gone through in my head?So goddamn many.Frankly, I wasn’t ruling out death, because I texted you that Beyonce was overrated and you didn’t argue with me, which is dumb, because there is no way in hell Beyonce is overrated.The one thing I can count on is you arguing with me.”

“Well, I’m not dead and Beyonce is overrated.”

Lance just stared at him in complete disbelief.Then, in a more pleading yell, though it was definitely still a yell, Lance said, “Where’d you go, man?”

“Nowhere.I just didn’t have anything to say.”Keith tried not to wince at what came out of his mouth.He really needed to stop saying that.

“Oh my god!” Lance shouted, turning to Shiro.“Can I please throw him off this building?Please?”

“Sure,” Shiro shrugged.

“Seriously, Shiro?” Keith said.

“You are kind of asking for it.”

“Thank you,” Lance said.He didn’t try and drag Keith off to the roof, though.In fact, his anger seemed to melt away.He took a couple steps back, getting out of Keith’s face.“I’m glad you’re alright.I’ll, uh, see you around.”

“That’s it?”

“What do you mean that’s it?”

“That’s all you came here to say?”

“Yeah.Do you have a problem with that?”

“It just seems a little anti-climatic, considering all the drama.”

“All the drama?” Lance said, voice rising again.“That’s hypocritical coming from a guy who stormed over to my apartment to yell about my singing.”

“It was at seven-thirty in the morning!”

“And you ignored me for four days!I thought we were friends, man.Obviously I was wrong.I don’t know what it is you’re hung up on, but if you want me to think it’s the singing, that’s fine.You won’t ever have to listen to me sing again.Promise.”Then Lance turned and walked out of the apartment without a backward glance.All Keith could do was stand and watch and think about that note on the counter of Lance’s bathroom, days and days of songs listed out.

“Well handled,” Shiro said.

“Oh, fuck you.”

“Keith…”

“What?” Keith snapped.

It looked as though Shiro was going to lecture him, but then he decided against that course of action, instead standing and pulling Keith into a hug, murmuring, “What’s this about?”

“It’s nothing,” Keith replied, trying to decide if he needed to get out of this hug or pull Shiro closer.

“That was not nothing.Lance was upset.You’re upset.”

“I don’t know.I don’t…”Keith let out a shuddering breath and wrapped his arms around Shiro.“I really like him.”

“Yeah, I know.I’m not sure he knows, though.”

“I thought, maybe…”

“You thought what?” Shiro asked, voice soft.

“I thought maybe he felt the same way, but then…”

“Allura,” Shiro breathed.“That’s what Pidge was trying to tell me.Keith…”

“Don’t.”

“Lance does like you.Really likes you.From what Hunk has told me, he talks of little else.I think you should talk to him and maybe not yell when you do.”

“I’m going to bed,” Keith sighed, removing himself from Shiro’s arms.

“This isn’t going to go away, Keith.If he matters to you, you’re going to have to apologize and tell him what’s really going on.”

“Yeah,” Keith mumbled, going into his room, shutting the door, and collapsing on his bed.His mind was a broken mosaic of thoughts, all of them warring for prominence.Keith didn’t know what to do.What he did know, though, is that he hadn’t meant for this to happen. 

Sitting in a rush, struck with an idea, Keith grabbed his phone, headphones, a piece of paper, and a pencil.He put on Iron & Wine and then he started to write.


	6. Chapter Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just my usual thank yous. I adore every single one of you who is reading this. It means the world.  
> And, of course, thank you to Camille, who is always a bright spot in my day (will this be getting progressively gayer, you ask? The answer is yes. Definitely)  
> Enjoy! <3

After the morning rush on Saturday, Keith took a break, slumping into the chair across from Pidge.He immediately started babbling about everything that had happened over the week with Lance, alarming her to the point where she actually closed her laptop all the way. 

“…and then he just left,” Keith finished.

“Oh, Keith,” Pidge sighed, looking at him with utter exasperation.“You’re such an idiot.”

Before she could say anything to make him feel worse, Keith commenced with the second part of the story.“I knew I had to apologize, but I…”

“Suck at apologizing, yeah, I know.Continue.”

“So I wrote him a letter.”

“Did you give it to him?” Pidge asked.

Keith dropped his head into his arms and moaned.“No.I can’t give it to him, Pidge.I read it again this morning and it’s horrifying.I tell him I _like_ him.I tell him fucking everything, actually.It was the most embarrassing thing I’ve ever read.”

“Did you throw it away?”

“No.”

“Rip it into shreds?”

“No,” Keith said, growing slightly irritated, because no wasn’t a truthful answer.The truth was worse than not ripping it into shreds.He currently had it in his pocket, folded into a tiny, lopsided square.

“Well, there you go then.”

“What?”

“You’re still considering giving it to him.”When Keith gave her an unconvinced look, she said, “Okay, I admit, that instinct is probably buried very deep inside you, but it’s there.Just get super drunk or something and then slide it under his door.”

“That’s your advice?”

“Well, what else are you going to do?”

“I don’t know,” Keith whined.“That’s what I’m trying to figure out.How do I apologize without admitting anything?Including that I did anything wrong, because he’ll probably hold that over my head for years.”

“Yeah, there’s no avoiding that part.I guess you could try not to admit the crush thing, but he’s going to want to know why you ignored him for four days.”

“I know.”

“You could just tell him you suck at making friends.That’s true enough.”

Keith thought about arguing that, but when Pidge gave him a knowing look, he sighed because it was true.There was a reason Pidge was the only friend he had.“I hate this,” he grumbled instead.

Rolling her eyes, Pidge opened her laptop back up and started typing away.“It’s your own goddamn fault.You made the bed.Time to lie in it.And Keith?”

“Yeah?”

“Sooner would be a lot better than later.”

“Have you talked to him?” Keith whispered.

“Yep.He’s pretending he hates you.Eventually, he’ll convince himself it’s true.”

“Right.”Then, after a long, depressing silence, Keith declared, “I’m going to go find the nearest bridge and jump off it.”He stood, took off his apron, and handed it to Pidge.He only had an hour left in his shift and it would remain slow for most of it, so he didn’t feel terrible for abandoning the two other servers who were here. 

She accepted it easily, putting it on the table beside her computer, and said, “Enjoy dying.”

“Oh, I will.Will you…”

“Yeah, yeah,” she interrupted.“I already texted my dad and Matt.They know you’re leaving.”

“Thanks.”

Heading out of the restaurant, Keith was blasted with mid-afternoon sun.It didn’t take long before he was over-heating, his black tee not helping.It made the decision about where he was walking too easy.

Twenty minutes later, he’d reached the river running through the edge of the city.Stripping off his shirt, he sat in the grass, underneath a tree, and watched as the river sluggishly rolled by.Leaning his head back against the trunk, he debated what he was going to do.

Okay, it wasn’t actually a debate.He was going to have to apologize.He just needed to find the fucking balls to do it.Luckily, he had the time to do just that.

“Hey, Kei…”There was a loud squawking sound that followed and Keith felt his stomach drop.Those were two voices he knew and he couldn’t believe how it was possible to be as wrong as he’d just been.Suddenly, there was no time and he wasn’t ready.Glancing to his left, he saw Hunk and Lance, towels slung over their shoulders and swim trunks on.Lance was wearing sunglasses.Unsurprisingly and adding to Keith’s general misery, Lance looked really good in sunglasses. 

“Why are you here?” Keith blurted loudly, realizing too late that was probably not what he should’ve started with.

Hunk opened his mouth to speak, stepping closer so that he could do so at a normal pitch, but Lance beat him to it.“Do you own this park or something, asshole?” 

In that moment, Keith realized two things.One, mullet-head was a term of affection and two, he missed being called mullet-head.It was much better than asshole.

“No, I…”

“Then you don’t really have a right to ask that, do you?”

In a sudden burst of irritation, Keith sprung to his feet.When he crossed his arms over his chest, he remembered that he wasn’t wearing his shirt.He briefly considered bending down, picking it up, and putting it back on, but he figured that might seem weird.Unfortunately, the sudden realization that he was half-naked prevented him from speaking and Lance pounced on the opportunity.Sort of.

“Got something to say…jumpy?”

“Jumpy?”

“That’s what I said.Did I fucking stutter?”

“What is happening right now?” Keith asked, glancing at Hunk who just sighed, flicking his eyes between the two of them.

Lance was ready to answer, his eyes fiery, but Hunk spoke before he could.“I’m gonna go scout out a place, Lance.Find me when you’re, uh, done.”Then he left.Practically ran.It gave Keith the opportunity he needed.

“I was just surprised to see you here,” he murmured, tightening his arms across his chest and looking down at his feet.

“It’s more surprising that you’re here.I wasn’t aware you actually left your goddamn apartment.You sure as hell haven’t recently.Besides, I would’ve thought your emo ass would be allergic to the sun or something.”

“I’m not emo!”

“All you wear is black!How is that not emo?”

“There’s nothing wrong with black.”

“It’s not even a color.”

There was a response ready on the tip of Keith’s tongue, but he shoved it down.Scuffing his shoes on the grass, accidentally kicking some up, he said, “Lance, I…”

When he couldn’t force the words out, cursing himself silently, Lance mimicked him in a high, breathy voice.

“Oh my god,” Keith yelled.“I’m going to strangle you.”

“Like you strangled our friendship?”

“I was trying to un-strangle our goddamn friendship, you imbecile.”

“Wow, that’s a big word for…oh,” Lance murmured, voice going incredibly soft and quiet.“You were?”

Nodding, Keith blushed, looking back down at his feet.Now that they weren’t yelling at each other, he didn’t know what to say.This trip to the river was supposed to buy him time, not land him with less.

Gritting his teeth, he said, “I’m sorry.”

“What did you say?”

Flicking his eyes upward, he glared at Lance.But then Lance grinned and Keith was so relieved to see him smile that it was easier for him to repeat himself.“I’m sorry, alright?I shouldn’t have ignored you.”

“God, you suck at apologies.”

“Well, I’m sure as hell not going to apologize for that, because…”

“No, no,” Lance said, crossing the distance between them and making Keith’s heart go wild.“I don’t want you to hurt yourself.”

“Fuck you.”

“There’s the mullet-head I know and love.”

And that was just what Keith didn’t need, a reminder of how helplessly into Lance he was.He was so close, close enough to smell the suntan lotion he must’ve put on, his eyes were so blue and radiating happiness, and his smile didn’t wane, the mere presence of Keith seemingly enough to keep it on his face.It was beautiful and heady and Keith wasn’t sure he was going to survive it.This wasn’t going to work.They were just going to fight about the same thing over and over again and Lance wouldn’t ever understand what exactly was happening.

In another burst of impulse, something Keith really needed to work on, he reached into his pocket and pulled out the letter.Taking the wrist of Lance’s right hand, Keith turned it face up and placed the small square of notebook paper into Lance’s palm.Unable to help a minor amount of indulgence, Keith folded each one of Lance’s fingers over it, so that his hand formed a fist, completely concealing the letter.

Glancing up at Lance, Keith noticed he was flushed.Maybe it was the sun, maybe it was that they’d been close to a fight, or maybe it was because of _him_.

Pushing the hand away, he walked backwards, picked up his shirt, and then fled.

“Seriously?” Lance called after him.

“Just read it,” Keith shouted back. 

“I’ve got a revolutionary idea for you.You could stay and, like, wait for me to finish and then we could swim in the river.It’s a nice day and your pale-ass skin would probably thank you for the color.”

Turning around so he could see Lance, Keith kept walking backwards.“Yeah, I really couldn’t do that.”

“You’re fucking deranged, Kogane.”

Giving Lance a mock salute, Keith smiled.Only when he was out of the park and on his way home did he realize just what he’d done.“Shit,” he mumbled.All he could do now was hope that Lance would never bring up the contents of the letter.Keith had written a line at the bottom asking for just that.Even then, though, he’d known he was asking for something impossible.

As he walked, he texted Pidge.

_K: So I fucked up_

_P: How’s the afterlife?_

_K: Katie._

_P: Jesus, alright, no need to get snippy._

_P: Did you yell at him again?_

_K: No_

_K: I gave him the letter_

_K: I’m going to go jump off a bridge now.And I’m not joking this time_

_P: It was the right call, Keith._

_K: Are you sure?Because I’m super regretting it_

_K: Actually…_

_P: No._

_K: Please.I promise I’ll go home eventually_

_P: Fine.Come to the diner and pick me up._

_K: Done._

When he got to the diner, Pidge was waiting outside, scrolling through something on her phone.“Hey,” Keith said.

She looked up, rolled her eyes, and put her phone away.“If you want someone to comfort you, I suggest finding Shiro.I mean, I can try, but I can’t try for longer than like ten minutes.”

“I don’t need comfort, I just need a place Lance can’t find me.”

“Uh huh.”

“What?”

“He does know where I live, you know.”

“Pidge,” Keith groaned.“Where am I supposed to go?”

“I’m sure that bridge hasn’t moved.”

Slumping into the wall of the restaurant, Keith put his head in his hands and wondered if he could finish his bike in the next twenty minutes, so that he could ride it somewhere far, far away.Shiro would kill him for not getting it checked or registered first, but that was a price he was willing to pay at this point.

“You two deserve each other.”

“What?”

“You’re just as dramatic as him.”

“I am not!Do I need to remind you he got up on a table and made a speech about how I liked him?”

Pidge raised her eyebrows at him and he dropped it, seeing her point.Sighing, he bumped his hip against hers and they started walking to her house.It was the best option he had.Besides, he didn’t have to tell Lance where he was.

 

After hours of watching _Adventure Time_ , Lance still hadn’t tried to contact Keith in any way, shape, or form.It was not what Keith had predicted and now he was going crazy wondering if Lance had even read it. 

“I thought you didn’t want him to read it,” Pidge sighed.

“It’d be kind of rude if he didn’t.”

“Okay,” Pidge said, voice suddenly hard and determined.“You are getting up and going back to your apartment.I’ve done this for as long as I can.”

“What if…”

“Then you’ll have to talk to him, Keith.I’m sure you can handle it.Hell, if the two of you get your shit together, you might get laid or something.”Then she shuddered and murmured, “Definitely not thinking about that.”

Fumbling for words, Keith let himself be pushed to the door.Pidge opened it with one hand while she continued shoving with the other.Suddenly, he was out in the early evening sun and thinking about how satisfying it would be to stop Lance from talking with his lips.Pidge clearly caught on because she shoved him again unnecessarily and said, “Think about that somewhere else.”

“It’s going to be okay,” Keith murmured to himself.

“That’s the spirit.Bye.”

“You suck.”

“You suck more.I don’t need to hear your pining.Ever,” Pidge said.And then she shut the door in his face.

Grumbling to himself, Keith started home, listening to a Joy Divison album.He didn’t pay a lot of attention to where he was going, too busy imagining various scenarios, some of them ending with Lance hating him forever and others ending with them making out on Keith’s bed.

Which is why, when he was walking down the hall towards his apartment, he didn’t notice Lance lying in wait for him, sitting against the wall the exact same way he had been when he’d been locked out of his place all those weeks ago.Only when Lance said, “Keith!” practically yelling in his excitement, did Keith jump, one of his headphones falling from his ear.

Lying a hand over his chest and bending over slightly, Keith mumbled, “People need to stop doing that.”

“What were you so busy thinking about?”

Keith glared at Lance, finding the will to keep his feet moving to his door.

“Wait,” Lance called after him.“Come sit with me.”

“I’m not sitting out here with you.”

“Can I come in then?” 

“Yeah, fine,” Keith said, trying to sound casual.He failed miserably.Even he could hear how high-pitched his voice sounded.

Shoving the door open, Keith strolled in and was relieved to see that neither Allura or Shiro was around.Dropping his keys and phone on the counter, Keith toed off his shoes and went to the couch, not bothering to check on Lance.Either he would follow or he wouldn’t.

He did, flopping down beside Keith.Keith was so sure it was going to be awkward, but Lance immediately started talking, dispelling a lot of Keith’s anxiety.“You should’ve stayed with us at the river, man.It was a blast.There were a bunch of kids there and Hunk and I helped them find crawdads under rocks.One actually got me with it’s claws.”At that, Lance peered down at this thumb, clearly searching for some kind of mark.When he found it, he shoved his hand in Keith’s face and said, “See?Right there.”

“I don’t see anything,” Keith said.There was a faint, dark pink mark, likely a minor cut, but it wasn’t nearly impressive enough to complain about.

“Right there,” Lance said, pointing.

“Nope.”

“Are you sure?Because you could totally kiss it better if you want.”

“Jesus,” Keith mumbled, turning the TV on.It seemed a harmless enough activity and flipping through channels gave him something to prevent him from scurrying into his room and locking the door, because it seemed likely they were about to have The Conversation.

But, surprisingly, Lance didn’t say a word about the letter.He just pouted silently for a moment before saying, “Oh, I forgot to tell you…or, well, forgot is the wrong word, because I totally remembered, you were just being an asshole and not…”

“Lance.”

“Hey, man, I should get to point out how big of an asshole you were whenever I want.That should be the price you pay.”

“Fine.You were saying?”

“Oh, right.Hunk and I finished _Hot Fuzz_ after you left and it was actually pretty good.I’m not sure I would go so far as to say it was a cinematic masterpiece, but…”

“Cinematic masterpiece,” Keith interrupted.

“It was a bit weird.”

“It’s British.”

“I’m pretty sure it can be British and weird.In fact, it’s probably weird because it’s British.”

“What’s your cinematic masterpiece, then?” Keith asked, returning to where he’d started looking, wondering why there was no point in turning on a TV before eight.

“ _Spirited Away_.”

“I…”

“Oh god, don’t tell me you don’t like _Spirited Away_.I mean, I get that you seem to hate everything good in this world, but I would actually have to reconsider our friendship if you didn’t like _Spirited Away_.”

“I like _Spirited Away_ ,” Keith said, turning his gaze to Lance.“I just didn’t expect you to like something that’s actually good, considering your music taste.And, just, generally who you are.Isn’t it a little…serious to hold your attention?”Serious wasn’t quite the right word, but it would have to do.

“You can turn everything into an insult, can’t you?”

“Probably.”

Lance shrugged.“It doesn’t change the fact that we have something in common now, mullet-head.”

“A movie.Thrilling.”

“We should watch it sometime.”

“Okay,” Keith said, feeling a thrill shoot through his body.It was suddenly very hard to sit still and very hard to forget that Lance probably knew Keith had a massive crush on him.He probably knew and he still wanted to spend time with Keith.That had to be a good sign.

“Hey, can I ask you something?”

“Yeah.”

“Were you really sick when you left my apartment that night?”

“No,” Keith murmured, looking determinedly down at his hands.

Just as Lance was about to speak, the front door opened, Allura and Shiro spilling through, laughing about something.Keith was ready to kill them, but when they managed to stifle their surprise at seeing Lance in the living room, Keith decided a well-timed glare would be punishment enough.

“Hey, guys!” Lance said cheerfully, as though they hadn’t been interrupted at all.“What did you do on this fine day?”

“Work,” Shiro said.

“Work,” Allura echoed, setting down Shiro’s book bag by the door.She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and then went into the kitchen, grabbing a glass and filling it with water from the fridge.“Shiro and I were thinking of going on a walk, since it is such a nice day.Would the two of you like to come?”

“While I would love nothing more than to spend time with two of you, given what marvelously exquisite human beings you are, I’m completely wiped.I spent all day in the sun, entertaining some kids.And mullet-head here is allergic to the sun, so he’s good.”

Rolling his eyes, Keith said, “You do realize that just because you say something, it’s not automatically true, right?”

“What?”

“I’m not allergic to the sun.”

“Says you.”

Both Allura and Shiro laughed and Shiro gave Keith a painfully obvious thumbs up.Sighing, Keith stood and headed toward his room.“Do whatever you want,” he said, “as long as I don’t have to do it with you.”When he turned his attention to Lance, he saw that Lance hadn’t moved a muscle.He was being cautious.It hurt a little, but Keith knew it was deserved.“Well?” he said, pointedly looking into Lance’s eyes.“Are you coming or what?”

Lance grinned and leaped from the couch, giving a salute to Shiro and Allura, before strolling into Keith’s room.Keith moved to close the door and Shiro mouthed, “Proud of you, Keith.”

Smiling, Keith shut his door and turned to see Lance spread-eagle on the middle of his bed, staring around at the walls.He clearly had no issue getting comfortable.“Pink Floyd and space, huh?Those two certainly go together,” Lance said.

Keith shrugged, crossing his arms over his chest.This is what he’d wanted, but it was a singular sort of tension having Lance in his room.This was his private space where he spent most of his time.Not even Shiro came in often.Resting one knee on his bed, Keith said, “Move over.”

“Make me,” Lance grinned.

Grabbing the edge of the sheet Lance was currently lying on top of, Keith tightened it and then tugged sharply upward, dislodging Lance and rolling him slightly to the side.Letting the sheet fall, Keith joined Lance, keeping his limbs much closer to his body and staring at the ceiling.

“So can we play that game of twenty questions you’ve been putting off for ten years?” Lance asked.

“Sure.”

“It’s your question.”

“Uh…tell me about your family,” Keith said, thinking of all those pictures he’d seen.He desperately wanted to know who was who.

“That’s not a question, mullet-head.You really suck at this.At everything, actually.”

“Just fucking talk about your family, Lance.”

“Okay, well I have a mom and a dad and five brothers and sisters.Three sisters, two brothers.Two of my sisters are older than me, everyone else is younger.I don’t want to bore you, because there’s kind of a lot to talk about there, but they’re all really cool and I love them.”

“It wouldn’t bore me,” Keith said, feeling his face flush.

“Oh,” Lance replied, voice just as quiet.When Keith rolled his head to the side, too curious about the expression on Lance’s face, he saw that Lance’s cheeks were tinged pink.Before Keith could either make fun of him or ask once and for all what he thought of the letter, Lance was off, talking about his youngest sister, Clara, who he wrote letters to once a week because she was learning how to read.Talking about his oldest sister, Samara, Sam for short, who was in the Amazon forest, studying plants.Talking about his brothers, Sebastian and Kai, who were twins and were the troublemakers of the family, ignoring everyone and everything.Talking about Mari, who was one year younger than him, and was currently studying literature at University of Puget Sound and who constantly texted him to complain about the lack of sun.Then he moved onto his parents, voice warm and pleased, as he described how much they loved each other and how much they loved him.It was clear in his eyes how much he missed all of them and Keith felt a phantom loss for Lance and for his own family.When he finished, he smiled shyly and met Keith’s eyes.“So, yeah,” he said.“That’s my family.I’m so goddamn excited for school to be over, because it means I get to see them.Well, I won’t get to see Sam, but nobody gets to see Sam anymore.My mom gets a letter like once a month and she always complains about how little information it has in it.”

“It sounds nice,” Keith said.

“Can be.It can be really overwhelming sometimes, too.Oh, who am I kidding?It’s the greatest.”After a short pause, Lance said, “You mentioned…you mentioned that your mom was dead.Is your dad still alive?”

Keith shook his head.“Plane crash,” he said.“Not long after I was born.I was adopted by Shiro’s family, but I never really bonded or whatever.I mean, I did with Shiro, obviously, but…”

“That really sucks.I can’t even imagine.”

Shrugging, Keith returned his gaze to the ceiling.“Your question.”

“I just asked if your father was dead, you know.”

“You told me you’d rather be attractive and die in a year,” Keith said.“That was about my family.”

“Huh?”

“You answered your own question last time.That was me answering my question.”

“Oh, got it.Hey, Keith?” Lance asked, voice turning playful and flirtatious.

“What?”

“I bet you can guess what my next question is going to be.”

“I’m not going to guess.”

“Oh, come on, be fun for once in your life.It might do you some good,” Lance said.

“I really don’t think it will.”

“Fine.You’re so boring.”Then Lance went uncharacteristically quiet.Looking over, Keith saw a thoughtful expression on Lance’s face.He was clearly turning words over in his head and it was in that instant that Keith realized he did know what the question was going to be.It was obvious, really.He should’ve known.Maybe he had and his subconscious had kindly protected him from the information until now.In a slow voice, Lance said, “So I read your letter.”

“I figured.”

“Well, that’s a pleasant surprise.”

“What?”

“I expected you to mumble some half-ass excuse and then run into your bathroom and take a three hour shower or something.And I was going to pretend to be upset about it, but in reality, I wouldn’t have been, because a, the water would’ve gotten really cold in about a half hour because this apartment sucks and you would’ve frozen your balls off and b, that letter was nice and I know you’ve gotta be embarrassed about it.Hell, I’d probably be embarrassed about it.”Then, considering that, Lance continued by saying, “No, actually, I wouldn’t have been.I have literally no shame.”

“I’ve noticed.”

“So, mullet-head, do you have a super massive crush on me?Because that’s kind of what it sounded like.Still, I could be wrong, so I kind of need to hear it confirmed.Out loud.Unless you want to do something gross and romantic and write your answer on my back or something.Which, despite my use of the word gross, I totally wouldn’t mind you doing.”

“You talk too goddamn much.”

“You’re terrible at answering questions.”

“It’s called a diversion,” Keith said.

“Pointing out the diversion isn’t doing you any favors.”

“Yes,” Keith said, his heartbeat crashing in his ears.“I kind of do.It’s not a big deal, though.I’m sure I can get over it.”He couldn’t.He really couldn’t.There hadn’t really been a possibility before Lance talked about his family, but then Lance talked about his family and all hope was lost.Because Lance wasn’t just gorgeous.He was important.Keith cared.

“Wow.That’s romantic.”

“I wasn’t trying to be romantic.”

“Yeah, that’s obvious.You want to know what I think?”

“No,” Keith said flatly.But he did.God, did he want to know what Lance thought.About everything, but especially this.

“I think it would really be too bad if you got over me, because, uh…”

“Because?”

“You know, it would mean I’d have to get over you and that’s, uh, not something I want to do.Did that make sense?I really hope that made sense, because I’m not entirely sure what came out of my mouth just now.”

“Suave.”

“Was it really?” Lance asked, sounding hopeful.

“No.”

“Damn it.”

“Mm.”

“Keith?”

“Yeah?”

“What’s with all of the one syllable words?Like, don’t get me wrong, I’m glad you’re still talking, but it might be nice if you could string together a sentence or two.That’s all I’m asking for.I mean, obviously three sentences would be too much, so I won’t ask for that,” Lance said.

“I just…”Keith stopped. 

“Just?”

“Can you, uh, wait right here?”

“Sure,” Lance said.“You aren’t going to grab a plane to Ireland or something and leave me here, right?Because I will start singing ‘Sandy’ from _Grease_ and I _will_ make sure you hear it.”

“No.I’ll be right back,” Keith mumbled, getting up off his bed and mindlessly strolling out into the living room.Shiro and Allura were on the couch, making friendship bracelets; Keith had stopped questioning what they did together a long time ago.Without a word, he sat down beside Shiro and stared at the opposite wall.

“Hey, Keith,” Shiro said, slightly confused.“What’s up?”

“I think Lance just told me he likes me.”

“Then why are you out here?”

“He likes me,” Keith repeated.

“I do believe he’s broken.He certainly sounds like a malfunctioning robot,” Allura said.

Unsurprisingly, Shiro knew exactly what to say.“Yeah, he does like you, Keith.He really does.”

“Right.”The fragile hope that Keith had tried to smother bloomed in his chest and he felt himself smiling.But then it really settled in and he started to panic.He had no idea how to do this.There was probably a rule book, but Keith had never had the opportunity to learn it.

Sensing his panic, Shiro laughed and nudged Keith with his shoulder.“Go back to Lance.He’ll be able to help you better than I can.”

“Right,” Keith repeated, standing and slipping back inside his room.Returning to his spot on the bed, he could feel Lance fidgeting beside him through the vibrations in the mattress.There was probably something he was supposed to say, but he didn’t know what it was.

“You alright?” Lance asked, elbowing Keith in the arm.

“You like me,” Keith said.Apparently, they were the only words he was capable of saying.

“Yep.”

“And I like you.” 

“So you’ve said, anyway.You’re kind of shit at showing it.”

“I like you,” Keith said firmly.That seemed important to get across.

Lance laughed shakily.Keith glanced at him.When their eyes met, Lance smiled brightly, his shaky laugh getting breathier, and it was so endearing, because he hadn’t expected Lance to be like this.Lance, who could flirt with anything, was nervous and unsure and awkward.

They were both awkward, which became immediately apparent when it grew silent and neither of them were doing anything to remedy it.Thankfully, Lance saved the day.“It’s your question.”

“Do you like ice cream?”

“I love ice cream. 

“So do I.”

“Cool.”

“Could we…would you…” Keith exhaled loudly, frustrated with himself for being so abysmally bad at human interaction.

“Definitely,” Lance said.“Ice cream and _Spirited Away_?”

“Sure.”

“It’s a date.”

Keith grinned at the ceiling.Beside him, Lance murmured something under his breath, just quiet enough to miss, and Keith lolled his head in Lance’s direction.“What?” he asked.

“I said,” Lance began, loudly and with entirely faked confidence, “I like your smile.”

“Your smile is stupid,” Keith said, immediately slapping himself internally.Whatever the script was supposed to be, that definitely wasn’t his line.

“Rude.”But Lance was smiling.

“I like it,” Keith mumbled.That was better.

Lance’s smile only grew, somehow, and their eyes locked.The air in the space between them disappeared and Keith was suddenly overly aware of his body and just how close it was to Lance’s body.Swallowing loudly, Keith broke the eye contact, returning his gaze to the ceiling. 

“I should go,” Lance sighed.“I know it’s kind of horrible timing, but I told Hunk I’d only be gone like a half hour or so and it’s definitely been longer than that.I also said I’d watch a movie with him, because I wasn’t sure how this was going to go.I’ll admit, I’m kind of regretting…”

“Go,” Keith said.“It’s fine.I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Yeah,” Lance said, warm and excited, “You will.” 

“Cool.I’ll, uh, show you to the door.”

Lying a hand over his heart, Lance, in a surprisingly well done southern belle’s voice, said, “Why, young sir, I might just swoon.”

“I hate you.”

“Nah, you don’t.”

Together, they walked to the front door, Keith stubbornly ignoring both Shiro and Allura, who Lance was distinctly not ignoring, waving and saying goodbye.When they reached the door, Lance opened it and walked out.He didn’t just stroll away, though.He paused, pivoted, and said, loud enough for Shiro and Allura to hear, “I’m not saying you should wear your hair in a ponytail tomorrow, but you should wear your hair in a ponytail tomorrow.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Lance said.

“You do realize I’m not going to wear it in a ponytail just to spite you, right?”

Lance laughed.“Oh, I bet I can get you to put it up, mullet-head.”

“You’re on.”

They stood there for a minute, laughing and staring and then Lance backed away, keeping his eyes on Keith all the way to the door of his apartment.Then he bit his lip—creating a rather vivid of image of Keith doing that to Lance’s lip himself—smiled one last time, and disappeared inside his apartment. 

Keith did the same.Shiro and Allura were both staring at him and then Shiro said, “Someone got a date tomorrow?”

“I need to move out.”

“That’s cute, Keith.”

Without another word, Keith returned to his room, closed the door, and laid down on his bed.It was hours before he stopped smiling.


	7. Chapter Seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is almost seven thousand words of fluff. I have no explanation. It's just how it is. Maybe angst will come back someday. Who the fuck knows?  
> Anyway, thank you all so much, as usual. You make my life.  
> And thanks to Camille who is a drop of pure sunlight and who deserves only the fluffiest of bedtime stories  
> Enjoy! <3

_L: MORNING SUNSHINE!!!!_

_K: No_

_L: What do you wanna hear?_

_K: Silence_

_L: No can do_

_L: I’m in a good mood, which means I have to sing_

_L: And I have to shower because I’ve gotta look good.Impress you and stuff_

_K: It would impress me if you could not_

_L: You’re not telling me to change are you, mullet-head?_

_L: Cuz my mom said to kick those girls to the curb_

_L: Admittedly, that was before she knew I was bi, so boys weren’t included, but I bet she’d the say the same thing about boys_

_K: I’m canceling ice cream_

_L: :(_

_L: :(((((((((((_

_L: It’s a date, Keith.A date._

_K: IT IS 730 ON A SUNDAY_

_L: DATE  
L: Aren’t you excited?_

_K: No_

_L: Kay I need reassurance now, my man_

_L: I also need you to pick a song.Or I’ll pick a song_

_K: Just take one from that stupid list you have_

_L: …you know about the list?_

_K: No?_

_L: Hmmmmmm…I don’t believe you_

_L: We’ll talk about this later, babe_

_K: I regret everything_

_L: You do?_

_K: …no.No, I don’t_

_L: !!!!!_

Smiling to himself, Keith flung his sheets off his chest, the sudden fluttering of anticipation making him hot.Getting more comfortably settled into his bed, Keith waited for the rush of water and for Lance to sing.There was no way he was getting more sleep, and honestly, this was much better.

Because he and Lance were going on a date.Today.And even though Keith couldn’t decide if he’d rather fling himself into the sun or go on the date and land himself in some inevitably embarrassing and awkward situation, it didn’t change the fact that he couldn’t stop thinking about Lance, couldn’t stop replaying last night in his head.

The water burst to life and Keith grinned as Lance started to sing “Teenage Dream”, purposefully making his voice high and breathy.It was laughably awful, but Keith found himself thinking it was endearing.At least, until Lance reached the chorus and then Keith’s heart started to race and he had a hard time ignoring the fact that just on the other side of that wall, Lance was naked.

Kicking off the rest of his sheets, Keith sat up in bed and ruffled his hair, yawning.Staring out the small window in his room, Keith saw it was the start of another warm and sunny day, perfect for ice cream.It wasn’t as though Keith had stopped smiling since he’d woken up, but now he was grinning, imagining how the day would go and wondering if he would get kissed and how the fuck he was going to pretend to know what he was doing if that happened.

“Shit,” Keith mumbled.Now he was panicking.Great.He loved going through this many emotions this early in the morning.

Actually, he never went through this many emotions so fast at any time of day. 

Luckily, Lance belted out the last couple lines of “Teenage Dream”, briefly distracting Keith from what was sure to be a complete and utter freak out.Knocking against the wall, Keith shouted, “Katy Perry?Really?”

“I always knew you were a closet Katy Perry fan.”

“That is not what I said.That’s the opposite of what I said, actually.”

“But you make me feel like I’m living a teenage dream, Keith.”

Blushing and smiling down at his lap, Keith yelled, “Yeah, whatever.I’m going to go drink all the coffee we have because some asshole woke me up.”

“I bet you were already awake,” Lance shouted back.

Choosing not to respond to that—because he very definitely had been, but Lance didn’t need to know—Keith slipped out into the living room and found it surprisingly empty.Nobody had made coffee yet, so Keith set about doing that, letting the monotony of the actions distract him from his stomach, which was currently twisting itself into knots. 

As the coffee dripped into the pot, Keith set about scrounging for food, finding some english muffins and leftover bacon in a ziploc bag in the fridge.Wondering when Shiro had cooked bacon, Keith toasted an english muffin, buttered it, and then slapped the bacon down in the middle and shoved half of it in his mouth. 

The sound of the coffee machine was generally enough to wake up any member of the apartment and sure enough, Shiro wandered out in sweatpants and a long shirt.Allura followed him in a fuzzy lavender bathrobe.Unlike Shiro, she’d managed to make herself sort of presentable.

“Actually sleep?” Keith asked.

“Think so,” Shiro smiled, coming up beside Keith and staring down at the tiny chunk of english muffin and bacon left.“Do you want an actual breakfast?” 

“Not super hungry,” Keith said.

“Ah, yes,” Allura said.“The date!Are you excited, Keith?”

Keith shrugged, resenting that Allura had jumped from a lack of hunger to Lance.While it wasn’t an inaccurate leap, Keith steal hated that she could make it.

“That’s code for ‘really, really excited,’” Shiro said, nudging Keith with his elbow.

“And I’m out of here.”

“Gonna finish her today?”

“That’s the goal,” Keith said, flashing Shiro a grin.

“I’ll call the mechanic then.”

“The mechanic?”

“I’ve been researching.”

Keith shook his head mockingly, but the gesture was completely disregarded by his smile.It was one of those moments where Keith was reminded just how easy it was to love Shiro.There was never a second where Keith doubted that Shiro loved him unconditionally and completely, because he did things like research a good mechanic, knowing Keith would just call whoever came up first on Google.

After he collected his things, he left the apartment and walked to the garage.He was hard at work, sweat dripping down his neck and front, when his phone buzzed.Since it interrupted his music, Keith glanced down and saw that it was Lance.

_L: You ready?_

_K: At 1030?_

_K: Is that when you typically eat ice cream?_

_L: Sure.Why not?_

_K: You’re weird_

_L: I just really want to see you, man_

_L: And Hunk has kicked me out of the apartment so I’m kind of homeless_

_K: Why’d he kick you out?_

_L: Shay may have been over and I may have been pestering Hunk.Like…hardcore_

_K: A wise decision on his part, then_

_L: HEY_

_K: I’m not ready, no_

_L: Getting pretty??? ;)_

_K: No_

_K: I’m at the garage_

_L: Ah gotcha_

_K: I’m beginning to think I shouldn’t have told you that_

_K: And you’ve gone suspiciously quiet.Great_

Sure enough, less than twenty minutes later, Lance came strolling into the garage and Keith didn’t think it was possible for him to improve his appearance in any way, because he kept himself pretty together, but he was wearing slightly tighter jeans than normal and they were black and the blue shirt he was wearing did unfairly wonderful things to his eyes.Lance caught him staring and automatically, Keith looked back down at his bike and focused on the task at hand.

There was a low laugh and then Lance sat down beside him, just where he always did, and said, “You can look you know.I did go to all this work just for you.Not everyone gets this experience.You should appreciate it.”Then two warm fingers slipped underneath the strap of Keith’s tank top and Lance said, “Haven’t seen you in one of these before.Turns out your arms aren’t as scrawny as I imagined.”

“You should probably discard that line.”

“Didn’t work?”

“Nope.”

“Thanks for the feedback.It’s always welcome,” Lance said.

Keith hummed in response, finding it difficult to focus on his task now that Lance was here.And he definitely wasn’t making it easy, fidgeting, and purposefully—probably—drawing attention to the collar of his shirt and the smooth, brown skin beneath.Closing his eyes, Keith said, “Can you, like, go walk around the block a couple times?Or something?I kind of want to finish her today.”

“Am I distracting you?” Lance asked, voice amused.

“Yeah.”

“Good to know I have that effect.”

“Oh for…” 

Laughing loudly, Lance stood and said, “I’m going, I’m going.How many times do I have to walk around this hypothetical block?It’s kind of hot, you know.If I start sweating, I’ll ruin all of this.”Keith wasn’t looking at him, but he was confident Lance was gesturing to his entire body. 

“All of what?” Keith asked, double checking the wiring for the head and brake lights. 

“‘All of what’ he says,” Lance murmured.“I have it on good authority you very much like all of this, so you can stop pretending.”

“Bye, Lance.”

There was a heavy, dramatic sigh and then the sounds of his footsteps gradually faded until they disappeared.

Fifteen minutes later, Lance popped his head around the side of the garage door and said, “Are you done?Can I come in?”

“No.”

“What about now?”

“A second later?Seriously?” 

“Just checking,” Lance said.

Rolling his eyes, Keith glanced up and saw Lance watching him with a gaze more intense than was typical for him.Once he noticed Keith’s eyes on him, though, he smiled and said, “I’ll just go walk another block then, shall I?”

Keith nodded, feeling sort of bad.It wasn’t his fault Lance had decided to come here, though.He had very distinctly said that he wasn’t ready for their date, after all.There was nothing stopping Lance from walking home and waiting for him to be done.

Except that Keith had a guess as to why he couldn’t.It had been hard enough separating from Lance last night and now that they were together again, Keith would prefer it stay that way.Frankly, if Lance begged him to stop working on his motorcycle, he would.Maybe Lance was feeling the same way.

By the time Lance worked his way back around, Keith was close enough to done to be satisfied.Everything left was simply cosmetic and didn’t need to be checked by a mechanic.“You can come in,” he told Lance, who had taken to sitting to the side of the entrance.Keith only knew because he was humming quietly to himself.He wasn’t entirely sure Lance was aware he was doing it.

Lance did just that, stopping in front of the bike and looking it over.To Keith, she was absolutely beautiful, but for some reason, he was waiting anxiously to hear what Lance thought.Maybe it was because Keith desperately wanted for them to ride her together someday.In an awed voice, Lance said, “It’s amazing, Keith.You’re amazing.”

Flushing, Keith looked down at his feet and said, “Thanks.”

“So what’s her name?”

“I don’t know.”

“How do you not know?” Lance asked, doing the waving thing with his arms.“You decide to give it a fucking gender, but you don’t have a name?That’s an oversight.Do you think if I gave birth to a child I would just leave it nameless?”

“There are so many things wrong with that sentence.”

“She needs a name, mullet-head.”Then, after a momentary pause, Lance started listing off names.“Sheila, Marlene, Trisha, Alanna, Kristen…”

“Those are all terrible.”

“You try coming up with a name for a motorcycle.”

Keith looked down at his bike, imagined her with her coating of red paint, imagined her speeding down the highway, and he knew what her name was.Though he did find the whole thing rather unnecessary, so he was about to say she didn’t need a name, when he met Lance’s eyes and felt his words die.For whatever reason, this was important to Lance.That much was obvious.“Her name’s Red.”

“Now that’s terrible.”

“Oh, fuck off.What do you know?”

“I know that that’s not any better than whatever I had.It’s not even a name.It’s a color.”

“It’s still better.”

“Is not,” Lance argued.

“Is too.”

A bark of a laugh escaped Lance’s mouth and he came around the bike so that he was standing right beside Keith.Nudging him gently, he said, “Can we go get that ice cream now?I think you’ve bored me long enough.”

“You could’ve just left.”

“Joking, dude.”

“Oh,” Keith said, looking down at his hands, smudges of black on his fingertips.“I’m kind of gross.I should change, probably shower.”

“Nah, man, you look good.”

“Yeah, sure.”

“No, you…”Lance broke off and Keith flicked his eyes upward just in time to catch the flush in Lance’s cheeks.When their eyes met, they held, and Lance continued in a bashful sort of voice.“You’re really pulling off the ruggedly handsome thing right now and I kind of dig it.”

“Even with my mullet?”

“Would be better if you tied it up.”

Not dropping his gaze, Keith gathered up his hair and slowly wrapped a hairband around it.After he finished, he had no recollection of why the fuck he’d done that.

“Told you I’d get you to put it up,” Lance said, voice distant.

“Ready?”

Lance nodded and Keith felt himself smiling.He had no idea what the hell he was doing, but with Lance’s eyes and attention solely on him, he felt daring and impulsive.Maybe for once, his impulsiveness would do him a favor.

After locking up the garage, they set off down the street, away from the apartment.There was a pretty good ice cream shop near here and since Lance wasn’t offering anything, Keith figured it would do.

They were silent and Keith was fluctuating between finding something to say and letting it remain silent.He knew that most dates involved talking, but he didn’t mind simply sharing space with someone.

Thankfully, it was a lot harder for Lance to remain quiet, and he ended Keith’s debate only minutes after it started.“Where’s the first place you’re going to ride your motorcycle to?”

“There’s a hill just outside of town.That’s where.”

“Why?”

Keith didn’t say anything, shoving his hands into his pockets, and Lance got predictably excited, hitting Keith in the arm and saying, “Oh my god, Kogane, now you have to tell me.Why?Why?Why?”

“It’s a good place to watch sunsets, alright?”

Lance’s face lit up and he said, “So you like sunsets?Do you also like long strolls on the beach?Ooh, or being serenaded in the moonlight?Dancing in the rain? _Kissing_ in the rain?”

“I’m going to hurt you.”

“Well, that’s rude.Because if you do like any of those things, I would be more than happy to help.I’m good at serenading and dancing and kissing.And obviously I can walk.I’m doing that right now,” Lance said, not deterred in the slightest.

“You’re bouncing.I’m not sure that counts.”

As if he hadn’t heard Keith, Lance said, “We should go dancing.”

“No,” Keith replied firmly.

“Why not?I’ve got some killer salsa moves and I could totally teach you.It’d be fun.”

“It’d be more fun to dig my eyeballs from my head.”

“That’s graphic,” Lance said, pulling a face.“And upsetting.You have pretty eyes that, I promise, look much better in your head.”

“Figured out what color they are yet?”

Lance laughed and elbowed Keith in the side, earning him an elbow in return.They were both blushing and it actually relieved Keith, something he hadn’t entirely expected.When Lance had flirted with him early in their acquaintanceship, he hadn’t been anywhere near blushing.Nor had he been when flirting with Allura.The faint pink in his cheeks made it real. 

“Nope,” Lance said.“I think I’ll have to stare at them a lot longer.Any objections?”

“No,” Keith mumbled.

“That line totally worked, didn’t it?”

“Are you always like this?”

The silence that followed was far from comfortable.Wincing, Keith side-eyed Lance and noticed his head was hanging slightly, the smooth expanse of his nape looking vulnerable.It occurred to Keith for the first time—though he was willing to admit he probably should’ve noticed earlier—that Lance wasn’t nearly as secure in himself as he seemed.Biting the inside of his cheek, Keith considered his options.

When it looked as though Lance was finally going to respond, Keith didn’t let him.Reaching out, he took Lance’s hand in his, allowing himself to indulge in how it felt.The smoothness of his palm, the warmth, the bones and tendons, the way it all tightened and moved when Lance held his hand back.Squeezing it gently, Keith said, “I don’t mind.”

“Are you…”

“I.Don’t.Mind.”

“You know, mullet-head, you’re kind of holding my hand,” Lance said, bumping their shoulders together.

“You like testing me, don’t you?”

“It’s how we communicate.”

Snorting, Keith started to slip his hand from Lance’s, but Lance held it firm.“Oh no, you can’t escape now.I’m only letting this hand go when I’ve got my ice cream and I need both hands to eat it.And even then, I’m gonna try to eat with one hand first, just to make sure.”

“My hand’s going to get sweaty.”

“So is mine.And I know it’s gross, like really gross to be honest, but I’m going to put up with it because I like your stupid hand.”

“Why?”

“You’re showing affection.I’m not convinced that happens all that often, so I’m taking advantage.”

Keith shrugged, not interested in explaining to Lance that he was absolutely starved for touch all the time and that he’d only tried to pull his hand away because he hadn’t ever done this before and he was absolutely clueless. 

Judging by how immediately comfortable Lance was, he had done this before.He started yammering away about how fucked he was for his finals in a couple weeks and was swinging their clasped hands with gentle ease.While Keith was positive whatever Lance was talking about was worth listening to, he couldn’t focus on anything besides the fact that he felt obscenely nauseous and Lance’s hand was around his.He was in way over his head.

Slowly, he came to awareness and Lance was saying his name.

“Sorry, what?”

“You know, with most people, that would lose you a second date.”

“It’s a good thing you’re not most people then,” Keith said without thinking about it. 

“That was…flattering, Kogane.”

Choosing to ignore that, Keith tugged gently on Lance’s hand and pulled them to the other side of the sidewalk where the door of the ice cream shop was.He dropped Lance’s hand, which was immediately protested.At least, until it was clear Keith was holding open the door for Lance and then Lance started talking about what a gentleman he was. 

Hanging back, Keith watched as Lance paced up and down the small shop, inspecting every flavor of ice cream.When he found what he wanted, something atrociously bright colored—almost definitely a sorbet—his rocked forward on his feet and declared it loudly, pointing.The man behind the counter smiled before helping and Keith understood, because it was a lot like watching a child discover something new about the world.Lance managed to infuse every action with so much joy and optimism and wonder, that it made Keith believe in a world that was infinitely kinder than the one he’d known for most of his life.If there were people in it like this, it couldn’t be all that bad of a place.

“See something you like?” Lance asked, striking an absolutely ridiculous pose against the bank of glass showcasing the ice cream.His arms were spread wide, hands pressed flat against the glass and he let his head fall back, baring his neck.  One knee was bent, leg raised by the tips of his toes.

Laughing despite himself, Keith approached the counter and asked for a scoop of triple chocolate in a sugar cone. 

When they’d both gotten their ice cream, Keith paid, waving off Lance’s protestations, and then strolled outside, finding a place on the sidewalk that was relatively clean and sat down, leaning against the building.

“Not quite what I anticipated our seating arrangements would be,” Lance said, unconcerned, sitting beside Keith, their knees knocking together.

They ate their ice cream without exchanging words, Keith enjoying the sun and the press of a knee against his.This was the kind of human interaction he could not only withstand, but enjoy.Not to mention, every time he peeked over at Lance—something they were both doing an embarrassingly large amount—he seemed not to mind in the slightest.Halfway through his cone, Lance let out a soft whine and said, “Keith.”

“What?”

“I stopped holding your hand and I forgot I wanted to be it.How did you let me forget?”

“How is that my fault?”

“Because it is.”

“That’s not even a reason,” Keith said.

“Totally is.”

“Then just hold my fucking hand if it bothers you so much,” Keith grumbled, licking another stripe up the side of his ice cream.There was no way in hell he was going to make it easy, so he used both hands to hold his cone.It was completely unnecessary, but worth it when Lance peeled one off the cone and twined his fingers in between Keith’s, making his stomach drop.

“Why are you doing that with your face?” Lance asked.

“It’s just…this is weird.”

Keith was kind of expecting Lance to jump on that and complain, maybe talk about how singular of an experience it was for him, something that would only make it weirder, but he didn’t.Instead, he nodded and said, “It’s totally weird.I wasn’t even sure you would let me hold your hand and then you just hold mine like it’s no big deal.Like, I’ve been imagining it for ages and you’re actually letting it happen.Keith Kogane, my neighbor and resident emo, is holding my motherfucking hand and it’s nice.”

“Imagining it for ages?”

Laughing and blushing, Lance said, “Did I say that?”

“You’ve…”

“Yeah.”

“Oh.”

“I kind of really like you, mullet-head.”

“Well, that’s…” Keith paused, unable to truly wrap his head around the idea that Lance had wanted this as long as he had.That Lance wanted this at all.In a moment of panic, he continued by saying, “Why the fuck did you get sorbet?”

“Because it tastes good?Duh.”

“Every other goddamn flavor in that shop is better than sorbet.Sorbet isn’t even real ice cream.”

“Well you got triple chocolate.”

“Are you seriously saying you don’t like chocolate?” Keith asked, biting off a chunk of his cone and crunching through it aggressively.Their eyes hadn’t left each others in god knows how long, but while they were doing this—bickering—it didn’t make Keith feel like he was in another person’s body.

“That’s just a lot of chocolate.Don’t you want some variety?”

“Where’s the fucking variety in sorbet?”

“Mine isn’t triple sorbet.If it was triple sorbet, I bet it would have a variety of fruit flavors, which is way different than different kinds of chocolate.Chocolate all tastes the same,” Lance argued.

“It does not all taste the same!”  
  
“Oh, so you’re one of those.”

“One of what?They literally all taste different.”

“Do they?”

“Yes,” Keith said firmly. 

“Okay, I mean, technically they do…”

“Ha.”

“Hey,” Lance said, “I wasn’t finished.”

“Doesn’t matter.I already won.”

“Who said anything about winning?”

“If you’d won, you’d be bragging about it, so shut up.”

Laughing, Lance let it go, scooting closer to Keith so the length of their sides were pressed together.Putting their linked hands on top of his knee, Lance stared at them while he carefully slid his fingers in and out of Keith’s, rearranging how he held it over and over again.Swallowing loudly, Keith looked down at his lap and focused on breathing.

“Okay over there?”

“Shut up,” Keith mumbled.

“I can’t believe you’re losing it because I’m playing with your hand.”Then he drew a gentle finger down the length of Keith’s middle finger to the inside of his wrist and the light chuckle that followed made it very obvious that the shiver running down Keith’s spine was entirely purposeful.

“Didn’t I tell you to shut up?” Keith said, dislodging Lance and standing in a rush.Finishing his cone in two bites, he started down the street, heading back to the apartment.He knew he was being dramatic, but it seemed like fair payback for what Lance had just done to him, what he kept doing.

There was a shriek from behind him and it wasn’t long before Lance caught up.Launching himself ahead of Keith on the sidewalk, Lance blocked his path and said, “Nobody’s ever held your hand before, have they?”

Keith was not going to talk about this.“Get out of my way.”

“Nope.”

“I don’t have an issue with getting violent.”

“That should also lose you a second date, probably.”

Rolling his eyes, Keith shoved his shoulder into Lance’s and managed to get by him.Surprisingly, Lance didn’t object and when he continued walking, he hovered a couple of steps behind Keith.He did talk, though.“You know, I don’t really know what you want this to be and that’s fine because I’m thinking we shouldn’t have that conversation right now, but it is worth mentioning that you’re gonna have to trust me at some point.Probably.Unless you just want to bang me, I guess, which, like, I’m not opposed to, but…oh, wait, we’re not talking about that.Sorry.Point is, you can tell me you haven’t held anyone’s hand before and I’ll be nice about it, because, obviously, it’s something you’re uncomfortable about and I’m not an asshole.I’m not a mind reader, Kogane.You’ve got to _tell_ me things.”

“I don’t tell people things,” Keith said.

A low, distressed noise came from Lance and suddenly, he was back in front of Keith, blocking his path again.Ignoring Keith’s glare, he took his hand in both of his and pressed it against his chest, right over his heart.Keith could feel it thumping, faster than it should’ve been.As fast as Keith’s was.Smiling, Lance said, “Come on, man.Look at this face.Don’t I look trustworthy?”

“Don’t I?”

“Huh?”

“I’m not stupid, Lance.I know all of your…your bluster is a cover.And it’s chill.Cover whatever you want.Just let me do the same.”

Lance’s mouth fell open and his hands tensed around Keith’s.Before he could say anything, an irritated man shoved past them, mumbling something about idiots standing in the middle of the sidewalk, and the inescapable tension broke enough for Keith to pull his hand away and resume walking. 

“I’ll get vulnerable if you do,” Lance challenged from behind him.

“God,” Keith whispered, walking faster. 

“Come on, it’ll be fun.”

Ignoring him, Keith only walked even faster.  
  
“Can’t escape me, Kogane.”

“Like hell I can’t,” Keith said to himself, breaking into a run.It seemed like the thing to do at the time.Whatever it took to prove Lance wrong.

“Are you seriously running?” Lance shouted, but judging from the hard slap of feet against the pavement, he was running too.Only Lance would indulge Keith like this.Both Pidge and Shiro would let him go, texting later to test the waters.

When they were almost back to the apartment, Keith was losing steam.It was hot, he was definitely sweating, and while he did exercise, it was usually in clothing more suited for the activity.Therefore, it wasn’t a complete shock when arms caught him around the middle and wrenched him to a stop.“Caught you,” Lance panted into his ear.

Slapping his arms away, Keith found a patch of grass decorating the edge of the sidewalk and collapsed onto it, breathing hard.Staring up at the sky, he marveled at just how blue it was.Without looking at Lance, he said, “No.”

“No what?”

“Nobody’s held my hand before.” _Nobody’s ran after me before.Nobody’s been fucking insane enough to do either_.

“Remember my first question in our game of twenty questions?” Lance asked, sitting down on the curb, his back to Keith.Feeling safe, Keith rolled his head to the side and stared at Lance’s back, his shirt plastered to it with sweat.Lance was exceedingly lanky, but there were definitely muscles there, lean and defined.

“Yeah,” Keith murmured.

“I would pick attractive, but it’s not because of whatever reason I gave you.That reason was so much a lie that I don’t even remember what I came up with.What did I come up with?”

“Uh…something about not being able to live ugly?”

“Okay, yeah, I can see that.The truth is, I would pick attractive because I wouldn't want to be alive once all of my family and friends were gone.Like, I get I could make new friends and start another family or something, but…I wouldn’t want to.”

“Why did you come to school here?” Keith asked.

“The engineering program.It’s one of the best."  After a long pause, Lance said, "What’s your deal about school?” easily drawing the attention away from himself.

“That obvious, huh?”

Lance shrugged, the muscles in his back tensing with the motion.Keith wanted to trace them.“Kind of.When I was talking about my finals earlier, you got kind of distant.It’s happened more than once.”

“I wanted to go, but I couldn’t.”

“Why not?”

“High school sucked.Failed a couple classes, barely passed most.Nobody wanted me except the local community college and…”

“And?”

Letting out a heavy sigh, Keith said, “And I wasn’t sure I could pass any of those either, not at the time, so I just…didn’t try.Got a job, lived with Shiro, and started working on building a motorcycle, so I could convince myself I was doing _something_ with my life.”

“Working is doing something, you know.And the fact that you’re building a motorcycle is still one of the coolest fucking things.”

“I’m basically done with her,” Keith said, not wanting to talk about school anymore.It was rare when he even let himself think about high school.

Lance adjusted so that he was facing Keith and he grinned down at him.“Yeah?You gonna take me to that hill with you?”

“If you want.”

“I definitely want.”

Smiling, Keith sat up and cringed at the way his shirt was clinging to his body.“I really need to shower.”

“Yeah, same.You kind of ruined my look with your running stunt.”

“Sorry.”  
  
“No, you’re not.”

“No, I’m not,” Keith laughed, running a hand through his bangs, lifting them from his forehead.His ponytail was loose enough that the movement was enough to dislodge the hairband.Turning to search through the grass, he saw Lance’s fingers plucking it from the ground.

“Can I put it back up for you?”

“You don’t want to touch my hair.”

“I kind of do, actually.”

“Oh, uh…okay,” Keith said, sitting straighter. 

Fingers threaded into his hair, gathering strands at the base of his neck.Giggling, Lance said, “Dude, your hair is so stringy and greasy.”

“No shit.”

But Lance’s fingers didn’t leave his hair.They lingered, in fact, nails scraping lightly against Keith’s scalp as each lock of hair was pulled in tight.Keith’s eyes fluttered closed as shivers ran down his spine.Unlike earlier, however, these shivers lulled him into a state of lethargy.Not once in his life had someone done this for him and Keith didn’t want Lance to stop.

“There,” Lance murmured, snapping the hairband into place.

“Thanks.”

“ _Spirited Away_?”

“Showering.” 

“Oh, right.Still a good idea.”Lance stood and reached down to help Keith up.When they were both standing, Lance didn’t let go of his hand and they ambled the rest of the way back to the apartment, hip-checking one another when they though the other was distracted.

Lance walked Keith all the way to his door, and said, “See you in a few, gorgeous.”

“You’re going to have to let go of my hand, _gorgeous_.”

“Oh my god, did you just flirt?Purposefully?With me?” 

Shoving Lance’s shoulder, Keith dropped his hand, stepped into his apartment and shut the door in his face.

“That probably should’ve lost you a second date, too,” Lance shouted through the door.

Keith laughed, though he abruptly cut it off when he noticed Allura and Shiro grinning at him from the couch.“What are you two staring at?”

“You look happy,” Shiro said.

“Revolutionary.”

“Kind of is.”

Shaking his head, Keith strolled toward his room.

“Wait, Keith,” Allura called.“How did it go?”

“It’s not over,” Keith said, unable to prevent himself from smiling. 

 

Half an hour later, Keith was at Lance’s door.His hair was still wet, but he was wearing the outfit he’d intended on wearing, a red jacket over the top of his typical black shirt. 

After he knocked, the door opened and Lance grinned.His hair was sparkling with drops of water and he was still shirtless, thin but not unattractive, his hip bones defined.This time, Keith allowed himself to stare.There was no way Lance had done this on accident.

"Wow, I do believe that is a color other than black."

That was exactly the reaction Keith had expected.  However, he hadn't quite anticipated Lance being shirtless, so whatever witty response he'd had prepared was no longer hovering at the front of his mind, ready to be said.

Smirking, Lance said, “I don’t have to go put a shirt on if you don’t want.”

“Go put a shirt on,” Hunk called from inside the apartment.

“Oh, yeah, Hunk is here, by the way.Wasn’t really supposed to be, but I’m sure we can put up with him.Can’t we?”

“Course,” Keith said, earning him another stunningly beautiful smile.

“Cool,” Lance replied.“I’m gonna go put a shirt on.Feel free to get comfortable.The movie is all set up and stuff, so you don’t have to do a thing.There’s even popcorn.”

“You’ve been busy.”

“Impressed?”

“I’m not unimpressed.”

“I’ll take it,” Lance said, grabbing Keith’s arm and dragging him into the apartment.Then he went into his room.Keith walked to the couch, said hi to Hunk, and then nestled on the other side, curling his legs up to his chest.

It was only seconds before Lance was back, acting like an excited golden retriever whose owner just returned home from work.His computer was hooked up to the TV and _Spirited Away_ was already up, paused.All Lance did was press play, before settling next to Keith on the couch.“Alright, mullet-head, I’ve got a question for you.”

“What?”

“Would you prefer me to put my arm around you now or would you prefer me to pretend like I’m oblivious for ten minutes, before I yawn, stretch, and then casually settle my arm around your shoulders?”

“Any way I can opt out?”

“Nope.”

Smiling, Keith tilted his body sideways and fell into Lance, laying his head back on Lance’s shoulder.An arm slipped around his waist and Keith relaxed into it, automatically feeling comfortable, despite how bony Lance’s arm was. 

Even better, he was actually capable of paying attention to the movie, even when Lance was whispering commentary into his ear.It helped that Hunk also kept up a much louder running commentary, filled with self-deprecating jokes and constant adoration for Chihiro.

When it was over, Keith didn’t want to move.He was warm and sleepy and the sun was lowering in the sky, flooding the apartment with lazy light which felt more like summer than spring.Wordlessly, Hunk stood from the couch and headed into his room.

“Going home?” Lance murmured.

“Just, for once in your life, please stop talking.”

And Lance did.Keith didn’t know how long they sat there together, leaning against each other, but it was long enough for him to fall asleep.

 

He woke to Lance shaking his shoulder, smiling down at him.“Hey, sleepyhead, are you staying for dinner?”

“I fell asleep?”Blinking, Keith sat up, a blanket that had been draped over him falling off his shoulders.

“Yep.On top of me.It was adorable.”

“Adorable.”

“That’s what I said.”

“Uh…no,” Keith said.“No, I should go home and…I’m gonna go home.”It had been a long, draining day—clearly—and Keith wanted to be somewhere familiar and preferably alone.

“Okay,” Lance said.“I’ll walk you back.”

“Five feet?”

“Five feet.”

Yawning, Keith rose from the couch and a hand fell to the small of his back, cautious and light, not directing him, but grounding him.Almost as soon as the hand was there, it was gone, but Keith’s chest filled with warmth at the simple affection of the touch.

They were at his door too soon. 

“So, I think we learned a lot of important things today, but the most important by far was that I’m comfortable enough to sleep on.That, or the fact that you have no issue with literally running away from you problems.Not gonna lie, it was kind of hilarious, Kogane.”

“I’m glad I amused you.”

“Hey, if I’m amused, I’m happy.And if I’m happy, I can make you happy.It’s a win-win, really,” Lance said.

“Truly,” Keith said, opening the front door and stepping inside.He turned to close the door, but Lance stopped him with a palm flat against it.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

“I’m not going to stand there all night, so I thought I’d leave before that happened.”

“What was the most important thing you learned today?”

“Why are you so weird?”

“Hey, you’re the one who went on a date with me.”

Keith grinned down at his feet.Figuring he couldn’t say what he wanted to say while making eye contact, he kept his gaze fixed on his feet.“You ran after me.I didn’t know if you would.”

“Hey, Keith?”  Lance's voice was shaking slightly.

Keith looked up.

“Got a song you want tomorrow?”

“Surprise me,” Keith said, stepping forward and pressing his lips to Lance’s cheek.When he pulled away, Lance was holding a hand to his cheek, looking slightly dazed.“Surprise me as good as I just surprised you.”

A breath of laughter escaped Lance and he nodded.“I’ve totally got this covered.You’ll be so surprised, you’ll fall out of bed.You’ll be so surprised, you’ll need to see me immediately.  No, you’ll be so surprised, that you’ll…”

“Jesus, I get it.Go away.”

“Hey, you know I really like you, right?”

“I do.”

“And you really like me?”

“Yeah,” Keith said.

“Good,” Lance said.“Because I really want to do what we did today like as much as possible.”

“Okay.”

“Does that mean…”

“Lance,” Keith said.“If you say another word, I will find a frying pan, knock you out with it, and leave you against the wall.”

Nodding, Lance bounded forward and pecked Keith on the cheek, leaving a flush in its wake, and returned to his apartment, humming something sweet and slow as he did.Only when Keith was back in his room, wondering how long he could go without texting Lance something, anything, did he realize that Lance had been humming “The Trapeze Swinger”, an Iron and Wine song that Keith hadn’t ever played for him.

 

When he woke the next morning, four texts were waiting for him.

_L: THE LIST_

_L: I KNEW I’D FORGOTTEN SOMETHING AND IT WAS THE GODDAMN LIST_

_L: I’m blaming you for being so distracting, because I wouldn’t normally forget something as important as this.How did you know about my list?_

_L: Also, I spent half the night trying to come up with what I’d forgotten to ask you and the other half thinking about you_


	8. Chapter Eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much. You're beautiful and wonderful and deserve the world  
> And thanks to Camille, who is the moon of my life. I would stop using space metaphors, but space metaphors are pretty apt for Voltron, so whatever. I'm gonna keep doing it.  
> Enjoy! <3

_I didn’t fall out of my bed in surprise,_ Keith texted after reading Lance’s texts and wondering how he was supposed to accomplish anything with his day after learning Lance had been thinking of him. 

There hadn’t been any singing this morning, actually, unless Keith had finally managed to sleep through it, but that seemed unlikely given the months and months he hadn’t been able to.

It was when he was taking his lunch break at work that he noticed Lance had texted him back.Recently, too.The timestamp could’ve told him that, but in all honesty, he’d been checking his phone more than he should’ve.Enough for Matt to notice and comment on it. 

Sitting back against the wall at the back of the restaurant, where the smokers liked to hang out on their tens—though none were around now—Keith picked through what Matt had made him, grabbing a strawberry and sticking it in his mouth, before opening up his phone and reading just what Lance had sent him.

_L: I KNOW I’M SO ASHAMED_

_L: I was so fucking late this morning, though.It was either be late or serenade you_

_L: I’ll have you know, it was a close call_

_K: You’re going to have to make it up to me_

_L: Oh yeah?_

_L: What’re you thinking? ;)_

_K: That guitar in your room…can you play it?_

_L: Psh of course_

_K: I expect to be properly serenaded then_

_L: Oh I’m going to serenade the shit out of you_

_L: You’ll be swooning_

_K: Haven’t I told you I don’t swoon?_

_L: Ah, but Keith, you haven’t been serenaded by me_

_K: Jesus_

_L: When do you get off work?_

_K: Six_

_L: Awesome.I’ve got time to plan_

_K: Plan what?_

_L: I can’t just serenade you in my living room_

_K: You can’t?_

_L: NO.Were you born yesterday?_

_L: I have to set the right mood.The Optimal Swoon-worthy Mood_

_K: Oh, so the mood does all the work.I knew it had to be something other than you_

_L: Was that a joke?_

_L: DID FUN-KILLER JUST MAKE A JOKE???_

_K: I am capable, you know_

_L: Could’ve fooled me_

_L: Shit I gotta go_

_K: Texting in class?_

_L: How’d you know?I kind of laughed at your joke and then everyone stared at me and oh shit I’m in even more trouble now.Blow me a good luck kiss_

_K: No_

Feeling a misplaced sense of loss, Keith ate his lunch just as mindlessly as he’d been working all day.Ninety percent of his thoughts were of Lance and it would be the most irritating thing on the earth if Keith didn’t _like_ thinking about Lance.That being said, it was still irritating.Just…middling irritating.

He was so easy to think about was the problem.Keith had already spent at least an hour this morning focused solely on the drag of Lance’s finger against his palm.Just the memory was enough to make Keith’s mouth go dry.It was enough to make him nauseous, too, but he’d been varying degrees of nauseous all day.That actually did suck.They were probably the butterflies Keith had heard so much about and he wondered why they were called butterflies, something beautiful and pleasant due to it's beauty, when in reality, they were a lot more like flies or some other vaguely uncomfortable bug.

He only got halfway through his lunch before he decided he didn’t want the rest.After he wiped off his jeans, removing crumbs, Keith closed his eyes and contemplated sleep.He hadn’t gotten a lot last night because of…and he was already back to Lance.Goddammit.

This thing between them, whatever it was, was going to drive him insane.

Needing a distraction, something to fill his time, Keith picked his phone up from the pavement beside him and called Shiro, hoping he wasn’t at work or in class.It was unlikely, but his schedule shifted so often, there wasn’t a point in memorizing it.

His call was picked up, but by Allura.“Hi, Keith.”

“Hey, where’s Shiro?”

“He’s halfway through a very important reading for his research and has insisted he not be interrupted.Is there anything you’d like me to tell him?You are alright, aren’t you?”

“Yeah, fine.I just wanted to know if he called the mechanic for my bike yet.”

There was a momentary silence and then Allura said, “I’ll ask.Wish me luck.”

“Luck.”

She laughed softly and then the phone crackled as it was set down somewhere.Holding the phone to his ear, Keith scuffed his shoe against the pavement and waited. 

“Yes.He says he has it all handled and you don’t have to worry about a thing.You should be able to ride your motorcycle by the end of the week if you’ve built it correctly.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

Grinning, Keith nodded to himself and then said, “Thanks, Allura.I’ll see you later.”

“Bye, Keith.”

Hanging up, he felt a thrill run through his body.By the end of the week.It had been so long since he’d started building bikes in the hopes of this very moment.If the mechanic cleared it, he’d have actually accomplished something with his life.

He’d get to take Lance out on a ride.

Internally slapping himself, Keith rose from the pavement and headed back to work.His break wasn’t quite over, but he needed to be actively doing something.That was the only way he was going to make it through the rest of this day.

A couple hours later, nearing the end of his shift, Pidge came into the diner, backpack slung over her shoulder and her mouth in a thin, disapproving line.She rarely came in on weekdays and when their eyes met, Keith looking up as he set down plates of food in front of a family of four, he knew she was hear for him.Unceremoniously setting down the last plate, he smiled fleetingly and then fled to the kitchen.“Shit,” he mumbled, scanning his surroundings for a place to hide.Unfortunately, nothing was big enough to hide his entire body and he’d captured the attention of most of the staff.Some would keep his secret, but most wouldn’t.Resigning himself, Keith slumped against a counter and crossed his arms over his chest. 

The door to the kitchen swung open and Pidge stomped in.Pushing her glasses up her nose, she glared at him and said, “I had to hear from Hunk!  Hunk.My best friend finally gets his shit together and actually goes out with the guy he’s been pining after and I have to hear from Hunk.I have been suffering, Keith.I deserved better than that.” 

“Suffering seems…”

“Suffering.I endured hours of whining.Hours.”

Glancing around the kitchen, he saw most everyone studiously ignoring them, except Matt, who was giggling to himself as he grilled sandwiches.“Sorry,” Keith mumbled.

She stared at him suspiciously and he declared, “I am!I was going to tell you, I swear.I just…”

“What?”

“Wanted it to be mine for awhile.I guess.”Not that it could’ve ever been just his, what with Shiro and Allura and Lance’s inability to keep his goddamn mouth shut.

At that, Pidge broke into a devious smile.“Oh my god, you are so whipped.”

“Lord,” Keith whispered.

She crowded him against the counter and started poking him in the stomach and sides, singing, “Keith and Lance sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g.First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes…”

“Stop.”

“No.”She finished the song and started it up again.Wriggling away from her, which was a lot more difficult than it sounded, Keith went back to the floor and started clearing plates.Of course, he had to go back to the kitchen, and when he did, Pidge and Matt were laughing together.

“So are you going to tell me what happened?” Pidge asked him.

“No.”

“You’re being a baby.”

“I’m alright with that,” Keith said, dumping the plates in the industrial sink.

“Goddamn it, Keith.”

“Should’ve known better than poking me,” he said, returning determinedly to work.Pidge did stay in the diner as he did, but she didn’t bug him much after that, keeping to herself, probably getting some homework done.When he was off, however, she bounded up from her table and followed him out.

“Walking me home?”

“No.Just till Oak.” 

Nodding, Keith stuffed his hands in his pockets and felt the excitement and nausea that had mostly dissipated with the arrival of Pidge come back in full force.He was almost home and Lance was there.He must’ve smiled, because when he caught Pidge’s eye, she was smirking at him.

“Guess he likes you, huh?”

“Yeah,” Keith said.“Guess so.”

“Did you give him the letter?”

“Yeah.”

“Told you you would,” she said.

“I told you so.   That's nice.”

Pidge cackled and leaped up onto his back without warning.Managing to catch her legs in time, Keith hiked her up.Her chin landed on his shoulder and she said, “You seeing him tonight?”

“Think so.”

“You’re not going to stop hanging out with me, are you?”

“Never.”

“Good answer, Kogane,” Pidge said.“Because if I thought that was going to happen, I’d have to buy a kitten or something.”

“Drastic measures.”

“It would get you into my house.”

“That’s true,” Keith said.“Kittens are the one good thing about this planet.”

“Kittens and Lance.”

“Shut up.”

She laughed again and tightened her arms around his neck.They were silent for awhile and then Keith said, “Found any good insect facts recently?”

“Oh, probably.”

“So what have we moved on to?”

“Trees.”

“Well, that’s fucking weird,” Keith said.

“Nobody asked you.”

“Fine.Give me a tree fact.”

“In forests, there’s fungal connections between tree roots—doesn’t matter the species—and it’s called the mycorrhizal network.They can share nutrients with each other and stuff.It’s pretty cool.It’s like one big, giant commune, you know?”

“That’s more interesting than I was expecting.”

“It’s science, Keith.It’s always interesting.”

“According to you.”

“According to anyone sane,” Pidge said, slipping down from his back.They’d reached Oak Street.Punching him on the arm, she continued by saying, “Come over tomorrow.Matt bought a new video game I want to steal and try.”

“Okay.”

“Awesome,” Pidge said, waving as she strolled off down the street perpendicular to his.Waving back, Keith walked the rest of the way home alone, trying not to obsess over whether or not Lance would be waiting for him against the wall between their apartments.

He wasn’t.A swell of disappointment flooded Keith and he fought it down, figuring he should eat something, anyway.It wasn’t like they had to spend every free second together. 

Pausing halfway through the door, Keith asked himself if that was something he really wanted.When he realized that maybe it was, he hurried the rest of the way into the apartment, closed the door, and swore to himself he wouldn’t do any such thing.

“Hey, mullet-head.”

Looking towards the living room, Keith saw Lance on the couch, reading something.  When he set down the book, Keith realized it was the Vonnegut book he'd just finished reading.  He must've left it on the table last night.  “Of course you’re here,” Keith murmured, heading into the kitchen to find something to eat.“Where’s Shiro?”

“Taking a shower.He said there was leftovers in the fridge and that you should feed me.”

“Did he?”

“Well, not that last part, but I still think you should feed me.Hunk is out with Shay tonight and when Hunk is out with Shay, I starve,” Lance said.

“Yeah, that doesn’t surprise me,” Keith replied, opening up the fridge and finding tupperware filled with some sort of pasta.There was lots of something green in it, but that was typical of Shiro’s food and it always tasted fine, so Keith wasn’t worried.

Grabbing two bowls from the cupboard by the microwave, Keith filled one halfway.He was about to turn and ask how much Lance wanted, when arms snaked around his waist.Flinching violently, Keith barely managed to stop himself from stabbing Lance in the face with his fork.Quickly, the arms retreated and Keith closed his eyes, feeling a pang of guilt.He’d just been caught off guard. 

“Um…how much do you want?”

“More than the measly serving you gave yourself, that’s for sure,” Lance said lightly.

Nodding, Keith did as he was asked and then stuck that one in the microwave first.Taking a deep breath, he turned and stared at Lance warily, hoping he wasn’t offended.He didn’t appear to be, though he was on the other side of the kitchen, fingers messing with the hem of his shirt.

The silence quickly grew palpably tense and in a burst of motion and noise, Lance moved forward and said, “I’m sorry.I don’t really know what I was thinking, except that I’ve kind of been thinking about you all day and then you were there and your hair is up in that damn ponytail and I’m kind of a touchy person and it seemed like a good way to welcome you home from work or something, which is ridiculous in hindsight, because we’re not like officially a couple or anything.And, well, it’s only been…”

“Lance,” Keith interrupted.“Stop.It’s fine.I just wasn’t expecting it.”

“It’s fine?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh, thank god.I don’t want to scare you away or something.”

Keith almost laughed, the very idea of being scared away was that preposterous.He wasn’t going to tell Lance that though, despite the voice in the back of his head that sounded distinctly like Shiro, saying he should, that no harm would come from it. 

The microwave beeped and Keith pulled out the plate, handing it to Lance.Pointing to a drawer by the sink, Keith said, “There’s silverware in there.”

Placing his plate into the microwave, Keith started it up and then pivoted to watch as Lance collected a fork from the drawer and took a bite of the pasta.“Not bad,” he said after he swallowed.“Shiro’s not Hunk, but no one really is.”Then he set his plate on the counter and approached Keith.“So…do you want a welcome home hug?”

“This isn’t even your apartment.”

“Maybe home is a person, Keith.”

“If it was, that person wouldn't be you.”

“Ouch,” Lance smiled, taking another step forward, his smile transforming from light and teasing to optimistically cautious.It was sweet and Keith nodded, unsure what his voice would sound like if he tried to speak.

Lance slid his arms around Keith’s shoulders and pulled him in close.Keith’s nose landed in the crook of Lance’s neck and he breathed in, liking whatever cologne Lance was wearing. 

“You can hug back, you know.”

“Huh?”

“Well, I don’t know, man.Your arms are just hanging at your side, which is chill, but, you know…it might be less weird if you hug me back.”

“I was getting there,” Keith mumbled, shuffling closer and wrapping his arms around Lance’s waist.His face was still pressed into Lance’s neck and he wasn’t sure if that was weird or not, so he hooked his chin over Lance’s shoulder instead.

At first, it was terribly bizarre.Keith’s skin was crawling and he felt intensely vulnerable, as if hugging was something he could do wrong or if, by doing so, Lance could read his thoughts.But then, the panicked thoughts started to settle and Keith pressed even closer, as close as he could, and sighed shakily, closing his eyes.It was nice.So nice.Lance was warm and unmoving, more than capable of keeping Keith stable.“So, how was work?” Lance asked, voice quiet, hanging in the bubble they’d made.

“Fine.Pidge came and yelled at me because I didn’t tell her about you and she had to hear from Hunk.”

“Was I not supposed to say anything?”

“It’s not a big deal.”

“You wouldn’t lie to me would you, Kogane?”

“No,” Keith said.

A beep sounded behind them and Keith frowned.That was his signal to move and carry on like he went around hugging people everyday, but he desperately didn’t want to move. 

Lance’s hand moved to cup the back of his neck, fingers playing with the wisps of hair that didn’t fit in his ponytail, only making it harder to move away.It was then that Keith realized once the floodgates opened, it would be like this all the time between them.Lance was touchy and Keith needed to be touched.

That realization was enough to get Keith to step away, keeping his eyes downcast.Walking to the microwave, he grabbed his food, the fork from the tupperware, and then took a huge bite of pasta.There was chicken, corn, and the green something.It tasted good, so whatever the green something was hardly mattered.

“Want to watch something?” Keith asked.

“Sure,” Lance replied.

They sat down on the couch, a couple of inches apart, and Keith flipped the TV on, immediately handing the remote off to Lance.

“I get to pick?”

“Yeah.I don’t care much what we watch.” 

“Excellent,” Lance said, opening up the guide and scanning the options.As he did, his leg started bouncing up and down.

“What?” Keith asked.

“What what?”

“You’re fidgeting.”

“Oh, yeah, I do that,” Lance said, shrugging.

“You do that when you’re nervous about something.”

“Been watching me, Kogane?” Lance smirked, eyes briefly deserting the screen in favor of Keith.

“You know the answer to that.”

The response surprised Lance, his eyes going wide.Suddenly they were staring at each other and this was what Keith had been trying to avoid earlier, because now that he was staring into Lance’s sapphire blue eyes, it was impossible to do anything else.They reminded Keith of moonlit skies.Losing complete control of his mouth and brain, Keith mumbled, “We should go stargazing sometime.Just you and me.”

Lance’s eyes dropped to his lips.Keith’s heart went wild.

Clearing his throat, Lance nodded.“Uh…yeah.Stargazing.Sounds cool.”Then he flushed and looked back to the TV, leaving Keith desperate, wondering what Lance would taste like, if his lips would be soft or rough, if Keith would tragically embarrass himself with his complete lack of experience.

Hoping that someday they would get past this nervous and painfully unsure stage, Keith turned his gaze to the TV and noticed Lance was clicking on _Naked and Afraid_.

“Oh, fuck no.”

“I thought I could watch whatever I wanted.”

“Within reason.”

“You totally didn’t specify, mullet-head,” Lance said, settling back into the couch.

“This is one of the dumbest shows in existence.”

“Have you even seen it before?”

Sighing heavily, Keith slumped into the couch and crossed his arms over his chest.Glaring at the TV, featuring a woman who was naked and attempting to build shelter, he tried to come up with a response to that that wouldn’t immediately lose him the argument.Unfortunately, he took too long.“Oh my god,” Lance said, “You totally haven’t.I can’t believe you’re one of those people.Actually, I take it back, I can.”

“It’s literally called _Naked and Afraid_.In what universe is that going to be good?”

“Sit tight, Kogane.I’ll convert you.” 

“Like hell.”

Scooting closer to him on the couch, Lance said, “See, the great thing about this show is that these people are super intense and kind of awesome and you couldn’t do half of what they do, but they’re also naked, so you’re still convinced their dumb as shit.Really represents the duality of man.Or woman.”

“Awesome,” Keith said sarcastically.

“Be open to the possibilities.You might surprise yourself.”

“I don’t want to surprise myself.”

Lance laughed.“I’m going to transform your motherfucking world, baby.”

“Now there’s a line.”

“Did it work?”

“Nope.”

“Liar,” Lance breathed, curling his fingers into a mock spider, skipping them up Keith’s thigh, side, then into his neck, making Keith curl up and slap Lance’s hand away.

Shiro’s bedroom door opened behind them and Lance moved away, slipping his hands into his lap and smiling at Shiro innocently.“And how was the shower, Shiro?”

“Good.Is that _Naked and Afraid_?”

“Yep.Wanna watch?”

“Keith is watching?”

Lance grinned.“I can be very convincing.”

“I’m not actually convinced,” Keith mumbled, still glaring at the TV.

Laughing, Shiro settled into the chair beside them, ruffling his hair with his towel.“Dinner alright?” he asked.

“So good.Magnifico.Superb.Absolutely scrumptious,” Lance said.

Knowing he would go for as long as he could come up with words, Keith interrupted him.“Not as good as Hunk’s cooking, apparently.”

“Keith,” Lance whined.

“I believe that,” Shiro smiled.“Hunk sure as hell knows what he’s doing.I’m just kind of making it up as I go.Seems to work alright.”

“Definitely works.”

Looking between the two of them, Shiro said, “I can go, you know.Leave you two alone.I don’t want to interrupt anything.”

“You weren’t interrupting a thing,” Lance said.“I definitely wasn’t trying to come on to Keith.I wouldn’t ever do that.Unless, of course, you have no interest in beating me up for that, because then I’d have to tell you that I was totally trying to come on to Keith and it was totally working.”

“God, you’re so embarrassing,” Keith sighed.“Don’t worry about it, Shiro.We’re going somewhere, anyway.”

Lance lit up.“Oh, yeah!We should do that.Like now, actually.Before it gets dark.”

“You forgot.”

“It’s not my fault!You’re really distracting.Like, I’m not sure you understand quite how distracting you are.”

Rolling his eyes, Keith picked up both his and Lance’s dishes, moving them to the sink.He was about to wash them when Shiro said, “Leave them, Keith.Go have fun.”

“Thanks.Let’s go, Lance.”

“Yep,” Lance said, leaping from the couch.

“When are you going to be back?” Shiro asked.

“I’ll have him back by ten, sir,” Lance said solemnly.

Catching Lance’s hand, Keith tugged him through the door, shouting to Shiro that if anything changed, he would text. 

Stopping at Lance’s apartment, Keith waited outside as Lance hurried in to grab his guitar and then they were off, Lance firmly in the lead, taking Keith out of the apartment and down familiar streets, guitar slung over his shoulder.As they walked, Keith tried to come up with where they could possibly be going.There was a playground near here, a school, a couple abandoned houses high school kids like to smoke weed in.Those didn’t seem like places Lance would take him, though. 

“So,” Lance said, pulling him from his thoughts.

“What?”

“The list.”

“Couldn’t you have forgotten about that, too?” Keith sighed.

“No way.I’m super curious.”

Figuring there wasn't a way out of this one, Keith said, “I may have…snooped.”

Lance gasped loudly, feigning shock and surprise.Briefly, Keith felt a sharp tug of guilt and alarm, but then he glanced over at Lance and saw amusement sparkling in his eyes.Lowering his eyes back to his feet, Keith continued.“It was why…it was why I went home that night.You were flirting with Allura and that was kind of weird and confusing, because I thought…but then there was that list and all the pictures of your family and I realized I cared that you were flirting with people who weren’t me and I…”Blushing, Keith stopped, sure he’d already said too much.

That feeling only increased when silence followed his speech.Wincing, he bit his lip and waited.

Lance’s hand twined with his and tugged them gently to a stop.“What?” Keith snapped.

“Look at me?”

Sighing, Keith did.Unexpectedly, there was fondness and understanding in Lance’s eyes and it made Keith feel wary.Part of that stare was claiming to know Keith and that was terrifying.It was also rare for Lance to be serious like this.“I don’t mind, you know.I one hundred percent would’ve snooped if our roles had been reversed.And I’m sorry about the flirting thing.I didn’t even really think about how you would see that.I just kind of flirt with everyone.Obviously, if that’s a problem, I can stop.I think.But it’s different with you and I think you know that.”

“Yeah, I do.Now.I think.”

“Cool,” Lance smiled.

“You can still flirt or whatever,” Keith said, scuffing his shoe on the pavement.“You shouldn’t have to try to be someone you’re not just because I…”

“Worry needlessly?”

Frowning, Keith started back down the street, crossing his arms over his chest.Behind him, Lance said, “You don’t even know where we’re going!”

“Doesn’t mean I can’t walk.”

Catching up to him, Lance retook the lead.It was silent between them the rest of the way, Keith keeping his eyes focused on his feet and his hands shoved in his pockets.Then a hand landed on his arm and jolted him to stop.Looking up, Keith saw an old, abandoned building in front of them.It was just a giant cement block and Keith was going to ask how this set any kind of mood, but then Lance’s hand slid down his arm and their fingers were locked again and Keith knew it didn’t matter where they ended up because he was with Lance.

Lance led him around the side of the building to a rusty ladder that looked as though it had seen better days.It went all the way up to the roof.Though the building wasn’t all that tall, Keith still felt a spike of apprehension.Noticing, Lance said, “It’s safe, I swear.Hunk and I used to climb up here all the time freshman and sophomore year when we wanted to get drunk.If you do die, I’ll pull a Juliet and kill myself out of grief.It’ll be poetic.Shakespearean.”

“That’s not poetic, it’s dumb.”

“Yeah, true.Forgive me for trying to make you feel better.”

Figuring he should stop trying to fuck up what could be a perfectly nice night, Keith shoved away his fear and started up the ladder, focusing on each step, finding himself surprised at how quickly he reached the top.Pulling himself up, he let out a breath.The view wasn’t anything spectacular, but they were high up and that never failed to take Keith’s breath away.It was pleasant to feel on top of the world.

Then Lance was there and he said, “Pretty cool, huh?”

“It’s kind of dirty,” Keith said, peering at the ground of the roof, trying to find a good place to sit.

“That’s all you’ve got, Kogane?”

God, he needed to stop landing himself in places that demanded apologies.“Sorry,” he said, meeting Lance’s eyes.“It’s really cool.I swear.” 

“Was that so hard?”

“I’m going to kill you.”

“Oh, it’s mutual.”

Huffing, Keith tightened his arms across his chest and said, “Jesus, I’m sorry, alright?I just suck at this.And I’m going to continue to suck at this and if that’s a problem, then I suggest you go and flirt with someone else.”

Sighing, Lance ran a hand through his hair, not ruffling it in the slightest—it was simply too short for that—and said, “Nah, I’m gonna keep flirting with you, if that’s alright.”

“Okay,” Keith said with a small smile, sitting near the edge of the rooftop.“Weren’t you going to serenade me?”

“Yep,” Lance said cheerfully.“Ever heard the 1975?”

“Probably.”

“Okay, well, they’re popular enough that I know them, but they kind of seemed like a band you might be alright with and there’s this one song that’s kind of perfect and it was pretty easy to figure out the chords, so…”

“Just play.”

“God, you’re so demanding,” Lance teased.

“And you talk a lot.”

“Ready to swoon?” Lance said, winking.

“Better start before I toss you off the roof.”

Clearing his throat a couple of times, Lance strummed the guitar and fiddled with the tuning pegs.Keith noticed Lance’s hands were shaking slightly and he bit his lip to keep himself from smiling.Lance was nervous.“Ready?” Lance asked.

“I was born ready, McClain.”

Lance played a chord and let it linger, until the sound of it almost dissipated and then he started to sing, intermittently playing chords, in between gentle beats he hit against his guitar. 

Keith didn’t know the song, but it was soft and acoustic and slow.The lyrics were kind of strange, but it hardly mattered because Lance’s voice was sweet, the high notes of the song easily reached.It had breadth and body and Keith knew that Lance had trained it.Why he sang so dramatically and ridiculously in the shower was beyond Keith, especially when he could sing like this.

When the song reached the chorus, Keith understood why Lance picked this song in particular.It was impossible to miss.

“Don’t you see me?I, I think I’m falling, I’m falling for you.And don’t you need me?I, I think I’m falling, I’m falling for you.And on this night and in this light, I think I’m falling, I’m falling for you.And maybe you change your mind…”

Everything in Keith went still.His ears were hanging onto every note Lance hit, every word he sang, unable to believe that he’d managed to find someone willing to take him to a rooftop and sing him a song that was so fucking romantic it was almost disgusting.

When Lance sang, “Oh, but I want you now.I want you now,” he lifted his eyes from his guitar and stared at Keith, smiling softly at whatever he saw there, before bending his head and playing another chord, the soft curve of his neck catching the light of the setting sun, his skin shimmering.

It was unbelievable and breathtaking.Keith wanted to kiss him.Badly.He wanted to cross the distance between them, forcibly remove Lance’s guitar from his hands, crawl into his lap, and kiss him until the sun was under the horizon.But he also wanted to hear the end of the song, so he folded his hands in his lap and clenched them tightly.

When Lance finished, the last chord hanging in the air, Keith wished he’d just kissed Lance when he’d been willing, because now that the song had ended, the feeling of timelessness had ceased, taking his impulsiveness with it.Now he was just nervous again.

“How good was that?” Lance asked, grinning.

“That was…impressive.”

“Thank you, thank you,” Lance said, bowing at the waist, “I’m actually kind of amazed I played it that well, actually, because I only practiced a couple of times.”

“Wait…you learned that today?”

“Yeah.It’s not like you gave me a whole lot of warning and all of the songs I already knew how to play weren’t good enough.”

“Wow.”

“You’re totally swooning,” Lance said.

“Maybe.”

“Success!”Then Lance whooped loudly, adjusting the strap of his guitar so that it fell across his back, before crawling over and settling right beside Keith, one knee raised so that he had somewhere to rest his chin.

“You’ve taken singing lessons,” Keith said after a stretch of easy silence.

“Yeah, for a couple years.When I was younger, my mom was always desperate to get me and my siblings out of the house, so I was pretty much constantly doing something.For one of those activities, I picked singing.I also played tennis, did some theater, joined a couple of random clubs that mostly just fed me pizza…you know, pretty standard stuff.”

“I read books.”

“That’s it?”

“Pretty much,” Keith said, stretching his legs out.“Played video games.Jogged.I did a whole lot of jogging.It was something Shiro would do with me.”

“Still jog?”

“Less than I used to, but yeah.”

“It’s kind of fucking terrible,” Lance said.

Keith laughed.“I like it.I don’t think while I’m running.Back then, it got me out of the house.”

“I can’t imagine Shiro’s parents actually sucked.I mean, they gave birth to Shiro.”

“Nah, they adopted him, too.They did like him better than they liked me, though.But, honestly, for the most part, they left the both of us alone.Very alone, sometimes.”

“That sucks.”

Keith shrugged.

“It does, man.It totally blows.I couldn’t have made it through a single goddamn day of my life without my family.”

“I had Shiro.”

“Not exactly a parent, though,” Lance said. 

“No.But he tries hard, you know?He didn’t have to.”

“I don’t know.He loves you, doesn’t he?”

“Yeah,” Keith said.

“So I think he probably has to.”

“I guess.”

Nudging his shoulder against Keith’s, Lance said, “That’s kind of how love works, mullet-head.You try, too.I know Shiro doesn’t let you do a goddamn thing, but you keep trying to help him anyway.And you do that because you love him, right?”

“I…yeah.”

“If you tell him that, he might let you help him out sometimes, you know.”

Keith stared at Lance.“I don’t really…do that.”

“I’m just saying.It would probably help the whole complex thing.”

“Complex?”

“Oh, come on, man.It’s so obvious.You’re convinced that Shiro is like twenty times better than you and that everyone is going to automatically like him better, when in reality, Shiro is kind of low-key dying all the time and really needs to work on taking care of himself and you’re more independent than you think.Or, at least, that’s what I think,” Lance said, catching Keith’s unconvinced expression.“Not that it’s any of my business.I’m just gonna shut up now.”

Unsure what to say to that, Keith said, “Play me something else.”Anything to stop Lance from dissecting Keith’s life piece by piece.It was strange, but sort of flattering.Keith had honestly had no idea that Lance was paying that much attention.

“What do you want?”

“Whatever.”

“Alright.Just so you know, you asked for it,” Lance said.Then he started strumming the guitar in quick strokes, launching into “I’ll Make a Man Out of You” from _Mulan_.

When that song was finished, Lance kept playing and Keith didn’t stop him.Lance was the one to stop once dusk hit, insisting he had homework to do.They climbed down from the roof and headed home, Keith making sure to take Lance’s hand in his this time.

Once back at the apartment, Keith stopped in front of Lance’s apartment.“Have fun doing homework.”

Groaning piteously, Lance let his forehead fall onto Keith’s shoulder.“I need to take a class in human anatomy.”

“What does that have to do with engineering?”

Looking up, Lance raised an eyebrow.“Why, absolutely nothing, Kogane.But the homework would sure as hell be more interesting.”

“Why would it…oh,” Keith said, finally catching on.And then he blushed furiously.Why did he always fucking do that?

Snorting, Lance said, “Man, you’re cute.”

“Don’t call me cute.”

“Really, really cute.”

“Go do your goddamn homework and leave me alone.”

“You were welcome to walk away at any point,” Lance said, smirking.

“You’re right,” Keith said, pivoting on his feet and heading towards his apartment.Lance was laughing behind him.When Keith reached his door, he turned his head and watched Lance laugh.It was full-bodied, hand on his stomach, body hunched slightly, shoulders shaking.He was beautiful and Keith suddenly wished he’d swallowed his pride and stayed.

“Hey, mullet-head.”

“What?”

“I’m writing that you swooned in my journal.Aliens will find it in a hundred years and they’ll know that Keith Kogane swooned when I sang to him.Just thought you should know.”

“And those aliens won’t give a fuck.”

“Probably true,” Lance said.“But they’ll _know_.”

Keith rolled his eyes and then placed his hand on the doorknob, ready to open the front door.But then their eyes locked and Lance’s quickly shifted from amused to something else, something that looked a whole lot like want, and Keith’s mind flew back to Lance’s lips.And apparently his mind couldn’t do that without a visual, because his gaze fell unwillingly to said lips, his mouth hanging open slightly.

When he managed to wrench his eyes away, he saw Lance still staring at him and he thought maybe Lance was going to come to him and kiss him absolutely senseless and Keith thought maybe he was going to meet him halfway, but then the doorknob twisted in his hand, door swinging open, and the moment broke.

Blinking, Lance said, “I’ll see you around, Keith.”

“Yeah.See you.”

They both walked into their apartments at the same time and when Keith closed the door behind him, he sighed, cursing himself silently.He should’ve just fucking gone for it and hoped it wasn’t a complete disaster.

Taking out his phone, he leaned against the wall by the door and texted Pidge.

_K: I think Lance wanted to kiss me and I wanted to kiss him, but I definitely didn’t get kissed.How the fuck do I make that happen?_

_P: Yeah, this is already too much information._

_K: Says the girl who yelled at me for not telling her anything_

_P: I just like to be informed of major events in your life.   Because you’re my best friend._

_K: This is a major event in my life_

_P: No.It isn’t._

_P: Okay, fine, you dramatic loser, I know what you’re thinking and maybe it is, but this is not a major life event I want to be clued into._

_P: And my advice is to just fucking kiss him._

_K: Yeah, cuz that’s easy_

_P: I mean?Yeah?_

_K: As if you’d know_

_P: Shouldn’t have asked me then, huh?_

_K: Ugh_

_K: You think I should ask Shiro_

_P: Better him than me._

_K: I’ll just figure it out, I guess_

_P: Wonderful idea._

_P: Anything else?_

_K: Yeah.You’re the worst best friend ever_

_P: So you’ve said.Night, Keith._

_K: Night_

_P: I do love you, dumbass.And congrats on finding someone who wants to kiss you._

_K: Yeah, thanks_

Slipping his phone into his pocket, Keith found Shiro on the couch, head tilted back and snoring lightly.There was a huge-ass book in his lap, the print tiny.Picking it up, Keith closed it and set it on the coffee table, before placing a light hand on Shiro’s shoulder.

Jolting awake, Shiro took a second to relax.“Keith,” he said gruffly.“You’re back.”

“Yeah.”

“What time is it?”

“Uh…almost ten.”

“Oh, good.Still early.”Then he reached to the coffee table and picked up the book, cracking it open as though he hadn’t just been asleep. 

Thinking back to what Lance had said on the rooftop, Keith said, “Are you low-key dying all the time?”

Shiro glanced up at him and smiled.“No, I’m fine.What gave you that idea?”

“Lance.”

“I’m perfectly alright, Keith.”

Frowning, Keith crossed his arms over his chest and said, “I think we mean the exact same thing when we say we’re fine.”

“Keith…”  
  
“Let me help,” Keith murmured.“I can kind of cook, I can go to the grocery store, I can pay for the insurance on my bike, I can meet the mechanic whenever he’s coming, I can do all sorts of things, Shiro. You shouldn’t be falling asleep on the couch before ten.”

“You don’t need to do any of those things.”

“I think Lance is right.I think you’re killing yourself.”

Sighing, Shiro leaned back into the couch and set his book aside.“Keith, drop it.”

“No.”

“Listen, I’m taking care of you.That’s all there is to it.It’s something I have to do and I need you to understand that.”

“I do,” Keith said.“But you can’t keep this up forever and I can help.I…I need you and I’m not going anywhere, but for fuck’s sake, let me do something.You’re not my dad.You’re my brother.If you’re taking care of me, I should be taking care of you.”

There was a long silence and then Shiro nodded.“Okay,” he whispered.“You can do the shopping and some of the cooking.I’m kind of tired of doing your laundry, so you could do that, too.And, uh…you can pitch in on rent if you want.But nothing for the bike, okay?That’s a gift for you.”

It wasn’t perfect, but it was something.“Sounds good,” Keith said.

“And you could hang out with me tonight.Just put something on the TV.It won’t disturb me.”

“Okay.”Keith sat down on the couch and did as Shiro asked, finding repeats of _Modern Family_ that were on the entire night.He wouldn’t have to change the channel.

“Keith?”

“Yeah?”

“I love you.”

“Yeah, I love you, too,” Keith said, the words strange but not unpleasant.

Looking over at Shiro, Keith saw a small smile on his face as his eyes traveled across the page of his book, a pen underlining something.Shaking his head slightly, Keith grabbed his phone and texted Lance.

_K: Turns out you’re not a complete idiot_

_L: I have no idea what this is about, but I’m glad you’ve seen the light_

_L: Now, as much as I love talking to you, I really have to do this homework or I will be fucked tomorrow.So, as you would say, go away_

_K: Yeah yeah.Night, Lance_

_L: Night_

_L: Oh, hey, can I ask you something?_

_K: Do your fucking homework, McClain_

_L: Fine.I’ll ask you tomorrow_

_K: I look forward to it_


	9. Chapter Nine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why does she keep writing fluff, you ask? I don't have a fucking answer. I'm such complete trash. I promise, I have a plan for angst, but apparently, it just couldn't happen yet.  
> Anyway, thank you all for the comments and the love. Not to sound like a broken record, but it means a lot.  
> And to Camille, who is the sun and stars combined.  
> Enjoy! <3

Keith woke up to Lance singing “Call Me Maybe”.It felt early.Too early.Groaning, Keith rolled over and found his phone, checking the time.Seven.That had to be wrong.Blinking a couple of times, Keith focused back on the lit up screen.It was in fact seven.7:03, to be specific.“Oh, fuck no,” Keith mumbled, sitting up in bed and slamming his hand against the wall.

The song cut off, Lance choosing to laugh instead.“Morning, babe,” he shouted.

Roiling with anger, Keith got out of bed and stomped out of his room, heading for the apartment door.Shiro was awake, writing something on a piece of paper.Noticing Keith, he said, “Off to kill your boyfriend?”

“He’s not my boyfriend.”

“Whatever you say.”

Flipping Shiro off, Keith left and slapped his hand against the door of Lance’s apartment.Hunk opened the door, grinning, with a spatula in hand.“I can’t believe he was right.”

“What?” 

“Oh, uh…well, Lance thought if he sang too early, you might come over here to yell at him.”

“Oh my god,” Keith said, embarrassed that he’d been so predictable.

“But,” Hunk said hurriedly, “That was part of the plan, man.Why don’t you, uh, come in and maybe look less angry and terrifying?I’m just the messenger.And the guy who’s cooking your breakfast.”

“I don’t want breakfast.I want to be asleep.”

“Please?You can just stand and brood if you want, but like, stay, because I don’t want to tell Lance you came and left.He’d whine at me for hours.”

For a minute, Keith didn’t speak, wondering if he should go back to his room and change into something other than sweatpants and a long tee.But then he remembered that Hunk was literally standing right in front of him and the very idea of Hunk knowing Keith was the type to change clothes to impress made Keith say, “Yeah, fine,” and follow Hunk inside, closing the door behind him.

It smelled amazing in the apartment and Keith found himself reluctantly curious.Walking into the kitchen, Keith saw all the necessary ingredients for french toast laid out, along with a bowl of fruit, and freshly cooked bacon on a paper towel by the stove.“Do you guys eat like this all the time?” Keith asked, snatching a piece of bacon and wandering towards the couch, only to notice the small white table laden with plates and flowers.Someone had planned this and it screamed Lance.

Which was why Hunk’s answer didn’t surprise him.“Hell no.Cereal is a lot easier, but he wanted to do something for you.”

“Looks like you’re doing most of it.”

Hunk shrugged.“I’m just making sure the food is edible.He set the table, got the flowers, and cut the fruit.He’s kind of been up a long time so, you know, go easy on him.”

“Would’ve been nice if he’d asked,” Keith mumbled, finding himself more pleased than he wanted to.In fact, horrifyingly, he’d just stroked a petal of one of the flowers.Stepping back, Keith moved to lean against the wall by Lance’s door to wait.

“What’re you doing?” Hunk asked.

“I’m going to scare the shit out of him.”

“Cool," Hunk shrugged.

“Why are you doing this for him, anyway?”

“He’s my best friend,” Hunk said simply.“I mean, I’ll be real, I super didn’t want to, but when he asks, I don’t say no.It’s easier to just go along with whatever he’s doing.”

“Well, thanks.”

Hunk smiled.“No problem-o.How many slices of french toast do you want?”

“Three?”

“Got it.”

They both heard the shower shut off and Keith went silent.He waited and waited and waited, silently cursing Lance for taking so goddamn long.His skin would survive a day without whatever beauty routine he’d designed for it.

Eventually, the door opened and Keith pressed himself closer to the wall, holding his breath.Lance came out, not noticing Keith, and he was about to say something, when Keith lept out in front of him, shouting, “Boo, asshole.”

Lance let out a bloodcurdling scream, jumping backwards, hands flying to his chest.It was high-pitched and ridiculous and Keith immediately started laughing, bending over and holding his stomach. 

“Fuck you, Kogane,” Lance managed.It only made Keith laugh harder, silent, heaving laughs, tears threatening to spill out of the corners of his eyes.He didn’t know what reaction he’d been expecting, but what he got was so much better than he’d imagined.

Lance slapped him hard on the arm.“I try and give you nice things and this is how you repay me?Betrayal!” 

If Keith was braver, if he still wasn’t upset about being up this early, he would’ve grabbed the collar of Lance’s collar and tugged him into a kiss.It certainly would’ve shocked him.Instead, he wiped his eyes and said, “How do you do with scary movies?”

“Just fine, thank you,” Lance said, puffing out his chest.

Cracking, Keith was laughing again.Apparently, Lance was prepared this time, though, because he moved into Keith’s space and said, “Guess what I just found out mullet-head?”

“What?” Keith choked out.

“Your laugh might just be the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard.”

Abruptly, Keith stopped laughing.Straightening, he saw Lance smiling down at him, not a note of smugness in his face, which, honestly, was what Keith had expected.Only a couple more inches and they would be kissing.Rolling forward onto his toes, Keith stared at Lance’s lips, slightly glistening from some kind of lip balm, and considered…

“I’ve got two slices of french toast ready for whoever gets here first,” Hunk said.

In a flash, Lance was gone, barreling towards the kitchen.Keith just stood and stared at the space where Lance had been for a moment, not quite believing he might’ve actually been ready and Lance was the one who’d fled.Or maybe it had just been for food.

Shaking his head, Keith saw Lance already at the table, two slices of french toast on his plate.He was about to pour syrup on them, when Keith sat across from him and said, “Wasn’t this all for me?”

“Was,” Lance said, pouring the syrup.“But then you scared the shit out of me.”

“That was payback for waking me up so goddamn early.Just because I’ve decided to put up with you, does not mean I’ll let you do whatever you want.”

“I’m not sure swooning as I serenade you qualifies as putting up with me.”

“I didn’t swoon.” 

“It’s in my journal, Keith, and my journal never lies,” Lance said, shoveling large chunks of french toast into his mouth.

“He actually did write it down,” Hunk said, crashing into the chair beside Keith.“Showed me.He needed a witness or something.”

“Why does that not surprise me?” Keith said dryly.

Lance grinned at him around a mouthful of french toast.It was absolutely disgusting, but Keith found himself smiling back, a soft, fluttering warmth settling in his stomach. 

Swallowing, Lance said, “Careful.If you keep looking at me like that, I might fall in love with you.”

Keith rolled his eyes, while Hunk groaned.Immediately, they started talking about Lance’s inability to keep his mouth shut and Lance’s expression slowly soured, until he let his fork clatter to his plate and said, “Fine, I get it.I’ll just stop flirting with Keith.Forever.That’s what you both want, isn’t it?”

That wasn’t at all what Keith wanted and as he said, “As if you could stop,” he wished desperately that he didn’t have to rise to every challenge that Lance dealt out.It would be so much easier if he could just swallow his pride every once in awhile.

“Oh, I can stop.I’ll show you, Kogane.”And that was why he couldn’t stop.That little flash of amusement and competition in Lance’s eyes.It was addicting.

“Lance, no one wants that,” Hunk said, sounding appropriately ashamed, the way Keith wished he could.“It’s just, well, a little much for breakfast, don’t you think?”

Lance glared at him and Hunk stood.“Might be burning,” he mumbled, before fleeing to the kitchen. 

Wordlessly, Lance went back to his french toast, staring at Keith as he did.It was unsettling and Keith shifted in his chair, glancing down at the table and wishing he had his own french toast just so he had something to do.

When Hunk returned, he had four slices of french toast this time and he put two on Keith’s plate and then two on his.Before he sat down, he circled behind Lance’s chair and gave him a hug.“Sorry, buddy,” Hunk said.“I love you.”

The slightly disgruntled expression on Lance’s face melted away.Smiling, he said, “Love you, too, man,” and leaned back into the hug, tilting his chair.

How did people do that?Just say they loved each other without thinking about it first?How did the words not get stuck in their throat?

“Keith, you alright?” Hunk asked.

“Uh…yeah,” Keith said, picking up the syrup and pouring a little on his plate.“Fine.”

“He’s just upset I’m not flirting with him anymore.”

“Maybe I would be if I thought you could actually do it.”

“You’d be upset?” Lance asked, eyes going wide.

Keith shrugged, taking a bite of his french toast.“Holy fuck,” he mumbled, flicking his eyes to Hunk.“How are you so good at this cooking thing?”

“Good?”

“Amazing.”

“I’m sorry,” Lance said, putting his hands over Hunk’s face.“We’re busy focusing on me right now.I think you were saying something about how upset you’d be if I stopped flirting with you.”Somehow, Lance managed to keep his eyes on Keith, even though he and Hunk had started having a slapping fight.

“I said maybe.”

“Oh my god,” Lance said, standing in a rush.Both Keith and Hunk watched as Lance disappeared into his room, coming back seconds later with what looked unmistakably like a journal in hand.He shoved his plate aside and set the journal down in front of him.It fell open where a pen was marking Lance’s place and he picked the pen up, biting down on the end of it, thinking hard.

“Jesus,” Keith breathed.

“You kind of asked for it, man,” Hunk said.

“Dear diary,” Lance said, scribbling along.“Today Keith, the adorable mullet-head, who really doesn’t have the decency to realize the effect he has on me, just declared that he likes when I flirt with him.Obviously, it was something I expected seeing as he keeps holding my hand and making these cute blushy faces, but I thought it was worth noting.For the aliens, of course.Sup, aliens?Hope it’s kicking.”

“Feel better?” Keith drawled.

“Much,” Lance said brightly, setting down the pen and eating the rest of his french toast.He was miraculously slow, what with his talking and writing.Keith was already almost done with his two slices.

When Lance spotted he had some left, he grabbed the seat beside Keith and started diving his fork in, trying to steal some.

“Dude,” Hunk said, “food is sacred.”

“Keith _likes_ me.He doesn’t mind.Right, Keith?”

“Stay away from my food or I’ll stab you.”

Leaning forward, Lance flooded his field of vision, his blue eyes sparkling.“I don’t think you’d stab me,” he murmured.There was a furious flush on his cheeks, but he managed to keep his eyes on Keith’s.He leaned closer and closer until their lips were almost touching.Keith was so sure everyone in the room could hear his heartbeat it was so loud.God, Lance smelled amazing. 

Keith only noticed that Lance had stolen the last bit of french toast Keith had when it was dangling from his mouth.Cackling, he fell back into his chair and started eating it, winking at Keith.

Keith wanted to scream _just fucking kiss me_ , but instead, he turned to Hunk and said, “Is he ticklish?”

Hunk flicked his eyes between the two of them, considering.Beside him, Lance was shaking his head furiously.Smiling, Keith said, “Where?”

“Feet.Under the knees,” Hunk murmured, before leaping out of his chair and hurrying into his room.

“I can’t believe this,” Lance shouted after him.“Two betrayals in one day.And it’s only eight!”When he noticed Keith extending his hands, he slipped out of his chair and said, “No way in fucking hell you’re touching me.”

Without another word, they were tearing through the apartment, Keith trying to catch Lance, who kept throwing pillows at him to fend him off.They were both agile and quick, but Keith had the advantage of being on the offensive and being willing to do stupid shit like leaping over the tops of couches.Eventually, Keith managed to pin him in a corner and Lance held a pillow in front of his body, waving it around to keep Keith away.

“A pillow isn’t all that scary,” Keith said, smirking.

The smell of something burning briefly distracted them, but before either one of them commented, Hunk came out of his room screaming.He started wrestling french toast off the griddle, while whining, “I haven’t burned something in months.”

As Keith watched him, a pillow hit him in the side of the face.Returning his attention to where it should’ve been the entire time, Keith said, “Ready to die, McClain?”

“Bring it,” Lance said, ready to strike with the pillow again.

Closing in, Keith allowed the pillow to hit him in the stomach and then he gripped Lance’s shoulders hard, forcing him around and shoving him hard onto the couch.Straddling him quickly, definitely knocking the breath from Lance, Keith beat back Lance’s hands and waited for an opening to strike.

“Guys,” Hunk said, “can’t we just go back to eating breakfast?”

Ignoring Hunk, Keith saw his opportunity.Lance was trying to spot Hunk and paying less attention than he should.Reaching behind him, Keith found the crook underneath Lance’s knee and started to wiggle his fingers.

Immediately, Lance started to laugh breathlessly, attempting to shove Keith off of him.Leaning in, Keith said, “That’s for stealing my food.”Then he pecked Lance on the cheek and slid off, heading for the kitchen.When he looked back, he saw Lance still lying on the couch, breathing hard and blinking.

It felt like a victory until Keith was leaning against the counter and watching Hunk cook more french toast.What he’d done hit him and he felt his cheeks warm.He’d fucking straddled Lance.On the couch.In a place that wasn’t his.In front of Hunk. 

It only got worse when Lance finally managed to find his way over.Unsurprisingly, he approached Keith, moving right back into his personal space as though it was where he belonged.Honestly, Keith wouldn’t have minded if he decided to never leave.“Did I just hallucinate, or did Keith Kogane just run around my apartment, looking absolutely ridiculous, all for the sake of fun?”

“It’s been known to happen,” Keith said, feeling more breathless than when he’d been chasing Lance.This was getting fucking ridiculous.

“You know, I’ve been meaning to ask you something.”

“So you said.”

Shifting his voice even lower, Lance said, “What’s your favorite kind of cheese?”

Keith blinked at him.“Are you serious?”

Lance laughed.“Not really, no.Well, I mean, yes, I’d like to know your favorite kind of cheese, because it’s _your_ favorite kind, but that wasn’t my question.”

“Cheddar.”

“God, that’s so boring.What about gouda?Or camembert?Parmesan?Provolone?”

“Cheddar.”

“Fine.Be boring.”

“What was your question?” Keith asked.

“Oh, right,” Lance said, flushing.“Well, I was kind of going to…fuck it.Will you be my boyfriend?Also, how do you feel about pet names?Because I’m going to use them all the time unless they make you feel weird.”

“Uh…”Keith knew he had an answer for both of those questions somewhere, but they’d disappeared.His mind had frozen.Most of his brain was devoted to screaming, _someone wants to be your boyfriend_ , over and over again.Then his brain realized something important and shifted the sentence to: _Lance wants to be your boyfriend_.

“Dude, I’m freaking out right now.You’ve gotta give me something.”

“I told you, man, time and place,” Hunk said from behind them.“He’s probably not even functional.It is early.”

“He just chased me around the living room!”  
  
“Stop talking about me like I’m not here,” Keith snapped.

“And to no one’s surprise, he can still argue.”

“Well, it’s rude.”

“Not as rude as completely ignoring a question.Excuse me, I guess you did say ‘uh’.That’s really eloquent.”

“I’m just fucking thinking, Jesus.”

“You shouldn’t have to think about it,” Lance argued.

“I shouldn’t have to think about it?Do you think I know how to be in a relationship?Do you think this is just a fucking walk in the park for me?I don’t know what the hell I’m doing, Lance.So, yeah, I’d like to take like five minutes to think about it.”

“I don’t know what the hell I’m doing, either.”

“I promise, you know a lot more than I do,” Keith huffed, turning his face away and glaring at the cupboards.He did notice that Hunk had disappeared.Again.There was a plate of freshly cooked french toast on the counter, though.

“You don’t know what the hell I know.”

“I’ll think about it.”

“Fine.You do that.”

“I will!”

Lance rolled his eyes, eyes flaming, and stomped over to the french toast, eating one plain while he glared at Keith.Still high on the adrenaline that came with raising his voice, Keith turned and walked straight out of the apartment and back to his.

As he showered and got ready for work, he realized how pointless all of that had been.Lance had yelled because he’d felt vulnerable and Keith had yelled because he was an idiot.He knew the answer and so did Lance. 

Five minutes before he was supposed to leave, he debated going over to Lance’s and seeing if he was still around.But he decided there simply wasn’t enough time, so he waited the five minutes, and then left for work.

 

Work was long and slow and awful.Keith spent all of it cursing himself and wondering why Lance could do that to him in an instant and without even trying.

That ended up being a relatively easy problem to work out.The answer just didn’t satisfy Keith was all.He was going to have to be open and honest.He was going to have to apologize.Again.

Once work was over and he’d gotten home, even managing some small talk with Shiro, Keith was lying on his bed, listening to music on his computer and trying to work up the courage to go talk to Lance.It was a lot harder when he wasn’t feeling stupidly impulsive.If only that was something he could invoke it, like a spell with just a few simple words or a hand movement.It could get him in trouble, but it would give him what he needed for this situation.

Then a song came on.It was a song he hadn’t heard in ages, that he’d probably downloaded in one of his binge downloading sessions, and the impulsiveness hit.It was perfect.It was exactly what he needed.

Reaching for his phone, Keith attempted to find the song there, hoping he’d transferred it over.When it became clear he hadn’t, he just grabbed his computer, headphones still dangling from it, and headed out of the apartment, thankful that Shiro was in the shower, and not present to witness this.

Taking a deep breath, Keith knocked on the door.Hunk answered it and Keith let out a sigh of disappointment, wondering why it was never Lance who opened the goddamn thing.Hunk’s eyebrows scrunched up and he said, “Why do you have your computer?”

“Long story.Where’s Lance?”

“Uh…out.”

“Out?” 

“Well…” Hunk seemed to melt under his gaze and he looked over his shoulder and shouted, “Lance, I can’t lie to him.I can’t do it.”

“Just let me in,” Keith sighed, rolling his eyes.

“He’s in his room.Moping.”

“You didn’t need to add the moping bit,” Lance yelled.“Traitor.”

“He’s still not over me telling you where he’s ticklish.”

“Go figure.”

“My point is, he’s kind of, uh…well, good luck,” Hunk said, retreating to his own room. 

Slowly approaching Lance’s room, Keith rapped on the wall beside the door, since it was open and Lance could very well see him.Lolling his head to the side, Lance said, “Go away.”

“No.”

“Why do you have your computer?” Lance asked, his face crinkling in confusion.

Seeing an opportunity, Keith strolled into the room and put his computer on Lance’s lap.“I’ve got a song I want you to listen to.Reminded me of you.”

“Is it depressing?”

“No.You might even like it.”

That was enough to get Lance interested.Sitting up, he gestured for Keith to play the song.Reaching over, Keith tugged out the headphones and then double clicked on “Talk Too Much” by COIN.The pop-y, summertime beat started and Keith said, “Can I sit?”

“I guess,” Lance said, staring at the screen of Keith’s computer.

The closer they approached to the chorus, the faster Keith’s heart started to beat.Then they were there.The smooth, confident voice sang, “You know I talk too much.Honey, come put your lips on mine and shut me up.We can blame it all on human nature.Stay cool, it’s just a kiss, oh why you gotta be so talkative…”

Steeling himself, Keith looked up at Lance, who was no longer looking at the screen but straight at him.Keith held his gaze through sheer determination, attempting to make it obvious that this song had a lot to do with their present situation.His insides felt like a writhing pile of mush.

It was Lance who averted his eyes back to the screen.

When the song ended, it was silent for a moment.Lance paused whatever song started playing next and then he swallowed loudly.In a nonchalant voice, or what was an attempt at one, anyway, Lance said, “You trying to tell me something, Kogane?”

“Yeah.”

“What exactly?”

It didn’t come as a surprise that Lance was actually going to make him say it.Riding his last bit of adrenaline, Keith said, “I’m telling you to shut the fuck up and kiss me.”

“Okay, I would just like to state, for the record, that I was not the only one having trouble shutting up this morning when…”

Praying hard to gods he really didn’t believe in, Keith slid his computer out of the way and moved forward, until their faces were inches apart.Abruptly, Lance stopped talking, his eyes falling to Keith’s lips.Getting as far as he had, Keith was now motionless, simply sitting and watching as Lance’s eyes flicked between his eyes and his lips.He was about to demand Lance kiss him, again, when Lance lifted a hand and cupped Keith’s face, brushing a thumb back and forth along his cheekbone.Clearing his throat, but still only managing a choked whisper, Lance said, “So, let me get this straight, you want…”

“Fucking hell,” Keith interrupted, before crossing the spare inches of distance between them and pressing his lips to Lance’s.His stomach jolted hard and it left him breathless.

It hardly mattered, though, because Lance’s lips were soft and below his and just when he thought he was going to have to pull away and leave in a rush, Lance kissed back.It was heady, not just the kiss, but the idea that someone actually wanted to kiss him.

So heady, it quickly became too much.Pulling back, Keith stared down at his lap and sighed when the inevitable flush rose in his cheeks.Lance’s hand fell away.

It was so quiet.Much too quiet.And even though Keith was trying not to worry about it, he was definitely worrying about it.That kiss hadn’t really been anything substantial and he’d missed a little, but surely it hadn’t been bad enough to warrant such a long silence.He supposed he could look up at Lance and see it in his face, but all of Keith’s bravery had been used up.

“Wow,” Lance breathed eventually.

“That bad?” Keith mumbled.

“No.God, no.That was…we really need to do that again.I would say, like, immediately, because there is a large part of my brain telling me that that song is right and we should just fuck everything and make out for like ten years, but we should kind of talk.Maybe.Unless you do just want to make out for ten years, because that’ll probably answer my question.Actually, no it won’t.We’ve got to talk.”

Finally looking at Lance, Keith said, “I’m sorry about this morning.”

Lance shook his head.“No, don’t be.I…I was being an idiot.It’s just that I really like you and when you’re around, I make some questionable decisions.Namely, ones starting with ‘fuck it’. 

“I didn’t mean to ask you to be my boyfriend.I mean, I kind of did.That’s what I’d like, but really, I was just trying to ask what you wanted this to be and I may have gotten overexcited and assumed too much and you had every right to, you know...”

“Yell at you.”

“Yeah, that,” Lance said.

Keith’s first thought was, _well, you did kind of freak out unnecessarily_ , but he stepped back and realized that might make things worse.Besides, he’d freaked out, too.Instead, he simply said, “Yes.”The truth was he’d promised himself he would tell and that was the truth in it’s barest form.

“Yes?”

“I’ll be your boyfriend.”  Remembering the second question, he tacked on, "And pet names are fine.  I guess."

“Wait…really?”

“Yeah.”

“I…”Lance looked down at his fidgeting hands and his voice grew soft and unassuming.“I didn’t expect that, I gotta be honest.”

“Lance, come on.”

Lance shrugged.

Carefully, Keith ran two fingers along Lance’s jawbone, delighting in the warmth of his skin.It settled something in him.“I know I’m shit at this,” he murmured, “but I didn’t think I was this shit.”

“What?”

“I care about you, dumbass.I’m…well, I’m sorry you didn’t know that.”

“You’re getting better at that apology thing,” Lance grinned.

“Don’t make me regret this.”

Nodding seriously, Lance placed a hand on Keith’s neck.“Better start making out with me, then, because I will make you regret it if I keep talking.”

Rolling his eyes, Keith said, “I’m not going to have to give up sarcasm, am I?Because that might be a deal breaker.”

“Huh?”

“I’m not going to regret this,” Keith huffed.“Alright?There’s nothing you could do to make me regret this, so, just…stop being stupid.”

“Okay,” Lance said.“Can I kiss you now?”

“Yeah, alright.”

“Wow, that’s enthusiastic.”

“Sorry I’m not enthusiastic enough for you.”

Lance’s eyes went from amused to thoughtful and fond in a flash.Sliding his hand up Keith’s neck and into his hair, Lance whispered, “At your pace, then.”

Keith had never been more aware of his body.His skin was tingling where Lance was touching him, his heart was beating hard, pumping blood throughout his veins, his hands were resting in his lap, useless and lame, and every inch of him was incredibly tense, his body yearning to lean into Lance, which for some reason, was something Keith felt the need to fight.It was a complete mystery to Keith how people did this like it was no big deal.Maybe it came with practice. 

He felt so intensely vulnerable and it was tearing him apart.It was awhile since he’d spoken or moved, he realized that, but…

There was a gentle tug on his hair.“Hey,” Lance said.“You alright?”

Focusing in on Lance, Keith managed to say, “Fine.”Whether that was true or not was unclear, but the longer he stared at Lance, the easier he could breathe.It was the way he was looking at Keith, warm and affectionate.

“Not gonna lie, you look like you’re about to throw up, and while I’ll find you attractive no matter what you do, it would ruin the mood.”They were still so close, close enough that Lance’s breath was puffing across his face.

“I don’t know how to…I don’t know anything.”

“Well, I could’ve told you that.”

Keith glared at him and Lance laughed, pecking the corner of Keith’s mouth.“Sorry,” he murmured.“Habit.”When he pulled away slightly, he brushed his thumb along Keith’s lower lip.“I promise you, mullet-head, it doesn’t matter if you suck at kissing.”

“Because you’re so good at it, right?”

“And he steals my joke.”

Sighing, Keith slid away from Lance and crawled to the other side of the bed, flopping down and staring at the ceiling.Apparently, Lance had to make everything difficult.Or maybe he was the one making it difficult.It occurred to Keith that they probably both were.

“Okay, I’m done,” Lance said, lying down beside him, propping himself up on his hand.“You want the truth?The truth is it doesn’t matter if you suck at kissing, because you can’t.If I get to have my tongue in your mouth, that’s good enough for me.”

“Did you have to say it like that?” Keith groaned.

“You can put your tongue in my mouth, too.” 

“I don’t deserve this.”

Laughing, Lance started to press butterfly kisses up and down his face.They were light enough to tickle and Keith tried to bat him away unsuccessfully.Instead, he ended up laughing, rolling over so that he could do it into Lance’s shoulder.Lance threw a careless arm over his waist and whispered into his ear seductively, “Can I put my tongue in your mouth?”

It only made Keith laugh harder, body shaking against Lance’s.Faking shock, Lance said, “I can’t believe you’re laughing at my seduction attempt.It’s fool-proof.”

When Keith managed to stop laughing, he removed himself from Lance’s neck and said, without a thought, “God, I like you.I really like you.”Then he reached up and ran his fingers through the hair by Lance’s temple.

Lance smiled brilliantly.Then he leaned in and kissed Keith, their noses bumping together as they adjusted.

The arm thrown over his waist tightened into a proper hold, pulling Keith in so that their bodies were practically flush.Throwing caution to wind, Keith wound the arm that wasn’t trapped beneath him around Lance’s neck and broke the kiss so he could initiate another one.

It quickly became apparent that Lance knew what he was doing.His fingers were light on Keith’s jaw and he adjusted the tilt of his head, finding the best fit for their slightly parted lips.It was good they were lying down, because Keith was feeling extremely light-headed.

The truth was, Keith hadn’t expected kissing to be like this.It was wet.And the sounds really gave meaning to the term ‘sucking face’.By all rights it should’ve been the most disgusting thing Keith had every done, but it wasn’t.Not even close.Lance was warm and gentle and steady.Every once in awhile he’d pull a few inches away and wait for Keith’s eyes to flutter open and they would stare at each other and Keith would silently curse himself for not doing this sooner.

Lance was his entire world.He was all he could smell, all he could taste, and all he could feel.And it was so _nice._ It eased an almost constant ache in him to be touched.It was hardly a decision when Keith opened his mouth under Lance’s and their tongues slid together.

“Fuck,” Lance murmured between their lips.That word alone held the power to bring Keith immense satisfaction and to send a jolt of arousal through his body.

Pecking Lance’s lips one more time, he pulled away and noticed a trail of spit spreading out between them.Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, Keith said, “God, that’s disgusting.”

“That was not disgusting.”

“No, I don't mean…that was fine.”

Lance raised an eyebrow.“Fine, huh?Want me to kiss you some more?I can change that fine to an oh god yes.”

Keith rolled his eyes and rolled onto his back, freeing his arm.He did pull Lance with him, though.He was not going to be the one that made them stop touching.

Accepting the new position easily, Lance slid down Keith’s body so he could tuck his face into Keith’s neck.“So, boyfriend, how long you staying?”

“Don’t know.”Keith let the use of boyfriend go, because he liked it better than mullet-head.

“Want to watch me do homework?”

“Not really,” Keith said.

“Are you sure?I think it could be a really beneficial relationship for the both of us.”

“I’m sure you do.”

“You see, for every like ten pages of reading I do, you could kiss me like that again.I’d be motivated and you’d get to kiss me,” Lance said.

“Uh huh,” Keith said absentmindedly, sneaking his arm underneath Lance and curling it so he could run his fingers through the hair above the nape of Lance’s neck.

“Please,” Lance whined.“Homework is long and hard and I never want to.Especially now, if it means you’re going to leave.”

The idea of leaving made Keith’s chest tight, but he sure as hell wasn’t going to admit that.Then he wondered why he couldn’t admit that much when he’d just said a whole series of way more embarrassing things just so Lance would kiss him.“Fine,” Keith said.“Got anything for me to read?”

“Uh…Introduction to Mechanical Engineering?”

Sighing, Keith closed his eyes.“I’ll just lie here, then.”

There was a moment of silence and then Lance said, “You’re not really an asshole, are you?”

“If you tell anyone, I’ll have to kill you,” Keith joked.It was so easy to feel safe and comfortable here.

“How would you kill me?” Lance asked, voice soft.He was more subdued like this, lying down, limbs draped over Keith.Add that to the list of reasons why they should do this all the time.

“Poison.”

“What did that dude in _Game of Thrones_ say?The only smart dude on the whole show?The father guy?Played by that cool British actor?”

“Said it was a woman’s weapon,” Keith said, laughing silently at Lance’s description and for assuming that Keith would’ve seen the show or read the books.Incidentally, he’d done both.

“Okay, well that’s more sexist than I was hoping for.”

“Get’s the job done and it isn’t messy.”

“Please, if you went off the rails, you’d totally be the guy that stabs someone with a knife like twenty times until their blood is everywhere.”

Keith laughed shortly, unsure what to say.Lance laughed, too, and then slid his lips up and down Keith’s neck in an irritatingly light gesture, barely a brush.Then, instead of landing somewhere and kissing Keith properly, he sat up and bounded off the bed, presumably gathering his homework.Keith kept his eyes closed and listened.It was why, when warm lips pressed against his, he twitched in surprise.

“It’s so cool I can do that,” Lance said, before falling uncharacteristically silent.He must’ve started working.

Keith didn’t know how long the silence lasted, but it wasn’t long.Felt like mere minutes to him.“This doesn’t even make sense,” Lance complained.Prying open an eye, Keith watched as Lance draped himself dramatically across Keith’s legs.He propped his chin on Keith’s thigh and stared at him.“You know what we should do?”

“Nope.What?”

“Go to the grocery store and take turns pushing each other around in a cart.”

“Do your homework.”

“Come on, it would be fun.”

And because he was the worst boyfriend ever—okay, and because he had promised Shiro he’d go to the store and soon—Keith agreed.They spent way too long speeding between aisles and shouting at each other for hitting things.Long enough, that when they got home and dropped off the groceries, Lance swore loudly and profusely, insisting he needed to leave.It didn’t stop him from kissing Keith for over fifteen minutes on Keith’s couch, though, which only came to an end because Shiro interrupted them with a cleared throat and a stupidly large grin.


	10. Chapter Ten

_K: When’s your lunch?_

_P: Aren’t you supposed to be working?_

_K: Took the day off_

_P: Please tell me I’m not the only one who knows that._

_K: Who do you take me for?_

_K: I told your dad_

_P: WHO DO I TAKE YOU FOR?_

_P: Last time you took a day off work, you didn’t tell a single goddamn person._

_K: That was…different_

_P: Whatever, Kogane._

_P: In a half hour, if you must know._

_K: Cool_

_K: Anywhere you wanna eat?_

_P: Panera?_

_P: How are you going to get me there?_

_K: Surprise_

_P: OH MY GOD._

_P: You finished her, didn’t you?_

_K: Yep_

_P: I will scratch your eyes out if you kill me.Or if you drive too fast.Or if you don’t bring me a helmet._

_K: I’ve got it covered_

_P: Have you taken Lance out yet? ;) ;) ;)_

_K: Stop with those_

_P: ;) ;) ;) ;)))))))_

_K: No.You’re the guinea pig_

_P: Oh.Great.That’s wonderful.I get to die so Lance lives.Thanks, Kogane.I’m really feeling the love._

_K: You’re welcome_

_P: Okay, go away.I’m supposed to be painting some pottery._

_K: How’s that going?_

_P: I hate art._

Laughing, Keith put his phone into the pocket of his leather jacket, then worked on pulling his hair back.Carefully, he pinned the more troublesome locks of his bangs on top of his head with some bobby pins and then he threw his helmet over his head and straddled Red.Grinning down at her, Keith ran his hands reverently up and down the handles and then inserted the key into the ignition and turned it to the ‘on’ position.Checking around him, Keith made sure every piece was in place and then he held the clutch tight to the grip and pressed the start button, holding it until the engine came to life, purring sweetly.Feeling giddy, Keith laughed and slowly pulled out of the driveway, checking for cars.When the road was empty, Keith was off.

A couple weeks ago, it would’ve been the happiest Keith had been in years, but then he’d somehow managed to get Lance to make out with him all the time.Still, it was electrifying.The wind was beating against his body, he was going a little faster than he should’ve been, and he had absolute freedom.If he wanted, he could go to California or New Mexico or Nevada and no one could’ve stopped him.

Maybe he would’ve, once.In high school, almost definitely.But now he had Lance, a best friend, and a relationship with his brother that wasn’t entirely one-sided.He had some purpose, some direction.For Keith, it was a nice feeling, knowing he couldn’t just run off at a moment's notice.It meant he had someone who would miss him.Properly miss him.Not miss him just because they felt it was their obligation to do so.

It occurred to him as he rode through side streets, taking the back way to Pidge’s high school, that he had a family.One that wasn’t just Shiro and one that mattered. 

A few minutes later, he pulled into the parking lot of Pidge’s high school and took a spot in the unloading section near the front.Turning off Red, Keith flipped her kickstand, took off his helmet, and then leaned against her, crossing his arms over his chest.Did he need to stand like that?Probably not.But judging by most of the girls and a few of the boys who were sitting outside having lunch—Pidge had second lunch—it looked as cool as he thought it did.

The five minute bell rang and the lunch-goers started to file inside, some of the girls looking back at Keith.One even waved and smiled and Keith felt a small part of him die. 

When Pidge appeared ten minutes later, she found Keith easily.Rolling her eyes so dramatically that it was visible from a rather significant distance, Pidge yelled, “You look like a dumbass.”

“You’re just jealous.”

“Of your mullet?”

Keith sighed and left his bike, approaching Pidge.Her backpack was missing, probably stuffed haphazardly into her locker, and she was wearing her typical shorts and loose t-shirt.“You’re in a good mood,” she observed.

“Look at her,” Keith said, moving slightly so Pidge could get the whole effect.The red paint was glowing in the sunlight and Keith practically sighed audibly.She was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.

“Impressive,” Pidge said, voice filled with pride.“Now take me to Panera.We have to be back soon.”

“I don’t think you’re being appreciative enough.”

“You sound like Lance.”

Keith’s mouth fell open.“That’s…offensive.”

“It’s probably because you spend every second of every day with him.”

“Hey, you’re the one I’m picking up for lunch.”

“So I can die first,” Pidge said.“Nice try, Kogane.”

“It’s not so you can’t die first,” Keith mumbled, going behind Red and unzipping the bag hanging off the end.All that was in there, really, was a helmet and a book, and he grabbed the helmet, handing it over to Pidge.Scowling at her as she gazed at it apprehensively, he said, “Don’t you trust me?”

Sighing, she nodded.“Yeah.I do.”

“Alright, then.”Keith got on and then patted the seat behind him.“Hop on.”

Carefully, she swung her leg over, the tips of her toes the only things touching the ground.Starting the bike, Keith felt her arms immediately crush his middle.“This feels very tippy,” she said.

“It’s fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah.”

Her grip loosened slightly.“Fine.I’m choosing to believe you.If I die, I’m haunting you and it won’t be pleasant.”

“Thought you didn’t believe in ghosts.”

“Of course I don’t.”

“Makes your threat not very threatening.”

“Shut up and drive,” Pidge said.

Laughing, Keith slowly released the clutch, as he twisted the throttle and Pidge doubled-down on her hold the minute they began to move.Since they were still moving slow, Keith said, “You’re going to choke me.”

“Shut up,” she grumbled.

“Fine,” Keith said, coming out of the high school driveway.“Ready to really ride?”

Pidge mumbled something behind him.He didn’t hear all of it, but the part he did hear was a nasty set of swear words.

 

After they got Panera, Keith suggested he take them somewhere more scenic, but Pidge resisted, still unsure about the motorcycle.By the time they’d reached Panera, she’d started getting comfortable.It was possible it could’ve been difficult to get her back on if she didn’t have to get back to school in a timely manner.

When they drove back, Pidge insisted Keith stick to the slower back roads.He did and since the wind was less profound, they were able to talk.Pidge asked him a series of questions about how the motorcycle worked and Keith answered.That helped her considerably, Pidge’s death grip weakening.When they reached the high school, Pidge even sighed in regret.Since she liked school, Keith knew it was because she wanted longer on the bike. 

Sliding off, she handed Keith the extra helmet, and said, “So you’re taking Lance out tonight?”

“Yeah.”

“Taking him to the hill?”

Keith blushed.That was answer enough for Pidge.She cackled and slapped him hard in the arm.“Does he know that you haven’t taken anyone to the hill?That all of us are convinced the hill doesn’t actually exist?That you just took my brother’s car that one night, went to some diner, had some coffee, and then came back and talked about some mythic hill?”

“No,” Keith said.“And you aren’t going to tell him.”

“I’m not?”

“I will tackle you.”

“He already knows you like him, idiot.What damage can it do?”

“A lot,” Keith said.“More than I’m willing to deal with.”

“I’m sure the teasing he dishes out is good for you.”

“Of course you do.Go back to school, you gremlin.I’ll talk to you later.And don’t you dare text Lance.”

“Already texting him,” she sing-songed as she walked towards one of the side entrances to the school.In this case, the entrance to the cafeteria.All Keith could do was watch as her fingers clacked away on her phone screen.

 

Keith ended up at the park by the river.Grabbing his book, he took a spot underneath a large tree and stripped off his helmet, jacket, boots, and socks.He wriggled his toes in the soft grass and exhaled happily.It had been a long time since he’d had a proper day off work. 

Cracking open _Dune_ , one of his favorites, he could feel the way his afternoon was going to fall away in words, time moving in bursts.For Keith, it was one of the very few ways losing time was acceptable.

But then his phone buzzed and he knew it was Lance.Tapping his index finger against his book, Keith tried to fight the urge to drop his book and see what Lance wanted.Partially because he knew what Lance wanted—it was definitely about the hill since Pidge, the traitor, had texted him—and partially because it was terribly pathetic constantly being at Lance's beck and call.Not that Keith wasn’t, because he definitely was.It was just better to take time, to delay, so Lance didn’t know quite how firm the hold was.

Finishing the page he was on, Keith decided to read another when his phone buzzed again.

“Fine,” Keith sighed to himself, picking the phone up and laying it on his thigh.

_L: YOU HAVEN’T TAKEN ANYONE TO THE HILL???_

_L: HOW ARE THEY SUPPOSED TO WATCH THE SUNSET???_

_L: HOW HAVE YOU DENIED PEOPLE SUCH BEAUTY FOR SO LONG???_

_L: Also, I can’t believe everyone knew you liked to watch sunsets before I did.What the hell, man?_

_K: I met you like two months ago_

_L: SO?_

_K: So, yeah, Shiro and Pidge heard about the hill.Because I’ve known both of them for years and the hill was discovered like a year ago_

_L: I don’t like it_

_K: If it helps, neither of them have made out with me_

_L: I would hope not_

_L: I mean, obviously, Shiro should never do that, but someone should inform Pidge just how much she’s missing out_

_L: Maybe I’ll do that_

_K: Please, god, don’t_

_L: So are you taking me to the hill? ;)_

_L: Because Pidge just kind of started talking about it randomly, but I’m figuring it was related to a conversation of some kind_

_K: You busy?_

_L: Fuck no_

_L: I’m the least busy I’ve ever been_

_L: It's dead week.  Who the fuck cares?_

_K: Sun sets a little after eight_

_L: How we getting there?_

_K: Don’t worry about that_

_L: I’m worrying_

_L: Remember when I first hung out with you and you took me to a creepy ass garage all dressed in black?Because I do_

_K: And we didn’t end up robbing the place, did we?_

_L: Not sure that’s the point_

_K: That’s definitely the point_

_K: Trust me, okay?_

_L: Yeah, alright_

_K: Wow.I expected some argument_

_L: I never argue.Come on, Keith_

_K: Right_

_L: Reading, aren’t you?_

_K: Huh?_

_L: Well, since we've started making out on a regular basis, you’ve been more talkative_

_L: Also, you’re only this bad at responding to me when you’re reading_

_L: Nice.Ignoring me_

_L: Told you I’d learn the fuck out of you, didn’t I?_

_L: Also, I can’t believe you left before I got to flirt shamelessly with you.Every conversation needs at least two pick up lines.I’ll just add them to your list of unread texts_

_L: Ahem_

_L: I thought happiness started with an h.So why does mine start with u?_

_L: Did you get those skinny ass jeans on sale?Cuz at my house they’re 100% off_

_K: Was the ahem really necessary?_

_L: YES_

_L: DID ANY OF MY LINES WORK?_

_K: Kindly fuck off_

_L: Guess that’s a no_

 

A little after seven, Keith knocked on Lance’s door.The speed with which it was opened caught Keith by surprise and for a couple seconds, he just blinked at Lance.Lance, however, was a study in forward momentum.The only thing that could stop him was Keith’s body and that was exactly what he pummeled into, pulling Keith into a hug.By now, Keith was comfortable enough with Lance’s hugs, a frequent occurrence, that he returned it instantly.

“Hey, babe!”

“Hi,” Keith said, relaxing even further.Lance had this effect on him.

A kiss landed on his temple and Keith practically melted, knees weak.Internally shaking himself, Keith managed to contain the embarrassment to his nose nuzzling Lance’s neck.

“Have a good day?” Lance asked, voice softer.

“Yeah.I wasn’t with you, so…”

Flinging Keith’s arms away from him, Lance stepped away and pretended to look offended.“What kind of boyfriend are you?”

Rolling his eyes, Keith said, “Are we going?”

“Yep,” Lance smiled.Looking over his shoulder, he shouted, “We’re going to go watch a sunset, Hunk.Don’t wait up.”

“Keith, if you take advantage of my son, I’ll have to kill you.Consent. Condoms.Uh…”

“Thanks, Mom,” Lance interrupted, saving Hunk from having to come up with another word.“I appreciate your protection of my virtue.” 

“Anytime.”

“It’s not like I’m going to have sex with you on top of a hill,” Keith mumbled, taking Lance’s hand and tugging him away from the door.It slammed shut and then they were headed down the hall.As usual, Lance was practically bouncing beside him.

“You could, though.I sure as hell wouldn’t mind being ravaged on a hill.”

“I know you’re winking.Stop winking.”

“I’ll just keep winking until you see it.”

“I’m not going to look.”

“Oh, babe,” Lance said, “I know you can’t resist looking at me.I’m magnetic.”

“You’re only making it easier.”

Laughing, Lance brought their linked hands up to his mouth and kissed the back of Keith’s hand.Figuring Lance couldn't wink and kiss at the same time, Keith glanced over.Lance was definitely winking.Over and over again.It looked absolutely ridiculous.

“Told you you’d look.”

“Well, you cheated.”

“Did not.”

“Did too.”  
  
“Fine.Can I cheat again?” Lance asked, pulling Keith with him as his back landed against a wall.

“The sunset isn’t going to wait for us, you know.”

“It can wait a little.”

“It really can’t,” Keith said, smiling despite himself.Leaning in, he kissed Lance softly on the mouth, before breaking away and scattering kisses down Lance’s chin and up his jawline until he reached his ear.“Because,” he whispered there, “it sets at a specific time.8:05 today.Check your weather app.”

“I don’t know why this is turning me on, but it definitely is.”

“Great.”

“Yeah, in fact, can we test something?”

“No,” Keith said, moving back.“We actually have to go.”

“Ugh, fine.I’ll just have to test it later.”

“Great.  Whatever it takes to get you to move.”

“Moving,” Lance said, pushing himself off the wall, purposefully bumping into Keith on his way to the door.He shot a flirtatious grin Keith’s way as he opened it, clearly forgetting there was a step down, because he started flailing in an attempt to keep his balance.Keith burst into laughter.

“Sure,” Lance called.“I almost die and you laugh.That makes complete sense.”

 

Halfway to the garage, it occurred to Lance what was happening.Stopping, he began slapping Keith hard on the arm.“Oh my god.You finished, didn’t you?Of course you did.Why the hell did I not realize that?The first place you were going to take your bike was the goddamn hill and I’m just…”

“Do you have to talk so much?”

“Don’t interrupt me with such absurd questions.”

“8:05.”

“Alright, I’ll contain it for now,” Lance said, slinging an arm around Keith’s shoulders and pulling him in tight.“But I’m so proud of you, babe.That’s awesome.”

“It’s not…”

“Proud.Of.You.In complete seriousness.”

Blushing, Keith smiled.Then he kissed Lance on the neck, the easiest place for him to reach.“Thanks,” he mumbled.

“8:05, Keith.Tick tock.”

“How have you survived this long?”

“Already want to murder me again, huh?”

“Yeah,” Keith said.

They started walking again, a comfortable silence falling between them.It was a condition they were becoming more used to.As their time spent together increased, so did lulls in conversation and moments when they were both bored and out of topics.In the beginning, Lance had tried to talk through them, but when he’d learned that it didn’t mean Keith was going to leave, he’d started letting the silences linger.

“Hey, mullet-head,” Lance said a couple of minutes later.

“Hmm.”

“Um, well…”

“Spit it out, Lance.”

“Why don’t you go back to school now?Like community college or something.You’ve got the time, it’s been awhile since high school, whatever happened then, and since you’re done with your bike, you could probably scrape up enough money for a couple classes.I know they have classes at night, because there’s lots of people like you, with jobs, who…”

“Where did this come from?” Keith asked, keeping his eyes trained to the ground.

“I was just thinking about how you were done with your bike—which is still super cool, by the way—and I wondered if you were going to fill that time is all.And since it sounded like you kind of wanted to go to school…”Lance trailed off, looking distinctly uncomfortable.Keith hated that he was uncomfortable, even if it was probably reasonable.The topic was not one of Keith’s favorites.

Swallowing the first words he came up with, Keith spoke slower, more carefully, not wanting to dissuade Lance from asking him questions or sharing his opinion in the future.That was what he was supposed to do, right?That was the contract he’d entered into when agreeing to be Lance’s boyfriend?  To fucking try?

“I don’t know,” Keith said.“I haven’t thought about it.I don’t even know what I would study.”

“Well, what did you like in high school?” Lance asked, his voice tinged with relief.

“Absolutely nothing.”

“That bad, huh?”

“It probably wasn’t the school’s fault,” Keith sighed.

“You like reading.What about English?”

“Waste of fucking time.”

Laughing, Lance nodded.“Alright, well, fuck if I know.I guess it’s just something I think you should think about?Is that something I’m allowed to say?Probably not.I mean, it’s not like we’ve…”

“Yeah,” Keith interrupted, feeling his heart pick up.“It is.And I’ll think about it.”

“So, I really like you.”

Laughing softly, Keith said, “I know.”

“Nice.”

“Nice?”

“You Princess Leia’d me.”

“I guess I did.”

“He Princess Leia’s me and he didn’t even mean to do it,” Lance sighed, shaking his head dramatically. 

“Well, I do think Han Solo said I love you, not 'I really like you.'”

“Semantics.”

Rolling his eyes, Keith shrugged Lance’s arm off and approached the garage,unlocking it and sliding it up.Red was right there, waiting, looking just as beautiful as she’d looked this morning.Grinning, Keith set to work.He grabbed his leather jacket from the seat and slipped it on, before carelessly putting up his hair, pinning just enough hair back so that nothing would fall into his eyes when he put his helmet on.Then he grabbed Lance’s helmet and searched for him.He was, in fact, still at the entrance of the garage, mouth hanging open.

“What?” Keith asked, tossing him the helmet, half expecting Lance to drop it.

Lance caught it easily, not moving his gaze from Keith.“Your hair…you…is that a leather jacket?”

“Uh…yeah.”

“It’s, uh,” Lance’s voice cracked, “It looks good on you.Like, really good.Like, if I wasn’t already going to hell, I definitely am now.”

Keith’s mouth went dry and he had to focus on checking his bike to distract himself, because if he didn’t, they were never going to make it to the hill.Instead, it would be them on this garage floor, shirts off, mouths everywhere.The idea of sex had kind of terrified Keith up until this point, due to his complete lack of experience, but it didn’t really now.He could make up for it with impulsive enthusiasm, an impulsive enthusiasm he was really feeling right now.Lance had not looked at him quite like that before.

Straddling Red, he held his helmet in the crook of his arm and said, “You should probably move.I’m gonna ride it out.I’ll need you to close the garage door behind me and lock it.”

“Can you just…”Lance held up a hand, took out his phone, and snapped a quick picture.“Okay.Ride away, babe.”

Nodding, Keith started her up and eased her out of the garage and into the driveway.Breaking, he watched as Lance closed the garage behind him.“Do you want to lock it up?” he asked.

“Nah.We’ll be back soon.”

Lance put his hands on his hips.“It’s not your garage, dude.”

The keys were in his jeans pocket.  And Lance definitely knew that.  “You just want a chance to grope me.”

“That would be…entirely correct.But it’s so not the point.”

“Put on your helmet and get on the goddamn motorcycle, Lance.”

“Fine,” Lance sighed.“Is this going to give me helmet hair?”

“Yes.”

“You aren’t going to crash, right?What if I just…”

“Helmet on.Now.”

Moping, Lance did as Keith asked.Then he swung his leg over and nestled himself up next to Keith, immediately winding his arms around Keith’s stomach, hands unnecessarily running up Keith’s chest.

“Grope me anyway, why don’t you?”

“You’re welcome.”

Feeling particularly irritated, a little turned on, and a lot reckless—all it took was sitting on this motorcycle—Keith said, “Gonna jerk off to that picture you took?”

“What?” Lance shouted.“Oh my god, what did you just say?”

Laughing, Keith revved the engine and then took off, this time driving fast.This wasn’t Pidge.Besides, Lance had told him he could handle it all those weeks ago. 

The grip around him tightened, but Lance whooped loudly into his ear and Keith felt electric.This wasn’t why he’d built Red, but it suddenly seemed like it was.There was laughter and yelling and wind and warmth and Keith didn’t want it to end.He kept playing with the words _fuck the sunset_ in his head, but never got around to saying them.

Before long, they were out of the city, driving on country roads, going at least sixty, sometimes seventy.The sky was getting subtly darker, and Keith thought maybe they weren’t going to make it, but then they were starting to climb and he knew they would.

The roads started to curve, so Keith slowed down.When they got to the top, there was a small parking lot.Keith parked, shut off Red, waited for Lance to climb off and then did the same, barely getting his helmet off before Lance hurtled in and lifted him off his feet in a tight hug.

“That was amazing!” he said.“I’m like so hyped right now.I think I could do literally anything.I could fucking fly and even if I couldn’t, I’m sure as hell willing to give it a shot.”Then he dropped Keith and started running around the small parking lot, arms out, making airplane noises.

It was so endearing.Smiling fondly, Keith said, “Alright, weirdo, take your airplane through the trees there.”

Lance did exactly that.Keith followed at a much more relaxed pace, uncrossing his arms when he came out of the trees and onto a small grassy bank that overlooked everything.The whole world was lit in a golden glow below them, endless trees, until it hit the city they’d just left in the distance, the lights gradually coming on.Lance was standing on top of a rock and looking out, completely still for once.Walking over to him, Keith looked up and saw his eyes sparkling.His skin was glowing in the fading light and Keith felt something completely different from what he’d felt in the garage.Leaning up against Lance’s side, he said, “You’re beautiful.”

“Oh my god, would you stop saying things like that when I’m not paying full attention?”

“No.”

“Could you say it again?”

“No,” Keith said.

“What about the other thing?The question about…”

“No.”

Snorting, Lance hopped off the rock and settled on the ground.Keith joined him, resting his back on the rock Lance had just departed.Seemingly unsatisfied, Lance fidgeted for a moment, before swearing, and moving in front of Keith.Placing his hands on Keith’s knees, he stared pulling them apart, but paused when Keith said, “What are you doing?”

“Cuddling.”

“Cuddling,” Keith said flatly. 

“Yes, Keith, ever heard of it?”

Frowning, Keith spread his legs and tried to stay as still as possible as Lance got comfortable, settling his back against Keith’s chest.Hair got into his mouth and Keith said, “Get your head away from my face.”

“Oh, sorry.”Readjusting, Lance’s head fell to the side.“Next time, we should probably do it the other way around.Since I’m taller and all.”

“Who said there’ll be a next time?”

“Keith,” Lance whined.

Letting out a sigh, Keith said, “Noted.”Then he wrapped his arms around Lance and whispered, “Comfortable?”

“I think I literally live for when your voice gets all soft like that.”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

“Not one of your best distractions, mullet-head.But, yes, I’m comfortable.And since I didn’t answer your other question…”

“Can we pretend I didn’t say that?”

“Nope.”After a momentary pause, Lance said, “Honestly, yeah, I’ll probably get off to it.” 

“Ugh, Jesus.I don’t want to know,” Keith said, laughing despite himself.

“But, you know, you could always just be there for it.Instead.If you wanted.Like, no pressure.Just an idea that I had.Like eighty percent of the ride up here.”

“Thanks for the offer.”

“Sure,” Lance said brightly.

“Have you ever…”Keith trailed off, deciding he really didn’t want to know and that he was very much done with the whole topic.

“Yeah,” Lance said.“Once.With my ex.Probably why she broke up with me, honestly.I was so nervous, I kept making bad jokes and puns.It was kind of terrible.”

Keith laughed.“Sounds like you.”

“You wouldn’t mind, would you?”

“If you don’t mind getting punched in the face for really awful ones, then no, I don’t think I would.”

“Deal.”

In a quiet voice, Keith said, “If she really cared about you, she wouldn’t have minded either, you know.”

“Nah, man, you weren’t there.I don’t blame her.”

Knowing that if he didn’t say the right thing this could quickly devolve into a pointless and petty fight, Keith consciously picked his words.Again.For the second time that night.Thankfully, it was a lot easier to do when his mind wasn’t overtaken by emotion.“Even if it was the most horrible, awkward mess imaginable, I wouldn’t break up with you over it.That’s just…you deserve better than that.”

“I mean…”

“You do, Lance,” Keith said.“You’re a fucking person, for god’s sake.”

“Yeah.”

Huffing, Keith brought one of his hands up to run through his hair, keeping the other firmly wrapped around Lance.“You’re a good person.Bright, funny, intelligent, and sure, you talk _a lot_ , but you’re still…you’re usually the best part of my day.And that’s what should’ve mattered to her.”

For once, Lance was completely silent and Keith wondered if he felt this insecure when he admitted something and Keith didn’t respond.It was awful.Then Lance pushed away and Keith panicked, hoping he hadn’t said anything wrong.

Thankfully, he turned around and took Keith’s head in his hands.His eyes were wet, as if he’d just cried or was about to cry.Then he kissed him, hard.Without thought, Keith opened his mouth to Lance, their tongues sliding together.Sitting up fully, Keith wound his arms around Lance’s neck and arched into him.A hand slid down his back, lighting up the nerves along his spine, and Keith gasped into Lance’s mouth.“Hey,” he breathed, later.“I’m missing the fucking sunset, asshole.”

Laughing, Lance pecked Keith on the mouth twice and then relaxed back into him.Together, they watched the sun set, a flood of pinks and oranges, until it was gone.When it was, Lance said, “Thank you.For…saying that.”

“Sure.”

“Would it kill you to say nice things like that sometimes?”

Knowing Lance needed that to come off as a joke, Keith said, “Yes.It would.”

“You’re kind of the best part of my days, too.” 

“Thanks.”

“Wow, could you make that sound more awkward?”

“You cried.”

“Did not!” Lance shrieked.

“Totally did.”

“Almost cried, Kogane.There’s a difference.”

“I’m not sure I believe you.”

Growling, Lance tackled Keith to the ground and then straddled his lap.Pinning Keith’s wrists to the ground, Lance said, “Have I mentioned I really like you?”

“Only a couple times.”

“I really like you.”

“Shut up and kiss me.”  
  
"Sure we can't..."

"We are not having sex on a fucking hill in public!" Keith yelled, smiling as he listened to Lance's laughter echoing around them.


	11. Chapter Eleven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just realized I forgot these last time and I hate when I do that, because all of you deserve a thank you like every fucking day for the support you give me.  
> I wanted to also say thank you for the fic recs on tumblr...I saw a couple. It'd be great if you tagged me...don't have to...but if you want @itsthegameilike is the place to do it. Just thought I'd give a casual reminder. Because I do super want to thank you  
> Mmm...I actually threw in some angst? Kind of?   
> Anyway, thank you to Camille, as well, the only sun I really need  
> Enjoy! <3

“Door for you, Keith.”

“Just let him in, Shiro,” Keith called, resuming the book he was reading.It wasn’t very good which was why he was trying to finish it as quickly as possible.Pidge would tell him to give up on it and find something new, but Keith was stubborn.If he started something, he sure as hell was going to finish it.

“He says if I let him in he won’t be able to leave and he needs to be able to leave.”

“Tell him that’s nice.”

There was the gentle murmurings of a conversation and then Shiro yelled, “Just get your ass out here, Keith.”

Sighing, Keith set down his book and wandered into the living room, seeing Lance at the door and Shiro looking distinctly disgruntled as he chopped up an onion.Catching Shiro’s eye, Keith said, “Is he being insufferable?”

“You both are.”

“What’s up?” Keith asked Lance, leaning up against the doorjamb and crossing his arms over his chest.

“I’m in the middle of the longest reading known to man and I needed a break, but it also can’t be a long break, so I figured we could hang in the hall for like five minutes and then part ways until the next time I need a break.”

“I’m not hanging in the hallway.”

“But, babe,” Lance whined, “I have a final tomorrow and if I don’t study, I’ll fail.And if I come into your apartment, I’ll never leave because you’re unfairly attractive and good at kissing and infinitely better than some dry old white guy’s writings about the ethics of science.”

The pouty lip had been working a lot better on Keith in the recent weeks and Lance was using it to full effect right now.Stepping forward, Keith circled his arms around Lance’s neck and whispered, “How about the doorway?”

Groaning, Lance laid his forehead against Keith’s and said, “Stop being so goddamn irresistible.”

“Mullet included?”

Lance scrunched up his nose and then said, “Mullet included.”

“How am I supposed to do that?”

“I don’t know.Do something gross.Start a fight.No, actually, don’t do that.That would only make it worse.Just…”Lance stopped suddenly, eyes brightening.“You know what we could do?”

“I could spit in your face since you just spit in mine.”

“Dude, that is far from important right now.There’s getting spit in the face and then there’s the misery I’m currently going through.Anyway, you should come over.That’s what should happen.”

“That doesn’t solve your problem.At all, actually.”

“Well, it solves one of them,” Lance said, raising his eyebrows and smirking.When Keith didn’t respond, debating what he was supposed to say versus what he wanted to say, Lance moaned piteously.“Please.Please, god.I need you.”

“Fine,” Keith said.“But I’m bringing my book.”

“But you hate being interrupted when you’re reading.”

“Yes, I do.”

“Clever, Kogane,” Lance said.

“You were the one who said something about failing.”

“I love it when you care.”

Rolling his eyes, Keith pecked Lance on the mouth because he could, and then untangled himself, finding his book, and telling Shiro he was going to be next door if he was needed.They walked back to Lance’s place together and when Lance opened the door, Keith was met with chaos.

Books and papers were everywhere.Hunk was lying face down on the carpet underneath their coffee table, mumbling something to himself.The kitchen had stacks and stacks of dishes, an unpleasant smell wafting from them.The image only got worse when Lance fell into the couch, a few papers crinkling underneath him.He paid no attention to it, only picking up a textbook and saying, “Keith’s here.”

“Hi, Keith,” Hunk said into the floor.

“Hi,” Keith replied slowly, unable to believe, even with the evidence right in front of him, that finals were this bad.Maybe he should reconsider his tentative decision to go back to school.

“Lance, kill me,” Hunk said.

“Not until you kill me first.”

“But if you’re dead you can’t kill me.”

“Listen, Hunk, I love you, man, but my final is tomorrow.I deserve death more than you do.You’ve got until Wednesday.Have Shay kill you.Or Keith.I’m not sure he’s sympathetic but he’s totally willing to commit murder, I promise.”

“I’m not murdering anyone,” Keith said, realizing that the two of them were barely keeping it together.Setting his book down on the counter, Keith went to the sink and began to wash the dishes that were piled up, sticking what he could in the dishwasher and hand washing the rest.It occurred to him as he worked that he might be here most of the night, but those were his friends over there, and this felt like the least he could do.

Halfway through a pan that was covered in something crusty and unidentifiable, arms wound around his waist and a warm body pressed up against him.Leaning back into it, Keith paused in his scrubbing, closing his eyes.Lips brushed his neck and then Lance whispered, “Take me away on that bike, mullet-head, and never bring me back.”

“Where do you want to go?”

“Anywhere.I don’t give a fuck.You’ll be there.”

Stomach fluttering, Keith said, “You sound a little hysterical, McClain.”

“I can’t do this.I can’t do any of this.Why the hell did I want to be an engineer?Why?I’m not smart enough or dedicated enough or probably even interested enough.I’m just sitting and staring at those pages and retaining none of it.I’m gonna fail and once that happens, I’ll fail the class and then college and then I’ll have to go home and beg my uncle for a job, which will be so embarrassing, especially since my family doesn’t even really have the money to send me to this school and…”

“Hey, woah,” Keith said, drying his hands on his jeans and turning in Lance’s arms.“You can do it.I mean, you got me to date you, didn’t you?You’re the most stubborn bastard I’ve ever met.”

“You were worth it, though.”

“And this isn’t?”

Lance grimaced and pressed his forehead into Keith’s shoulder.“No, it is.I just don’t know what I’m doing.”

“What do you need?”

“Huh?”

“Need, Lance.I’ll do anything.”

“Really?If I asked you to get me off, you would?”

“You’re so exhausting,” Keith sighed, sliding a hand around the nape of Lance’s neck to keep his head lowered, so he didn’t see the furious blush on Keith’s face.“But if it would help, then sure.I guess.”

“Okay, so you were supposed to get all horrified and say no, because now that’s all I can think about.”

“Make a goddamn decision.”

“Don’t get snippy.I can’t handle snippy right now.I need soft and sappy.And don’t pretend you’re not capable, because I totally know better now,” Lance mumbled, not struggling against Keith’s hold.It probably helped that Keith was rubbing circles into his skin with two fingers.

Deciding to remain silent because he couldn’t come up with a response that wasn’t irritated or confrontational, Keith waited.Unsurprisingly, Lance quickly got bored with the silence, not at ease enough to be comfortable with it, and he said, “Could you read my textbook aloud to me?”

“Yeah.”Then, smirking, Keith said, “Want me to do it in a whisper?”

“Do you know what my heart does when you flirt with me?” Lance asked, raising his head, Keith allowing him to. 

“What does it do?”

“Well, nothing, actually.It forgets it’s supposed to beat, so it just sits there.”

Smiling, Keith wondered if he was in love.He wondered if this was what it felt like, because he didn’t really know, but whatever he was feeling was infectious, overwhelming, and indefinable.Lance was everywhere, everything, and it was at once too much and not enough.Though Lance had been the one to show up at the door asking for his company, there was no point pretending Keith hadn’t been five minutes away from doing the same thing.

“Careful, Kogane.If you’re not, that expression’ll stick on your face and then you won’t be able to look grumpy again.”

“The horror,” Keith drawled, taking Lance’s hand and dragging him to his bedroom, not really thinking about how that could be perceived.The look on Lance’s face was absolutely priceless and it made Keith’s skin feel hot.In a rush, he said, “I just thought we wouldn’t want to disturb Hunk.He’s studying, too.”

“He’s kind of lying on the floor, actually.I’m not sure he’s done anything else in an hour.”

“He might want to study later.”

“Okay, good point.” 

Briefly retreating from the room to fetch the textbook he’d seen Lance reading, Keith returned, shutting the door behind him.Joining Lance on the bed, he took a few deep breaths, cleared his throat—earning a private, intimate laugh from Lance—and then started to read.

It was dreadfully dull, but Keith could tell Lance was drinking in each and every word, so he didn’t stop, not even when his throat started to ache from the effort.Once Lance noticed his voice was getting scratchier and quieter, he demanded Keith hand the book over.Blissfully, Lance didn’t read it aloud as Keith assumed he would, just read silently, resting the book on his lap. 

He left Lance’s bedroom and found Hunk still on the floor.Nudging a toe into Hunk’s shoulder, Keith said, “You alright, man?”

“Yeah.This is just easier than studying.I’ve been at it all day, already.I’m done.”

“Then maybe you should do something else.”

“Can’t move,” Hunk said.“Too much work.”

“Want me to bring you the carton of ice cream?Lance and I didn’t quite finish it last night.”

“Thanks, man.”

“Sure,” Keith said, heading into the kitchen, grabbing the ice cream from the freezer and a spoon from the drawer by the sink, and then placed them on the floor in front of Hunk.Leaving him to it, Keith resumed cleaning the dishes, thinking of Lance because he couldn’t seem to do anything else, even when he was just in the other room, entirely reachable.

It should’ve disturbed Keith, the very notion that he finally understood why Shiro and Allura were the way they were, but the truth was, he was happy. 

Happier than he ever remembered being.

When the dishes were done, he considered picking up around the apartment, but decided against it, not knowing where most of the objects went and fully aware that when he came back tomorrow, the mess would be back.So, he picked up his book and settled on the couch to read.

It was an hour or so later when Lance burst out of his room, throwing his textbook onto the floor—more harshly than he perhaps should’ve—and declared, “I’ve learned all I’m going to learn.Who wants to get drunk?”

“You should probably actually take the final first,” Hunk said, still on the floor, an empty carton of ice cream beside him.

“No, you can’t be the buzzkill because Keith is going to be the buzzkill and I need someone to support me.”

“Dude, you do not want to take a test hungover.Trust me.”

“That’s true,” Keith said.

“Got personal experience, Kogane?” Lance asked, raising his eyebrows.He’d made it sound teasing, but Keith knew he was genuinely curious.All Lance was knew was that high school had been terrible for Keith.He didn’t know the details, but he’d shown interest in them more than once.

“Yeah.”

“Shit, dude, in high school?” Hunk said.“I mean…uh…you don’t have to answer that.”

“Ugh, fine,” Lance sighed, walking to the couch and slumping into Keith.“I’ll just irritate my boyfriend instead.”

“Can’t we have a night off?” Hunk asked.

“No.”

“Seems like we could,” Keith said.

“You’re only saying that because you like to pretend you don’t like it when I irritate you.”

“I’m not pretending.”

“You totally are.I can tell.I see right through you, Kogane.Took me awhile, but we’re at that point now.We’ve reached it.”

“Oh yeah?What am I thinking right now?”

“That I’m gorgeous and endearing.”

Smiling, Keith said, “Sounds like you’re projecting.”

“But I’m right.I know I am, because I’m thinking the exact same thing about you.”

“You do know different people have different thought processes, right?” Keith asked, completely disregarding his point by running his fingers through Lance’s hair.It was silkier than hair had any right to be.

“I mean, yeah, but I’m right about this.Come on, give this to me.I’ve worked hard today.”

“You’re gorgeous and endearing,” Keith mumbled.Catching a tiny sigh from Hunk, he took Lance’s hand.“Come back to my place.”

“I’ll go wherever you go, sweetheart,” Lance said, winking.It didn’t sound like flirtation, though, and Keith’s body took notice, stomach twisting hard.Lance was the one to stand up first, laughing at Keith’s seeming paralyzation.“Need me to carry you?”he asked.

“As if you could.”  
  
“Are you laying down a challenge?”

“Always.”

Lance laughed and leaned down, slipping an arm underneath Keith’s knees and another behind his back.Then he lifted and they almost toppled over, but Lance managed to hang on.Grinning at Keith, he said, “Proved you wrong.”

“You haven’t actually moved yet.”

“Hunk, can you get the door?”

“Gladly,” Hunk said, hurrying to the door and flinging it open.

It wasn’t something Lance did with ease, but they made it out the door and to Keith’s, Keith unwinding one of his arms from Lance’s neck and twisting the knob.Shiro was on the couch, looking as defeated as Lance and Hunk had a couple hours ago.He smiled, though, when he noticed Keith and Lance.“Hey, guys.How’s studying going, Lance?”

“I’m done for the night.My brain hurts too much to do more.”

“I know the feeling,” Shiro yawned.“Do you guys want the place to yourselves?”

“Is that permission to bang your brother?”

“Oh my god,” Keith said.“Let the fuck go of me.”

“Nope.I’m carrying you over the threshold of your bedroom, because I’m willing to recognize this might be the last time you let me carry you bridal style.”

“I can’t believe you just asked my brother if you could have sex with me.”

“Yes, you can.”

“Why don’t you have a goddamn filter?It’s not that hard, I promise.When you think of something to say, you pause and make sure it’s something anyone wants to hear.If it’s not, you don’t say it,” Keith said.

“Big talker.”

“I have a filter!”

“Sure you do.”

Shiro laughed, interrupting them.“I’m just going to go.Allura should be home by now.”

“Say hi to her for me,” Lance said.“Add some flirtation in, too.From me, mind you.I don’t want you taking the credit for yourself.”

“I wouldn’t do that,” Shiro said seriously, eyes sparkling.Collecting his things, he tossed them into his messenger bag.Within a minute, he was ready to go, spinning the keys that unlocked his bike around his fingers.“Have fun you two.”

“Oh, we will.”

“Don’t say it like that,” Keith said.

“Like what?” Lance said innocently. 

They could hear Shiro laughing from beyond the door he’d just shut.

“Put me down.”

“Hold your horses,” Lance said, hurrying to Keith’s bedroom, and dropping him unceremoniously as soon as he crossed the threshold.Landing hard, Keith shoved him in the shoulder and then laid down on his bed. 

Staring up at Lance, he said, “What do you want to do?”

“Don’t know,” Lance replied, lying down next to him, immediately crossing into Keith’s personal space, throwing a leg over one of Keith’s and an arm over his waist.“This right here is good.”

“Yeah, it is.”

“What would it take to get you to stay soft like that?”

“Don’t know,” Keith said.“Probably nothing could.”

“I’ve got an idea.”

“Of course you do.”

“An orgasm.”

Unable to help himself, Keith burst into laughter.“That is the worst come-on I’ve ever heard.”

“It’s probably the only one you’ve ever heard.”

“Doesn’t change the fact that it’s absolutely terrible.”

“But did it work?” Lance asked.

The nerves settled in.They had an apartment entirely to themselves, Keith would be lying if he said he hadn’t spent hours during late nights thinking of it, and Lance was here, offering.“I don’t know,” he murmured.

Instead of responding, Lance pressed his face into Keith’s neck and started nibbling and kissing the skin there. Tilting his head up, Keith closed his eyes and felt the drag of Lance’s lips across his skin, the slight stubble on Lance’s cheeks tickling Keith’s jawline.His lips were so warm and gentle.In a lot of ways, it was akin to taking a bath, which was probably not want Lance was aiming for, but it was nice, nonetheless.

The jolt of arousal came when Lance slid a hand up under his shirt, resting it on Keith’s stomach and rubbing circles with his thumb.Keeping the motion going, Lance removed himself from Keith’s neck and hung over him, smiling.“I’ll just do all the work, then, shall I?”

“Sounds good to me.”

“You know, I pegged you as one of those super passionate lovers who like…”

“Please tell me you did not just say lover in a sentence.”

“That’s what you are to me, Kogane.Hate to break it to you,” Lance said, kissing Keith softly, before sitting up and taking off his shirt.“Okay,” he continued, voice determined.“Your turn.”

Sighing, Keith reached behind himself, grasped the back of his shirt, and lifted it over his head.Tossing it on the floor, he said, “You know, I didn’t actually agree to do anything.”

“Do you want to stop?”

“No,” Keith whispered, looking down at his lap.

“Do you want to talk about it first?We can totally talk, I just kind of figured you wouldn’t want to.I was just going to go for it and laugh at you when it got painfully awkward.”

“Great.”

“You’re running away from me, dude,” Lance said.

“Huh?”

“You’re like five seconds away from locking up the doors, swallowing the key, and telling me to fuck off.I kind of don’t want to get to that point, so tell me what I can do to make you more comfortable.If that’s stopping, we can totally stop.Cuddling is awesome.Cuddling is definitely in my top five favorite things to do.”

“Am not,” Keith grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Yes, you are.”

When Keith didn’t reply, completely unsure how to vocalize all of the things he was feeling, Lance said, “Lay down.”

“Why?”

“Are you going to fight me every inch of the way?”

“That’s what I do.”

“Excellent,” Lance grinned.“That’ll make this fun.Slowest sex I’ve ever had.”

“You’ve had sex once.”

“Oh, sure, throw that into my face, why don’t you?Either way, it’s one more time than you, which makes me the experienced one in this relationship.”Sitting straight, Lance puffed out his chest, and Keith laughed, rolling his eyes, and laid back on the bed.

“Alright, sex guru, show me how it’s done.”

“Will do.Although…”

“What?” Keith sighed, turning his gaze to the ceiling.It was easier to look at than Lance, who was too bright.Keith wished he had the courage, the skills, to say what he needed to say.That he wanted Lance to be just as awkward and unsure, for Lance to make all those stupid puns and jokes he’d made with his ex, for Lance to talk every goddamn step of the way, for Lance to talk out exactly what he was going to do to excruciating detail, not because Keith wanted to hear it, but because he needed to. 

“We gotta decide how far we’re going.And you’ve got to tell me what you’re thinking right now, because it looks important.”

“What?”

“Your eyebrows are doing the crinkly thing.”

“And that means?” Keith asked.

“You’re thinking hard about something.”

“How the fuck do you know that?”

“I watch you all the time.Duh.Stop underestimating my obsession with you.God,” Lance said.Then he laid down beside Keith and cupped his cheek, gently drawing Keith’s gaze towards him.“Hey,” he murmured, “talk to me.”

Burying his face into Lance’s chest, Keith said, “Hand jobs.Hand jobs are good.”

“Cool.I like those.”

“Aren’t you nervous?”

Lance laughed, the sound shaky.“Uh, yeah, man.Honestly, I’m barely keeping it together.I kind of figured you’d have already taken over by this point, too worked up and anxious to think straight.”

“Kiss me.”

“What?” Lance asked, obviously taken aback by the quick conversation change.

“You heard me.”

“Okay, but, we’re talking and it’s kind of…”

“If you want me to do something stupid, you’re going to have to kiss me.”

“I would like to point out that giving me a hand job is the furthest thing from stupid.It is, in fact, one of the greatest ideas you’ve…”

“Why do I have to do everything?” Keith mumbled, moving to straddle Lance’s lap.Not giving a Lance a chance to continue talking, something he would almost certainly do, Keith held his head in place and kissed him hard.A soft, shocked sound came from Lance, but it quickly transformed into a pleased sigh, and Lance was kissing back, hands resting on Keith’s hips, fingers digging in.They’d done this before, a number of times, but Keith still wasn’t used to sensation of his skin sliding against Lance’s.It was electric.

Slowly, Lance’s hand blazed a trail up Keith’s side to his neck, fingers lazily stroking his jaw.It was so gentle that Keith lost his urgency, instead easing their kisses into mere suggestions, tongues teasing, lips merely brushing.Every once in awhile, he would weave in something deep and heady.

After one such kiss, Lance lifted his head, panting, and Keith moved to his neck, licking and sucking. 

And Lance started laughing.

Sitting up, Keith glared at him.“What?”

“Nothing,” Lance said.“Your hair was just tickling me.By all means, continue what you were doing.It was great.”

Grimacing, Keith slid off of Lance.It wasn’t that he didn’t want to continue—he very much did—but he wasn’t sure how he was supposed to be acting or what he was supposed to be doing.“I hate this,” he mumbled.

“Was it because I laughed?I’m sorry.Just remember that my ex had to deal with puns.It’ll help, I promise.”

“No.That’s not…I’m really fucking turned on, Lance.That’s not a problem.”

“Yeah, I know.I could feel it, you know.”

Keith groaned.“That’s the problem.”

“That you’re doing it with me?”

“No.How could you even…no.”

“Okay, I’m trying to be understanding here, but I also have no idea what you’re trying to tell me.So, maybe, use words that actually explain something?”Keith frowned at him.“Or just glare.That’s fine, too.Why don’t we stop?”

“We are not stopping.”

“God, you’re so stubborn.”

“Big talker.”

Lance huffed, straddling Keith and pinning his hands above his head.Leaning in close, stealing Keith’s breath, Lance said, “You do see the problem, right?You’re gonna have to use your words, talk about your feelings.What was that…friendship level five?Am I there?”

“Of course you are.”

“Am I?”

Through gritted teeth, Keith said, “I feel really fucking vulnerable.That’s what I hate.”

“You are not alone, my dude.”

“‘My dude?’”

“Trying to ease the tension.”

Keith snorted.“You’re such a dork.”

Kissing Keith on the forehead, Lance whispered, “Just be yourself.I promise you, I’ll like whatever I see.”

Biting his lip, Keith traced the bridge of Lance’s nose with a finger and stared into the deep blue of his eyes, finding exactly what he needed there.Affection, albeit exasperated, and fear.He was feeling the same and that was enough. 

As his finger tugged Lance’s bottom lip down, Keith said, “You, too.”

Lance smiled.“Famous last words, Kogane.”After a long, dramatic pause, he said, “So…is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”

Laughing, Keith shook his head, and then pulled Lance down so they could kiss and kiss and kiss, until they forgot everything but each other, which was easier than Keith had imagined it would be once Lance started rocking his hips leisurely and without rhythm, pressing their erections together.They were both gasping into the kisses, Keith clutching Lance’s hips and encouraging an increase in pace.It felt so goddamn good and Keith couldn’t remember what had been going on in his brain before this.

At least, until it occurred to him that he was closer than comfortable to coming in his pants like some thirteen year old boy.Shoving at Lance, Keith managed to dislodge him.

“Hey, I was enjoying that!” Lance complained, falling back on his hands and spreading his legs out, trying to take up as much space as possible.

“Take your pants off.”

“Take yours off.”

“Fine,” Keith said, unbuttoning them.When he was about to tug down the zipper, hands landed over his and Keith jerked his head up to see Lance gazing at him questioningly.

“I want to do that.”

“You could’ve said.”

“I didn’t think you were actually going to start taking your pants off.”

“What was I going to do?” Keith asked, staring at Lance’s hands as they worked on the zipper.They were shaking slightly and Keith felt the fluttering in his stomach still, overcome by unadulterated adoration.It wasn’t some passing, fleeting feeling that came with Lance’s smile, either.It was real.Ingrained. 

Which became immediately obvious.Because when Lance said, “A boxers man, I see,” followed by, “Oh my god, you have planets on your boxers.Do they have faces?They have faces!These might be the most adorable things I’ve ever seen,” the adoration didn’t disappear.It grew. 

“I like space,” Keith grumbled, trying not to grin.

“I like that you like space,” Lance said, kissing Keith, before falling back and tugging on the ends of Keith’s jeans, struggling to wrestle them off.“Did you have to wear fucking skinny jeans?”

“Yep.”

“They’re an absolute bitch to get off.”

“It’d probably go faster if I did it.”

“I’m doing it!” Lance declared, finally slipping the last of the denim off Keith’s feet.Lifting one of Keith’s legs to his mouth, Lance kissed the bridge of his foot and all the way up his calf, biting the skin over the kneecap with care.

Keith felt like he was falling apart into pieces.No one had shown him attention quite like this before and it was overwhelming.

“So, Kogane,” Lance said, spreading Keith’s legs and nestling in between them.“How fast are you going to come?”

“How about you shut up and get rid of your pants?”

“So, super fast, then.”

“Fuck you.”

Laughing, Lance stood up on the bed and shucked both his pants and boxers, putting his hands on his hips and striking a pose, a lot like the one typically used for explorers in history books.

Keith had a hard time looking anywhere but at his cock, half-hard, but he did manage to say, “I’m embarrassed I know you.”

“You more than know me.You’re about to touch this,” Lance said, gesturing to his cock and grinning.

Bursting into laughter, Keith fell back into the pillows and held his hand over his mouth.“I’m glad I’m doing this with you,” he said, eventually, Lance having crashed down beside him by then.

“Really?”

“Yeah,” Keith replied, hooking his thumbs in his boxers and removing them, keeping his eyes fixed on Lance’s, blushing softly when they traveled down his body.

“You’re gorgeous,” Lance said, voice warm, trailing a hand down Keith’s side.

Unable to stand it any longer, Keith rushed forward and kissed Lance, grounding himself in the familiar feel of his lips.Against his lips, Lance mumbled, “You know, it wouldn’t hurt to tell me I’m gorgeous, too.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

“Agreeing sarcastically is not the same thing.Not even close.”

“Would you shut up?” Keith asked, breaking their fumbling kiss and glaring at him.

“Make me,” Lance grinned.

Reaching down, Keith gripped Lance’s cock in his hand and stroked it lazily, trying to replicate what he did to himself, not knowing what exactly Lance preferred.

It did have it’s desired effect.Lance let out a strangled sound of surprise and arousal and then he hid his face in Keith’s neck, lathering it with open-mouthed kisses.Until, that is, he breathed, “Grip harder,” and then he gave up on kissing, panting instead, the waves of breath leaving Keith’s skin damp.

“Gonna return the favor?” Keith asked, feeling the arm that was bent awkwardly beneath him start to lose some feeling.

“Tell me I’m gorgeous.”

Rolling his eyes, Keith said, “You’re gorgeous, Lance.”

“With feeling.”

“Fuck, I’m going to kill you.”

“Turned on?”

“Painfully so, yeah.”

“Three little…oh fuck.Do that again,” Lance breathed.

Breathless himself, amazed that he’d managed to make someone utter the word ‘fuck’ with such abandon.Voice low, almost husky—Keith hadn’t even known his voice could do that—he said, “If you don’t fucking jerk me off in the next five seconds, I will stop.”To punctuate his demand, he twisted his hand as he reached the head of Lance’s cock, the move that had earned him the curse.It earned him another and then Lance took him in hand.

A shuddering breath was ripped from Keith.Resting his forehead on Lance’s shoulder, he said, “A little slower.”

Lance obliged and Keith couldn’t believe how much better this was with another person.The differences in Lance’s hand, the stimuli from Lance’s breath and scattered kisses, the silent and inevitable competition to see who could make who come first, all left Keith completely out of his mind.The world was hazy with pleasure, all Lance and his hand, and when his orgasm rolled over him, it didn’t come as a surprise.He couldn’t even find it in himself to be embarrassed at how fast he’d come.It had been too good for that.

“Could’ve warned me,” Lance said.

“Sorry,” Keith mumbled, still not back to himself.

“It’s fine, I just…”

“Just?”

“Just…oh, god, I’m close.Could you…”

“Faster?”

“Yeah.”

Nodding, Keith dug deep, ignoring his body’s desire to fall back into the bed and never move again, and jerked his hand up and down, listening to the hitches in Lance’s breath with a modicum of pride and delight.

Then Lance’s body tensed and come spilled onto Keith’s hand.Slowing the pace, guiding Lance through his orgasm, Keith only pulled away when Lance slumped into the bed.

“Cuddle with me.”

Blinking for a moment, Keith finally said, “I have come all over my hand and stomach.”

“I don’t care if you don’t care.”

“That’s so gross.”

Lance shrugged, eyes still closed.“It’s all gross if you think about it too hard.”

Unable to argue with that and really not wanting to stand, Keith curled into Lance and sighed, feeling sleepy.Tracing shapes on Lance’s chest, feeling as though he hadn’t paid nearly enough attention to it—he really was beautiful—Keith said, “What were you going to say before you…”

“That I wanted to see you come,” Lance said.“I suppose I’ll just have to see it next time.”

There was an obvious question behind those words and Keith nodded.“Next time.”

“I should head back.”

“Stay.” 

“Final tomorrow morning, babe.”

“I’m in a soft mood,” Keith said, searching for anything to make Lance stay just a little longer. 

“No, you can’t say that.I’ll never leave.”

“Perfect.”

“Don’t you care about my grades?”

“Sometimes.I’m having a hard time caring about them, right now,” Keith said.

“Fine.Five more minutes.I…I want to talk to you about something, anyway.”

Lance’s tone and the fact that he didn’t immediately jump into the topic made Keith wary.Humming in reply, he tried not to worry.

“I’m going home in a week.”

“Right.”

“Is that…that’s all you’re thinking right now?”

“You’re going home,” Keith repeated.

“Yeah.”

“Okay.”

“Keith…”

Keith didn’t reply.He wasn’t sure what to say.Part of him was still in the glow of the aftermath of what they’d just done and the rest of him was in a state of panic.It was finals week.This was something he should’ve seen coming, because of course Lance was still going home, but it hadn’t been.He didn’t want this to end.He didn’t want Lance to be miles and miles away from him, enough distance and space to realize how fucking crazy he was for dating Keith.He didn’t want to live through the days of calls becoming less and less frequent until they never came.

He was being abandoned.And he couldn’t be abandoned.

“Where do you even live?” Keith asked.

“Uh…New Mexico.Are you okay?”

“Yeah.Fine.”Sitting up, he reached for his shirt and boxers hanging off the end of his bed and pulled them on.Then he went into his bathroom and splashed his face with water a couple of times.

Lance followed him, still naked.Leaning against the doorjamb, he said, “I know it sucks.A lot.I don’t really even want to think about how much it’s going to suck and…God, Keith, I want to stay.I want to stay so badly, but I also can’t stand the idea of spending a summer without my family.I want…”

“Could you put some clothes on?” Keith murmured.

“Yeah.I’ll go do that.”

Staring at himself in the mirror, cheeks still lightly flushed, Keith put his hair up into a ponytail and then tried to come up with a solution, but he couldn’t think straight.At this rate, he was going to wreck every goddamn thing they’d built.Although, it was probably going to get wrecked, anyway, so how much damage could he really do?

Lance appeared in the doorway again, fully dressed this time.His expression was pained.“I know you’re not fine.I’m not fine, either.Could you please talk to me?”

“About what?You’re going home.What am I going to do about it?”

“Well, nothing, but…goddammit, Keith, at least look at me.”

Flicking his eyes up in the mirror, Keith caught Lance’s eyes.They gazed at each other for a long time and then Lance said,“I’m going to go.I don’t know if I want to hear anything you’re going to say right now.I guess all I wanted to say, anyway, is that you matter to me.A lot.And I’m not going anywhere.”

“You are, though,” Keith whispered.

Lance opened his mouth and then closed it.For a second, he looked as though he was going to move forward to do something, maybe kiss Keith goodbye, but then he thought better of it, simply leaving.Keith was still looking at his reflection when he heard the front door slam shut.


	12. Chapter Twelve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo I think this is the last chapter in the sense that the main story is over. There is going to be an epilogue, but that'll be it. I probably should've given more warning, but I never know what I'm doing so I didn't really see this coming.  
> As always, I want to thank you all for the love and support. This has been a great welcome to the Voltron fandom.   
> And thank you to Camille. I'll text you about this in the morning if I remember. Either way, I miss you. What is a girl supposed to do without the sun?  
> Enjoy! <3
> 
> Oh p.s. I got a twitter today for god knows what reason and I'm gonna talk about books I'm reading/have read, probably my life, and definitely my original writing, so if that's something you're interested in, you can find me @soooimwriting

It was midnight and Shiro hadn’t come home yet.Keith hadn’t expected him to, but he could still hear the sound Lance slamming the front door shut in the back of his head and it left him feeling lonely.Desperately lonely.It wasn’t unfamiliar, but it had been less familiar in the past months.

He was unsure how long he spent in front of the mirror, staring, and willing himself not to break down.Too long.When he finally managed to tear himself away and return to his bedroom, he was instantly reminded of Lance, of what they’d done.  It seemed as if it were only moments ago.  The room still smelled faintly of sex and Keith couldn’t quite believe what had happened, that he’d let Lance leave without a word.

But he hadn’t known what to say.It hurt.It hurt so badly that in a week Lance was going to be hundreds of miles away with his family and old high school friends, memories of Keith drifting further and further away day by day.

Retreating to the living room, Keith laid down on the couch and realized he needed someone.Not once in his life had he asked for someone when he needed them, not wanting to be an inconvenience—he’d inconvenienced his adoptive parents enough—but he felt shaky and vulnerable and he already missed Lance so much.He was next door, probably only a few feet away, and with the right words, Keith knew they could go back to what they’d been doing.But Keith didn’t have the right words in him.All he had was sharp edges and barbed emotions and he was smart enough to know Lance was right; neither of them wanted to hear the words he would say right now.

Picking up his phone, he called Shiro, praying he and Allura weren’t busy or sleeping.Though he was afraid to ask, he needed his brother.

“Keith?” Shiro asked, picking up on the first ring.“Are you alright?”

Keith’s throat closed.No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t force words out.All he managed was heavy breathing. 

“I’m coming home,” Shiro said immediately.“Do you want me to stay on the phone?”

He desperately wanted to say no, to deny anything of the sort, but if he spoke, he thought he might start crying. 

“I’m going to stay on the phone until you tell me not to.”In the background, Keith could hear Allura’s worried voice asking questions.In a low murmur, Shiro responded and then there was a door closing.“Can you tell me what’s going on?Please, say something, Keith.I need to know you’re not bleeding out on the kitchen floor or something.”

“I’m not bleeding out.”

“Okay.Good.”When Keith didn’t respond, Shiro said, “Thanks for calling me.I don’t think you’ve done that before.”

“Probably not.”

“Is it Lance?”

All his effort to hold back tears fell apart at the kindness and concern in Shiro’s voice, coupled with the sound of Lance’s name.Sniffling and trying to wipe away the tears as they came, Keith said, “Yeah.I…uh…I think I fucked up.Or he did.Or we both did.Or no one did.”

“Sounds complicated.”

“I…”

“Listen, I have to drive and I’d really prefer to not break the law.Are you going to be alright alone for a few minutes?”

“Yeah,” Keith mumbled.“I’ll just go stare in the mirror for another hour.”

“What?”

“Never mind.”

“I’ll be there soon.Love you.”

Taking a few deep breaths, trying to calm himself, Keith said, “See you soon.”Then he hung up and curled into a fetal position on the couch.Since thoughts of Lance didn’t disappear like he wished they would, he dug around under the cushions for the remote and turned the TV on, leaving it on the local news.They were doing a story about a stabbing, a map laying out the streets where it had occurred.It wasn’t nearly distracting enough, but it quickly faded into white noise, easing his heart rate.

When the front door opened, Keith didn’t move.He listened as keys clinked against the counter, as Shiro shuffled around, as the electric kettle boiled water, and as Shiro sank down onto the couch beside him, creaking under the added weight.A steaming mug was placed on the coffee table in front of Keith.In a whisper, Shiro said, “What can I do?”

“I don’t know.”

“Why don’t you tell me what happened?”

“Lance is going home.To New Mexico.In a week.”

“Oh,” Shiro said, resting a hand on Keith’s arm.“You freaked out on him, didn’t you?”

Scowling, Keith jerked against Shiro’s hand, trying to shake it off.Shiro sighed.“Alright, I probably could’ve said that more sensitively, but I’m not judging you, Keith, I’m just trying to understand what happened so that I can help you make it better.”

“Yeah,” Keith whispered.“I’m freaking out.”

“Lance really likes you. _Really_ likes you.I’m thinking you’re worried that’s going to change when he leaves, but he’ll be back in a few months.That’s not nearly long enough to ruin what you two have.Unless you let it.”

“Or he lets it.And why wouldn’t he?I’m a guy with a job at a diner who practically failed high school, hasn’t gone to college, and spends more time insulting him than…you’ve seen him, Shiro.He’s…beautiful and bright and energetic, as eager for attention as a golden retriever.He deserves someone…well, someone less fucking depressing.He’s going to realize that once he’s back in New Mexico and I’ll understand, but…but, god, Shiro, I’m in love with him.I’m so fucking in love with him.”

“Do you want to know what I’ve learned in my twenty-five years of life?” Shiro asked.

“Not really,” Keith mumbled.

“That you can’t tell someone what they deserve.They don’t care what you think.What they deserve is what they think they deserve.And I can promise you, Lance thinks he deserves you.”

“Yeah.Whatever.”

“Is that what you’re going to say to him when you see him again?”

“Maybe I won’t see him again,” Keith said, wrapping his arms tightly around his stomach.“It’ll make things easier.”

Sighing, Shiro stood.Kneeling down in front of the couch, bobbing his head around until he managed to catch Keith’s eyes, he said, “I can’t make you see how much he cares for you.I can’t make you understand your value.I can’t make you take a risk.Because it is a risk, Keith.I’m willing to recognize that.Your relationship is relatively new, the distance is long, and maybe something will happen, but there are things worth being afraid for and love is one of them.Obviously, I can’t make you see that, but you should think about the repercussions of your actions this time.Think before you run.Okay?Because if you don’t, I know you’ll regret the decision you make.”

In a small voice, Keith said, “Everyone leaves me.Why would he stay?”

“Our parents aren’t everyone.”

As always, when Shiro brought up their parents, his voice was filled with righteous indignation.Ever since he’d truly understood that the indifference they’d shown Keith was its own kind of abuse, he’d treated them with a cold distance. It was not something Keith had asked of him and as he always did, he felt the guilt seep in.Maybe it wasn’t his fault that Shiro had lost his parents, but it seemed like it was.

That feeling was enough.Keith started to sob.Not cry, but sob, tears and snot running down his face, his whole body quaking with each keen torn from his throat.“Oh, Keith,” Shiro said sadly, returning to the couch and resting his hand on Keith’s back, rubbing circles.

Everything hurt.His entire body.It was as though he was detached from it, unable to stop himself from crying.He only wished he was far enough away that he could avoid the pain of it all.But he couldn’t.That, he still felt deeply.

And in his pain, the only person he wanted, the only person he’d really let hold him, was Lance.That realization only made it worse.Because he couldn’t have Lance.Not now.Maybe not ever again.

Though he’d been so sure it would never end, the sobs tapered into hiccups and then he was finally able to sit up.Somewhere in the midst of his crying, Shiro had fetched a box of Kleenex.He immediately handed it over, along with the cup of hot chocolate.

Accepting them, Keith blew his nose and then breathed in the lukewarm hot chocolate, sniffling.Gently, Shiro brushed his bangs away from his face.“Can I say one last thing?” he asked.

“Why not?” Keith croaked.“I already cried.”

“The worst thing you can do is sit here alone and make a decision that affects the both of you.Talk to him.Tell him how you feel.Communication is what makes relationships work.I know it terrifies you, but if you love him, you need to try.” 

“There’s no way he wants to talk to me.”

“Yeah, he does,” Shiro said.“Lance loves to talk.” 

Keith laughed weakly.“God, does he.”

“Go to bed.When you wake up tomorrow, we’ll come up with a plan.It’ll be okay.I know it will.”

“Okay,” Keith whispered, picking himself up from the couch and holding the cup of hot chocolate in both of his hands.When he got to his room, he stopped and turned, shooting Shiro the best smile he could manage.It was probably a grimace, but Shiro smiled anyway, clearly getting the message.

Turning off the lights—it was the easiest way to pretend this wasn’t the bed where Lance had taken him apart so thoroughly with his hands only hours before—Keith sat down on the edge and finished his cocoa, focusing on the slide of the liquid down his throat with single-minded determination.When the mug was empty, he set it on the floor, huddled under the covers, and waited for sleep, hoping it would decide to visit.

 

It didn’t.Not really.It was possible he’d managed to drift off for an hour or two, but he was definitely awake when the creaks and whines of pipes filling with water informed him that Lance was also awake and about to shower.If he knocked, Lance would hear.

Rolling onto his side, Keith closed his eyes and listened.It wasn’t that he really expected Lance to sing—it would feel too much like a truce and they’d never been good at those—but he was still moping and just listening to Lance go about his day, even if all he could hear was the spray of water from a shower-head, was the kind of thing he felt like indulging in.

Five minutes later, he’d almost fallen back into an unsatisfactory doze, when Lance started to sing.

“Lying beside you, here in the dark, feeling your heartbeat with mine.Softly, you whisper.You’re so sincere.How could our love be so blind.We sailed on together, we drifted apart, and here you are by my side.”

Keith bolted up in bed, rubbing his aching eyes, and hardly believing what he was hearing.Lance wasn’t just singing.The song was by Journey, “Open Arms”, and he was singing a lot like he had on the rooftop, unthinkably gentle and genuine.It was a white flag.A peace offering.A plea.It was not what Keith had expected.Not at all.

Leaping from bed, he didn’t even bother pulling on jeans over his boxers.Shiro and Allura were in the living room, chatting together quietly when Keith came out.“Did you guys talk?” Shiro asked, eyebrows raised.

“No.”

“Then why are you going to his place?Don’t tell me you’ve decided murder is the easiest way out.”

Keith laughed and didn’t respond, out of the apartment in a flash.Banging his hand on Lance and Hunk’s door, he waited anxiously for Hunk to open it.When he did, Keith smiled in greeting and then shoved past him, heading straight for Lance’s room. 

“Woah, dude,” Hunk called.“You might want to…”

“It’s fine,” Keith said, not pausing.“I’ve seen it all already.”

“I didn’t need to know that.”

Bursting through the door, Keith picked his way across the floor littered with clothing and strolled into the bathroom.Lance was still singing and in here, the notes were pure and clear.If Keith could’ve recorded it, he would’ve, and never listened to Journey’s version ever again.

The shower curtain was pulled shut.In the back of his mind, Keith knew his next move was a bad idea, but he hardly cared.He’d been miserable all night and he’d been offered a chance he hadn’t expected.If he didn’t take it now, he knew he might not take it later.

Stepping forward, he grabbed the edge of the curtain and yanked it open.

A lot of things happened at once.Lance let out one of his high-pitched screams, swiveled, soap flying from his hand and hitting Keith in the face, before losing his footing and crashing into the floor in a flurry of bare limbs.It took Keith a moment to understand everything that had happened, but when he did, he said, “Fuck, Lance.Are you okay?”

“Why don’t you get in here and find out?” Lance grumbled.

“I’d rather not.”

“If you don’t get in here, pick me up, and kiss all of inevitable bruises later, I will retract the song and you’ll have to beg and grovel for another chance.”

Grimacing, Keith stepped into the shower, standing there for a second, feeling his clothes and hair get soaked, before leaning down, grasping one of Lance’s arms and hauling him up.Greeted with the sight of Lance dripping wet, beads of water clinging to his long eyelashes, Keith couldn’t breathe or think or talk or take serious note of Lance’s scowl.Reaching out, he brushed a thumb across Lance’s cheek and whispered, “How in the hell are you real?”

Lance bit his lip and glanced away.Finally, in a low voice, he said, “I have a final in thirty minutes.I need to finish showering.”

“Right,” Keith mumbled, removing his hand from Lance’s cheek and stepping back into the shower wall.He felt incredibly stupid.This was not what normal people did, especially after something like last night.“I’ll, uh…I’ll just go.”

“Wait,” Lance said, grabbing his arm.“Were you going to say something?”

“Huh?”

“Dude, you just stormed into my bathroom and assaulted me in the shower.” 

“Oh.Yeah, I guess I did.”Scratching the back of his neck, Keith said, “I kind of just…came over.I don’t know what I was going to say.”

“But you were going to say something?”

“Yeah.Probably.”

Lance nodded.“Okay.”

Not sure what exactly that meant, Keith nodded, and backed out of the shower, wincing as the wash of warm water disappeared and he was left shivering out on the hardwood floor.Picking up the soap, he handed it over to Lance and then closed the curtain. 

Slowly making his way out of Lance’s room, he didn’t even acknowledge Hunk as he left the apartment.Nor did he acknowledge Allura or Shiro when he was back in his own.He simply went to his room, stripped out of his wet clothes, ruffled his hair with a towel, and then fell down onto his bed.As he gazed at the ceiling, he felt his hope flag.That had gone the opposite of how he’d wanted it to go.There was no way Lance was going to talk to him now.He was such an idiot.An impulsive idiot.He sent a text to Pidge, informing her he wouldn’t be making it into work.When she asked why, he didn’t know what to say, so he ignored her.

 

“Where is the bastard?” 

Startling awake, Keith opened his eyes and saw Pidge storming into his room, Allura behind her, face concerned and apologetic.Grabbing a pair of jeans from the floor, she flung them into his face.“Stop pitying yourself and text me the fuck back when I text you.”

“You came here to yell at me about not texting you back?” Keith yawned.

“Do you know the last time you ignored me?”

“Uh…no.”

“Three years ago.It was the day you went on a bender and practically ended up in the hospital.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.Oh.”Pidge plopped down onto his bed and took his face in her hands.“Repeat after me.I will never ignore Pidge, my wonderfully forgiving best friend, ever again.”

“That’s a bit unrealistic, don’t you…”

She slapped him in the stomach, not hard, but not soft, either.“Say it.”

“I will never ignore Pidge, my wonderfully forgiving best friend, ever again.”

“Good,” she said.Removing her hands from Keith, she placed them in her lap, which was surprisingly phone-less.“After an hour, I was going a bit crazy I was so worried.But, of course, I was in school so I had to just sit there.Learning nothing.Which I hate.”

“I didn’t think.”

“Obviously.”

“I’m sorry, Pidge.”

She rolled her eyes.“It’s fine, Kogane.Are you okay?”

Keith shrugged.“Besides finding out that Lance is leaving in a week, fighting with him, scaring him in his shower this morning, getting hit in the face with a bar of soap, and accomplishing nothing, I’m alright.”

“You’ve been busy.”

“Yeah.What time is it?”

“One-thirty.”

Wincing, Keith ran his hand through his hair, still slightly damp, and considered his options.  Either he could sit here and wait for Lance to talk to him, which seemed as unlikely now as when he'd fallen asleep, or he could go seek Lance out himself and hope the incident this morning wasn't a deal breaker.  No matter what, someone needed to talk to someone, because Keith had kind of realized this morning as he'd listened to Lance sing Journey, that this was not something he was going to lose passively, just because he was afraid.  Glancing at Pidge, he said, “I hate to kick you out, but Lance is definitely done with his final by now and I kind of have to…talk to him.”

“About feelings?”

“Probably.”

“That explains why you were sleeping.”

Keith laughed and ruffled her hair, swiftly avoiding the slap she sent his way.That one he’d been expecting.“Again, sorry.I know you walked all this way for me.”

“It’s fine.I’ll just hang out with Allura for awhile.”

“Okay.I’m gonna…”

“Good luck.”

Keith smiled.He was about to get up when he remembered he was naked.Blushing, he said, “Could you, uh…”

“You’re naked, aren’t you?”

“Kind of.”

“How do you survive?” Pidge asked, shaking her head mockingly and leaving his room, the door snicking shut behind her.Quickly getting dressed, Keith looked himself over once in his bathroom mirror and then submitted to the inevitable, recalling Shiro’s words last night and drawing strength from those.Lance hadn’t given up on him yet—probably—and Keith did love him.If he let Lance go, he would hate himself for it.

As he left, Pidge and Allura wished him luck from the couch. 

This time, knocking on Lance’s door was a lot more difficult.It wasn’t an impulsive decision, coming over here, and the conversation he was about to have was an important one.If he fucked it up, Lance would disappear for three months and that would be it.  An impasse over that much distance and that much time was insurmountable.

Finally, after straightening his shirt and putting his hair up, Keith rapped on the door.Surprisingly, Lance was the one to open it, tub of ice cream in hand.Unsure how to start the conversation properly, Keith said, “Was the final that bad?”

“No.I think I killed it, actually.The ice cream is for you, you psychotic weirdo.”

“Right.”

“So, Kogane," he said, lazily, only his fidgeting giving away how nervous he was, "why should I let you in?I’ve got ice cream and she’s the only friend I need.”

“Friendship level five,” Keith blurted.

“What?”

“You’re friendship level five and I’ve been treating you like a friendship level two and I want to fix that.” 

Letting go of the door and leaning up against the jamb, Lance picked the spoon up out of the carton and started eating.“What perks does friendship level two get over one?”

“Fuck if I know.”

“I knew you didn’t actually have levels.”

Rolling his eyes, Keith said, “Just let me in.”

“I’d be nicer if I were you.”

“Lance, I am five seconds away from—fuck, I don’t know—actually losing my goddamn mind and I’m really scared and on edge and hopelessly in love and I just need you to let me in and listen to me, because if you don’t, I will collapse in on myself like a dying star and I really don’t want to be a black hole.That’s depressing.”

“It sounds appropriately emo to me,”Then the spoon fell from Lance’s mouth, back into the carton, and he said, “Wait.What did you say?”

“Let me in.”

“No, not that part.The hopelessly in love part.”

Flushing, Keith stuck to his message, unable to comment on that.He hadn’t really realized he’d said it.He wasn’t going to take it back, though.It was undeniably true.“Let.Me.In.”

“Yeah, alright,” Lance said, opening the door wider and stepping out of the way. 

Keith entered, peered around the living room, and said, “Where’s Hunk?”

“Studying with Shay.”

Turning around, he watched as Lance kept his distance, shoveling more ice cream into his mouth and leaning against the kitchen counter.“I’ll say my part first, if that’s alright with you.”

“Sure.”

“You freaked out on me last night, man, and I needed you to not freak out on me.We’re in the exact same position and I needed you to tell me it was going to be okay, that we could make it work, not stare at yourself in the mirror and go all taciturn and silent, like Russell Crowe in eighty percent of his movie roles.Okay, your turn.”

“I’m sorry,” Keith said, hit with a new wave of guilt.“I did freak out and I’m sorry.”

“That’s all you’ve got?”

“No.Just…can’t we do this on the couch?Where you’re not twenty feet away from me?”

Lance nodded, walking forward and brushing past Keith, flopping down on the couch and immediately resuming his ice cream consumption.There was a smudge of chocolate over his top lip and Keith desperately wanted to lick it off, but he suspected such a move would be unwanted at the moment. 

Lance raised his eyebrows.

“Right, sorry,” Keith said.“I don’t really know where to start.”

“I suggest starting.Best way to find one.”

Taking a deep breath, Keith slowly picked his way through the thoughts in his brain.“When you said you were going home, I panicked.It hadn’t really occurred to me that you were leaving anytime soon, even though it should’ve, and it caught me by surprise.Add that on top of what we’d, uh, done right before and I was kind of a mess.Not that that is even relevant, because I’m still a mess, but I guess it explains my headspace in the moment.

“I don’t know what I’m doing, Lance.I know I’ve said that before, but I really don’t.Not just in romantic relationships, but in any relationship.I don’t have many and that’s okay, but I’m not used to…I’m not used to people caring about me.There’s Shiro and Pidge and neither one of them have ever left because they haven’t needed to, but…but everyone else who’s left hasn’t come back.My adoptive parents left me almost the second they adopted me and all of my friendships in high school were…”

“Bad,” Lance guessed.

“Yeah.And you’re not like them, I know that, I just…I keep thinking that you’re going to go home, you’re going to see your family, you’re going to see people you grew up with, and you’re going to realize I’m the opposite of what you want.Because I’m kind of…well, I don’t really know why you like me.

“I freaked out because I…”Keith wanted to say he loved Lance, because that was what it really all came down to, but he couldn’t say it, even after all that had come before.Falling silent, he stared down at his lap and counted the seconds that passed.

“Because why?” Lance whispered.

“You know why.”

Scooting forward, Lance rested his hands on either side of Keith’s face, and gently pulled it up.Their eyes met and Keith waited anxiously, willing and ready to accept whatever conclusion Lance came to as long as he came to one in the next couple of seconds.

“You’re such an idiot.”

Bristling, Keith said, “Yeah, well, sorry you’re dating an idiot.Luckily, you can break up with me right here and now and we can all move on.”

Closing his eyes, Lance said, “Okay, sorry, that wasn’t helpful.It was just the only thing I could come up with.Because you are if you seriously think I’m not going to call you every goddamn day and talk to you until you threaten to murder me and hang up.”

Keith shrugged.

Face turning deadly serious, Lance pushed Keith’s bangs from his face and said, “Keith Kogane, I love you.Alright?I love you because your mullet is the stupidest thing I’ve ever seen, but you somehow manage to pull it off.On a side note, I’m still trying to figure out how that’s actually possible.Just so you know.  Anyway," he said dramatically, drawing out the 'y', "I love you because you’re talented and smart and ridiculous and impulsive.Because you always rise to my bait and accept any challenge I throw your way.I love you because you’re funny and dramatic and a really big fucking asshole.”

“Oh, sure, that makes sense.”

“Not really.”

“Maybe you should just…”

Lance crossed the distance between them and kissed him gently, tasting of ice cream.In a whisper, he said, “It doesn’t have to make sense, mullet-head.Anyone would tell you that love doesn’t make sense.All I know is that you’re what I want.You.Every single last goddamn piece of you.And if you think I’m the kind of person who forgets about someone I love in a measly three months, you really don’t know me at all.”

Frowning, Keith allowed all of that to sink in, still feeling the tingle in his lips from Lance’s kiss.It was hard to imagine it was real, but then he looked back up at Lance, finding his smile and his bright blue eyes—two of the most real things in his life—and Keith knew it was.In an awed voice, he said, “We’re fucking crazy.”

“We’ll make it work.You trust me, don’t you, Kogane?”

Finally grinning, Keith nodded.“Yeah.I do.”

“Awesome.Can I kiss you senseless now?Are we good?”

Not even bothering to formulate a response, Keith climbed into Lance’s lap and kissed him until he was breathless and dizzy, drunk on Lance and all that he'd given him.


	13. Chapter Thirteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we've reached the end. This turned out a lot differently than I originally imagined, but I still like how it ends and I hope you do, too.  
> You have all been crazy amazing and I really didn't expect this story to get this much traction and it's so nice. I sincerely hope you can come back to this every once in awhile and delight in the gratuitous amount of fluff.  
> Also, thank you, Camille. I wouldn't have written this without you and that would've been a fucking tragedy, lbr.
> 
> P.S. Kind of largely unedited but I'm lazy rn. I'll come back and correct mistakes later probs.

“So I’m leaving tomorrow.”

Keith burrowed his face further into Lance’s neck, not saying a word in response.Part of him was begging him to memorize what it felt like: Lance’s hand trailing up and down his spine, his legs intertwined with Lance’s, skin sliding against skin, Lance’s breath stirring his hair, the sound of Lance’s slow and steady heartbeat.The other part of him told him not to, because acknowledging the need to do so would be acknowledging how little time they had left and Keith did not want to do that.He was not fond of goodbyes, nor was he good at them.

“7:30 in the morning,” Lance continued, “which means I have to leave here around 5:30 or so and I know you don’t like waking up early and I’m not saying you have to get up and say goodbye, but it would be nice.It also means you should probably spend the night in your own place, because I have to go to sleep like an hour ago and I don’t want to…”

“Shut up,” Keith grumbled.“I’m staying.”

“I’m going to wake you up.Bright and early.You won’t have to go to works for hours and hours.I’m sure I’ll start singing just to wake myself up and then you’ll want to murder…”

“I’m staying.”

“Is it because you love me?”

Groaning, Keith pinched Lance in the side.He shrieked and Keith smiled against Lance’s skin, pressing a soft kiss against his neck in apology.

“No, but really, is it?”

Sighing, Keith slipped his face from Lance’s neck and propped his chin on his shoulder.“We are naked in bed together, I’m coming to the airport with you tomorrow, and I told you how I…felt, and you’re asking me if I love you?”

“Listen, man, you only said it once and you totally didn’t mean to.”

“Does it matter to you?”

“Well, I mean…”

Leaning over Lance, Keith kissed him on the forehead, interrupting his words.“Don’t make it a joke,” he murmured.“If it matters, you just have to tell me it matters.”

“I’m kind of an insecure mess,” Lance said.

“And I kind of prefer actions to words.”

Nodding, Lance gently guided Keith back down to his chest.They laid there in silence for a long time and then Lance said, “Wait.You’re coming to the airport with me tomorrow?”

Keith shrugged.“Yeah.”

“I get it,” Lance said, the smile clear in his voice.“That’s a big old ‘I love you’ from Keith Kogane, isn’t it?”

“I just like airports.”

“Bullshit.Airports have people.And lines.And required interactions with strangers.”

“God, don’t remind me.”

“You don’t have to come, you know,” Lance whispered.

“Yeah, I do.”

“There’s no way you like goodbyes.”

Keith huffed out a laugh, genuinely surprised, even after all the time they’d spent together, that Lance would know something about him that Keith hadn’t explicitly spelled out.“I hate them, actually.”

“God, you really do love me.”

“Weren’t you supposed to be asleep an hour ago?”

“Yep.Totally.But, like I’ve told you before, you’re really distracting.And, to be honest, now that I know what you look like all flushed and desperate, it’s a lot worse.”

Rolling his eyes, Keith slipped out of the bed and headed towards the light switch on the wall.Doing his best to ignore Lance’s wolf-whistles, he flicked the lights off.When he returned, he easily found Lance and resumed his previous position.They’d only fallen asleep together once, but it turned out they were both more than happy to cuddle and lose feeling in half of their limbs, and Keith had never been more grateful for anything.Kissing Lance somewhere, Keith mumbled, “Night.”

“Are you even tired?”

“Go to sleep, Lance.”

“Because I’m not really tired.In fact, I think we should go another round.Little Lance is definitely ready.”

“You did not just call your dick Little Lance.”

“I definitely did, babe.What do you say?”

“Go to sleep.”

“But, Keith, I’m not sure it’s possible to sleep when…”

“You are going to be so fucking tired when 5:30 rolls around.”

“ _We’re_ going to be tired.”

“What do I have to do to make you shut up?”

“I think you know what.”

“I hate you.”

“That is not what your hands are saying.Like, at all.I suggest moving them down a little further if you really want…oh, fuck.”

“Satisfied?”

“Just about.”

 

“Hey,” Shiro said, stopping the car in the far lane of the drop-off area, “I’m going to circle.Take your time.And Lance?It was really nice to meet you and I know I’m not the only one who is going to miss you.”

“Thanks, Shiro.”

“Got all your stuff?”

“Think so.”

“Alright.My job is done, then.”

Lance laughed and slid across the backseat to hug Hunk.They were laughing at each other, murmuring something, and then Lance pulled away.“You coming in?”

“Nah,” Hunk replied.“I’ve been saying goodbye to you for years.Plus, you know how much I look forward to having the apartment all to myself.”It was a joke, but Hunk’s eyes were about to overflow with tears.

“I’ll miss you, man.”

“I’ll miss you, too.Say hi to the family for me.”

“Always,” Lance said, getting out of the car.Keith watched in the side mirror as he disappeared behind the car, grabbing his bags from the trunk.Shiro nudged him with an elbow, but he didn’t move or acknowledge the gesture.Instead, he turned his eyes to his lap and counted veins in his hand, almost immediately losing track of where he was.

There was a knock on the window and Keith saw Lance peering in at him, his expression kind and understanding.No words needed to be said.Keith knew Lance was offering to go ahead without him.

“You’ll regret it,” Shiro murmured.

Running a shaky hand through his hair, Keith got out of the car.Without a word, he picked up one of Lance’s bags and aimed straight for the rotating door, not bothering to see if Lance was following.He wanted to memorize every aspect of Lance’s face, but he also couldn’t stand to look at him.He was tired, grumpy, and aching.It wasn’t a great combination and despite his wish to leave Lance with a good memory, he simply wasn’t in the mood.

They proceeded to the counter for Southwest Airlines and Lance took over, greeting the woman there with a smile and a chipper, warm hello.As she checked him into his flight and helped check two of his bags, they fell into an easy conversation about where he was headed and the sort of weather found in New Mexico.

When they finished, Lance with one carry-on in hand and a mellow expression, Keith mumbled, “To security?”

“I’ve got some time, you know.I mean, I should definitely go soon, but we could…”Lance paused, glancing around them, and then pointing to a set of chairs against the far wall.One was occupied by a woman shoving things from a larger bag, likely one she wanted to check, and into her carry on.“We could hang out there for awhile.”

“Whatever.”

Letting his arm fall, Lance slipped his hand into Keith’s and squeezed it hard, leading him over to the chairs.The woman gave them a strange look when she saw them and hurriedly zipped up her bags, moving away. 

“Do you think it was because I smiled at her or because she’s homophobic?”

Keith shrugged and Lance sighed, slumping down into one of the chairs.“I got to say, I wouldn’t want you to be the one sending me off to war.You know, how in all the movies, the women are, like, holding babies and kissing their husbands on the cheek and being like ‘I love you, I’ll wait for you, please don’t die?’You’d suck at that.”

“Probably.”

“Take a picture with me.”

“I hate pictures,” Keith said, feeling sorry for himself.It was probably immature and unhelpful, but Keith just wanted the day to be over with.He wanted to go to security right now, rip the band-aid off before he could think about it too much.It felt wrong to say that, though, especially to Lance, who would probably take it the wrong way.

“Babe, I’m on the verge of freaking the fuck out.Take a goddamn picture with me.Please.”

“I’m going to look miserable.”

“That’s fine.It’s a good representation.”

Trying not to resent that comment, Keith leaned his head against Lance’s shoulder and stared into the camera of Lance’s phone, briefly attempting a smile.But it was so pained that he let it fall away.Lance tried valiantly to smile, but the end result was the most pathetic thing Keith had ever seen.He fought with his desire to say, ‘I told you so.’

“Probably should’ve taken one yesterday, in hindsight,” Lance said, an attempt at humor in his voice.The realization how hard Lance was trying, how considerate he was being, hit Keith and made him feel terrible.

“Fuck,” he whispered.“I’m sorry.”

“Hey,” Lance replied, wrapping an arm awkwardly around Keith’s waist.“It’s okay.It’s not like I expected you to be bubbly or something.Not that I would ever describe you as bubbly, even if someone had a knife to my throat and told me to say it.”

“I know.But I could be doing better.”

“Well, that’s true.”

Turning to Lance, Keith said, “Tell me something happy.Tell me something that will make me forget you’re leaving in less than an hour.”

“I’m wearing a big enough jacket that we could wrap you up in it and pretend to be a human who was born with four legs and arms?It might work.I’m willing to try.”

“That jacket is not big enough.”

“We’re pretending, Keith.Pretend with me.”

“Okay,” Keith whispered, retaking Lance’s hand and pulling him up.Lance stood slowly, looking confused.Not bothering to explain, Keith unzipped the jacket and pressed himself tight to Lance, wrapping his arms around his waist.“Zip me in.”

With some struggle, Lance managed, mumbling something about his jacket being permanently stretched.Keith closed his eyes and sunk into the warmth, taking deep breaths until his mind was settled, until he felt as though the world had slowed and he and Lance could extend that hour into days, years.

“I don’t have to go home,” Lance said in a rush.“I don’t.It’s not like anybody would mind.I mean, it would suck, but I’m like ninety percent sure this sucks a lot more.We could go back out to the car right now and…”

“Lance, I’ve seen your bedroom.You have to go home.”

“Fuck, Keith, we’re about to enter the best phase of a relationship.The ‘can’t keep our hands off each other’ phase and I’m going to miss it because I’m a pathetic loser who is constantly homesick even though he’s twenty-one and he’s been living away from his family for years.”

“I’m not everything,” Keith said softly.

“I know,” Lance said.“I know, but sometimes it feels like you are.”

“How in the hell did I manage that?”

“I don’t know.Must be the mullet.I’m convinced it has magical properties.”

At that, Keith laughed.They both tensed in surprise, not quite believing it was possible at a time like this, and then Lance laughed, too, kissing the top of Keith’s head.“We are going to be alright, aren’t we?”

“Yeah,” Keith said.

“I should probably go.”

“Okay.”

Lance unzipped his jacket and Keith stepped out of his arms, briefly running a thumb over Lance’s bottom lip, before saying, “Hey, take out your phone.Let’s try that picture again.”

“Yeah?” Lance asked, smiling shyly.

“Yeah.”

Raising his phone into the air, he pulled Keith into his side and smiled, managing something much closer to the real thing.Though Keith’s smile was close-lipped, it was genuine.Lance took a couple more and Keith made sure to kiss him on the cheek for one.

Lowering the phone, Lance scrolled through the results and grinned.“Your face is dumb here,” he said, showing Keith something blurry and altogether awful.“Oh, but I like this one.”Just looking at it, Keith knew that was taken after he’d kissed Lance on the cheek.He was still looking at him and his expression could only be described as fond and adoring.“I’m going to make it my background.”

“Please don’t.That’s disgusting.”

“Hey, I’m sentimental and proud of it.”

Lance puttered around on his phone for a moment, most likely changing the background just as he’d promised, and then shoved it back into his pocket.“I guess I’m going,” he said.

“I’ll walk you as far as I can.”

“Cool.”

They set off, hands linked, until they reached a line of people, booths with TSA agents at the end.Keith let go of Lance’s hand and seriously considered saying nothing, just walking back out of the airport, finding Shiro, and going home.

“Stay with me, Kogane,” Lance said, setting down his bag.“No running off until I’ve got something to get me through the flight.If I don’t, I’ll probably end up in the cockpit, begging the pilot to turn us around and then he’ll get irritated and I won’t listen to him and then I’ll end up in jail and it’ll be your fault.”

Crossing his arms over his chest, Keith sniffed, trying to resist the urge to cry, and stared hard at the ground, desperately wanting to tease Lance for how much he was talking, but busy realizing that was one of the things he was going to miss the most.

“Dude, you can’t cry.I’ll cry.”

“I’m not going to cry,” Keith said, avoiding Lance’s eyes as he rose to the tips of his toes and curled his arms around Lance’s neck.

“You kind of looked like you were about to cry,” Lance murmured into his ear, resting his arms low around Keith, hands flat on Keith’s lower back.

“Stop talking about crying.”

Falling silent, Lance held him tightly, his forehead resting on Keith’s shoulder.Breathing Lance in, the scent of his cologne very faint, Keith allowed himself to slot it away in his brain, allowed himself to recognize that this was the last hug from Lance he was going to get for awhile.

Into his ear, Lance whispered, “I love you, sweetheart.”

“Fuck.”

“You don’t have to…”

“Shut up,” Keith said.“Give me a minute.”

“I’ll give you as long as you want.I’m not entirely sure I can let go of you.Like, my arms might be glued to your body.Ooh, if we went to that kind of scary man up there and told him we were glued together, do you think he’d let us both through?”

“You’re such an idiot,” Keith said.

“Are those really the last words you want to…”

“And I love you.”

There was a long pause and then Lance said, “Well, those are lots better.”

Removing himself from Lance’s arms, having to pry them away, Keith stared at him, doing the memorizing he hadn’t been willing to do before, and then, out of nowhere, surprising even him, he said, “Give me your jacket.”

“Getting down and dirty in the airport?I didn’t know you had it in you, Kogane.”

“Lance.”

“It’s my favorite jacket,” Lance whined.

“Wonderful.You’ll have to come back and get it.”

“Fine.But I get your sweatshirt.”

“Okay,” Keith said, removing his sweatshirt, leaving him bare-chested in front of dozens of people.Before he could get embarrassed, Lance shrugged out of his jacket and handed it over.Putting it on, Keith zipped it up and turned his nose into the collar and smiled.

“You know what,” Lance said, eyes wide, “you can keep it forever.”

“Like it?”

“Yeah,” Lance said, stepping forward.“If I didn’t have to go and we weren’t in the middle of an airport, I would get down on my knees and suck you off.”

Keith’s mouth went dry.Crossing the little distance left between them, Keith kissed Lance on the mouth, hard, carding his fingers into Lance’s hair.The kiss quickly turned into something heavy and fervent and Keith detached himself as quickly as he could, before it would hurt him more than it already was to let Lance go.

“I’ll call you when I land,” Lance said.

“Okay.”

“Keep Hunk company.”

“I will.”

“Good, good.Okay, well…”

“Yeah,” Keith said.“Bye, Lance.”

“Bye, darling.”

Lance walked backwards for a few steps, eyes locked on Keith, before he turned and stood in line.Keith thought about staying, watching until he could no longer see Lance, but he couldn’t bear the thought of Lance looking back with pleading eyes.So he left, hands in Lance’s jacket pockets.

 

“So I landed.”

“How’s New Mexico?” Keith asked, closing his eyes and trying to imagine that Lance was right next to him, talking into his ear.

“Sunny.Warm.My family says hi.”

“Told them about me already?”

“Yeah, like two seconds in.I was kind of crying, so…”

“Jesus, Lance.”

“It was a bad flight,” Lance murmured.“The poor kid sitting next to me decided right then and there that he never wanted to grow up.Can’t say I blame him.”

“Hell, I feel bad for that kid.”

“That’s because you’re emotionally stunted.”

“Yeah, that’s true,” Keith said, tugging Lance’s jacket closer.“I don't really talk on the phone, you know.”

“You’re going to have to get used to it.”

“Okay.”

“That being said, I do have to go.There’s unpacking and then my family wants to…well, I’ll be busy all night.I’d way rather talk to you, to be honest, but there’s not really…”

“Lance, it’s alright.Go.”

“I already miss you.”

“Yeah.Me too.”

“What have you been…”

“Lance.”

“Okay, okay, I’m going.I love you,” Lance said.

“Talk to you later, I guess.”

“Definitely.”

Keith hung up and grabbed his covers, pulling them up over his head, desperate to shut out the world for a couple of hours.

 

_P: Have you died?_

_K: Sure_

_P: We’re all worried about you.Shiro said he hasn’t seen you in over a day._

_K: I’m just in my room.He could see me whenever he wants_

_P: Getting out of your room will help.Actually talking to people at work will help._

_K: Yeah_

_P: Does that mean you’re going to?_

_K: Probably not_

_K: I’ve been riding Red_

_P: I’m rolling my eyes at you._

_P: Keith, for fuck’s sake, it’s Lance.One person.You have lots of other people.Suck it up, get over yourself, and adapt._

_K: I don’t like you_

_P: Someone had to deliver the tough love._

_K: Ugh_

_P: What’s it feel like?_

_K: I don’t want to talk about feelings_

_P: Keith._

_K: I don’t know_

_K: Like I’m missing something vital, something bright, I guess_

_P: That blows._

_K: Yeah_

_P: Come over.Matt and I are playing video games.You don’t have to talk._

_K: …okay_

 

“No.”

“Good morning, baby!” Lance crowed. 

“Did you have to work at a bakery?”

“Listen, they’re the only ones who can put up with me and I’ve been working here since I was thirteen.I’m not going to go find somewhere else to work just because my boyfriend doesn’t like wake up calls at 6:00.”

Groaning, Keith put his phone on speaker and rolled over onto his stomach, shoving his face into a pillow.If he was a normal person who didn’t spend almost every second of every day missing Lance, he would’ve hung up.But he wasn’t and he did.And the truth was, the gaping hole in his chest would fill the second he heard Lance’s voice, because he could imagine they were together.It was nothing short of addicting.

“That was not a normal groan.Did you not sleep last night?”

“Not much,” Keith admitted.

“Are you ever gonna tell me what you’re nightmares are about?”

“Shiro dying, mostly.”

“Oh.”

“Fuck, sorry,” Keith said.“This is why you shouldn’t call me this early.”

“Are you seriously apologizing for telling me something about yourself?I love it when you do that, man, even when it makes me want to cry.”

“It’s why high school sucked, you know,” he said, reminding himself over and over again that this was Lance he was talking to.“Shiro was gone.Over in Afghanistan.It was just me and my adoptive parents who didn’t give a fuck and Shiro was away getting blown up for all I knew.”

“Explains the grades.”

“Does it?”

“Definitely, babe,” Lance said.If Keith listened closely, he could hear the babbling and screaming of other members of the family.Keith couldn’t quite believe they all got up this early, but they were always there in the background when Lance called, without fail.“I kind of gotta go.You should go back to sleep.I can’t have that face getting screwed up because you’re a sleep-deprived idiot.”

“I’ve still got two months to fuck it up.”

“Yeah,” Lance whispered.

“Yeah.”

“I’ll call you after work and we can complain about it for hours.Maybe even get off.How do you feel about phone sex?”

“It’s too early for this,” Keith mumbled, his traitor heart picking up its pace.

“It’s never too early for phone sex.”

“Jesus.”

“I miss your breathy little moans,” Lance said in a low and quiet voice, clearly trying not to attract his family’s attention.

“I miss everything.”

“Yeah.That too.”

“Bye, Lance.”

“Bye, Keith.I love you.”

 

He was over at Pidge’s, trying not to think about Lance.They’d had a fight last night and it was really pissing Keith off that he couldn’t force himself into Lance’s space and yell until they realized how stupid they were being and made out instead.Pidge had insisted company would help, but after they’d lost a fight with a boss over ten times—switching the controller back and forth each time—Pidge had started scrolling through her phone, leaving Keith to do the same.

The problem was, Lance had infiltrated his life so thoroughly that even going on his phone was dangerous.There was definitely a missed call or two, Lance was his background picture, and the longer they’d been apart, the more things reminded Keith of Lance.

“Hey, you know Lance’s birthday is the 28th, right?” Pidge asked.

“Of when?”

“July?This month?Two days from now?Obviously you didn’t know.”

“Cool.I get to miss his birthday.Why are we talking about Lance?” Keith asked, feeling his temper swell.

“I was just thinking we could go shopping together sometime.For a present, you know.That we could send to him?”

“Whatever.”

“Alright,” Pidge said, setting down her phone and piercing Keith with her eyes, “talk.What the hell did the two of you fight about?Because he’s miserable and keeps texting me and I’m legitimately about to crazy.I did not sign up to deal with two lovesick losers.”

“Tell him to bug Hunk.”

“He is, Keith.He says you’re not answering his calls.”

“He knows what we’re arguing about.Ask him.”

“He doesn’t, actually,” Pidge said.

Sighing, Keith got up off the couch and fled into the kitchen.He was grateful that Pidge didn’t follow.Finding a glass in one of the cupboards, he filled it with tap water and sipped it as he stared out the window over the sink.The sun was nowhere near setting—the joys of summer—and Keith thought about the last month and a half.To say it had been awful was an understatement.He’d managed to do plenty of stuff; work, watching movies with Hunk, hanging out with Shiro and Allura—which involved anything from hiking to day trips—and taking Pidge around town on Red.But there was this persistent, underlying ache that never went away.And every time it pulsed, it reminded Keith why he’d been so reluctant to do something as stupid as fall in love in the first place.

The fight last night had been stupid.He hadn’t been angry at Lance, he’d been angry at their situation, but he’d taken it out on Lance, who’d gone from baffled to argumentative in seconds.

Why he couldn’t just explain that he would do anything for one whole day with Lance was beyond him.That wouldn’t result in a fight.But, no, he’d had to explain it through irritated quips and thinly-veiled accusations, as though Lance were solely to blame for their predicament.

Draining the glass, Keith set it on the counter by the dishwasher, but he didn’t move from the window. 

Pidge came up beside him a few minutes later.“You’ve got to call him, Keith.”

Keith nodded.He knew, he did.But it hurt.That was the hardest part of being this far away from Lance.Every minute, he was desperate for the sound of his voice, to hear about his day, but when he actually did, it only hurt him, only served to remind him that they weren’t a wall away.

“And you should go home,” Pidge continued.“Shiro wants to talk to you.”

“How do you know more about my life than I do?”

“Because when you get like this, you kind of disappear from your life.”

“Oh, yeah.That.”

“Was this what you were like when Shiro was in Afghanistan?” Pidge asked.

“That was worse,” Keith mumbled. _Probably_ , he corrected himself.

They talked for awhile longer about nothing in particular and then Keith said his goodbyes, walking home with his hands shoved deep into the pockets of Lance’s jacket.He’d began thinking of it as his, he wore it so often.It certainly smelled more like him than Lance these days.

When he got home, both Shiro and Allura were there, doing a disturbing amount of absolutely nothing.Allura was not the nothing type.Eyeing them suspiciously, Keith sat down on the opposite end of the couch and said, “Pidge mentioned you wanted to talk?”

“Yeah,” Shiro said, exchanging a quick glance with Allura.

“You guys get engaged or something?”

“No,” Allura said hurriedly.“No.Your brother is simply concerned you’re going to take what he has to offer entirely the wrong way.You have to understand, Keith, we love you and we dislike seeing you like this and we’re very aware that this is something you could do for yourself if you wanted, but we wanted to do it for you.”

Looking at Shiro, Keith said, “I’m fine.I don’t need your pity gifts.”

“It’s not a pity gift,” Shiro sighed.“If it helps, you can think of it as Lance’s birthday present from the two of us instead.”

“What?”

“We got you a plane ticket to New Mexico.It leaves tomorrow night.Lance’s parents know, but Lance doesn’t.We thought he might like the surprise for his birthday, but you can tell him if you want.”

“You got me a plane ticket.”

Allura nodded.“Shiro and I split the fare.It wasn’t all that expensive and Lance’s family is absolutely delightful, so it was an utter joy setting it up with them.They’ll be there to pick you up.”

“You don’t have to go,” Shiro added.“It’s entirely up to you.”

“But…”

“Pidge and Matt both know you’ll be missing work.”

“When do I come back?” Keith murmured, the news still working its way into his conscious.

“You get a week.Lance’s family was more than happy to have you for that long.They already seem to think you’re the greatest thing ever.”Shiro smiled.“I expect that has a lot to do with Lance.”

“Probably,” Keith said.“Thanks, guys.”

“So you’re going to go?”

“Yeah.I’ve got to…”Keith didn’t finish the sentence.He simply stood and retreated into his room, closing the door behind him.Breaking into a grin, he finally called Lance back.

But Lance didn’t pick up.Trying not to be offended, because it was exactly what he deserved, Keith instead thought about his plane ticket.Tomorrow he’d be in New Mexico.Where Lance was. 

“Fuck,” Keith mumbled, calling Lance again.“Pick up you dumbass.”

“Keith,” Lance answered breathlessly on the fourth ring.“Oh god, I’m so sorry.I didn’t mean to miss your last call, I was just playing with Clara.Fuck, I also forgot I was going to be mad at you.Hang on…ahem…why the fuck did you not answer my calls?I don’t even know why you’re upset with me and ignoring my calls is not going to solve a goddamn thing.If you haven’t noticed, we’re kind of hundreds of miles apart right now and this is about the only way I can communicate with you.”

It was so good to hear his voice.It was so good to know he’d get to see Lance’s mouth forming those very words in a day.Unable to stop himself, Keith started to laugh, loudly and without restraint.He could almost hear Lance’s indignation, but it completely disappeared when Keith said, “Fuck, I love you.”

“Okay, so you’re in a good mood.Which is strange.”

“I’m sorry about last night,” Keith said.“I wasn’t mad at you.I just can’t stand how much I miss you, sometimes.”

“What the fuck have you done to my boyfriend?I’d like him back.I was looking forward to arguing with him for an hour or two.”

“I’m just happy.”  
“Alright, weirdo.”

“How come you didn’t tell me your birthday was in a couple of days?” Keith asked.

“Oh, well, I thought it might make you feel guilty or something stupid, so I just wasn’t going to say anything.”

“It’s your birthday, Lance.I would’ve wanted to know.”

“Okay.Good to know.Buying me anything?”

“That’s why I’m happy.I’ve got a good present for you.” _For the both of us._

“Oh yeah?Do tell.”

“It’s a surprise, idiot,” Keith said, smiling into the phone. 

“Fuck yes.I love surprises.”

“Good.”

“I think my family is planning a surprise for me, too.They’re doing insane amounts of whispering.I’ve spent about eighty percent of the day listening at doors and sneaking around.All I’ve learned is that it’s going to blow my fucking mind.”

“I bet,” Keith said.

“You know something, don’t you?”

“Nope.”

“You’re an awful liar.”

“You’re worse.”

“Not everything is a contest, Kogane,” Lance teased.

“It is between us.”

“Yeah, okay, true.Tell me about your day.I’ve got at least five really good stories for you, so if we’re making it a competition, you better come up with six really good stories for me.”

Grinning, Keith settled down on his bed and started talking, filling Lance in on his entire day, only skipping over the conversations related to the flight tomorrow.They fell into the comfortable pattern and rhythm of their conversations and Keith was glad the minor spat hadn’t affected anything.

 

Keith was terribly nervous, his hands sweating around the straps of his backpack.Walking past security, he glanced around him, unsure who exactly he was looking for.Shiro hadn’t said who would be coming to pick him up and he only vaguely knew what Lance’s family looked like.The airport was big, kind of ugly, and the vision that greeted him outside of the windows was flat and barren desert.It was very different from where he’d come and it only increased his anxiety.

Deciding all he could do was walk, Keith kept moving, following the signs. 

Only seconds later, there was a shout, “Keith?Keith Kogane?”

He whipped around and saw a woman holding a sign that read his name, a young girl standing beside her.They both looked exactly like Lance, especially the girl.It had to be Clara.Lance’s mother was softer, pudgier, had an accent, and an undeniably happy to see him, judging by her smile.She looked a lot like how Keith had always imagined a mother should look.

Walking over sheepishly, he reached them and held out his hand.“Uh, hi.I’m Keith.”

“Esperanza,” she said, gripping his hand tightly, before pulling him into a hug.It was unexpected by not entirely unwelcome.When she pulled away, she gestured to Clara and said, “And this is…”

“Clara,” Keith interrupted, knowing that would win him points.And he was desperately trying to win those.

“You have dumb hair.”

“Clara,” Esperanza scolded.

Keith laughed.“Don’t worry about it.Lance likes to call me mullet-head.Must run in the family.”

“Can I call you mullet-head?”

“Uh…sure.”

Clara nodded, her shoulder length hair bobbing with her head.Looking down at his hands, Keith tried to think of something to say, but was drawing an absolute blank.Thankfully, Esperanza didn’t seem to mind.She shot him another smile and then said, “Well, let’s get you home.It will be overwhelming, but Lance will be there and he’ll be so excited to see you.He talks of nothing else.”

“He talks a lot about you, too,” Keith said, following them out to a strip of road where cars were waiting.There was one such car, a minivan, idling and behind the wheel was someone who looked almost nothing like Lance, except for his eyes.

“He’s a good boy,” Esperanza said, waving to her husband, who pulled the car up to where they were standing.Esperanza opened the door into the backseat and Clara crawled in, sliding over to the far seat so Keith could get in.He did, slinging his backpack into the middle.

He introduced himself to Lance’s father, Carl, and then they were off, driving to god knows where.It occurred to Keith that he probably should’ve found out where exactly they were, but it wasn’t like he’d particularly cared.He just wanted to see Lance.

Thankfully, Lance’s family largely left him alone, chatting among themselves, though they did ask a couple of polite questions about the flight and how he was feeling and asking if the setup back at their house was alright with him.Esperanza also made sure to describe context if the conversation trailed far from Keith’s understanding.It was nice to have people who hardly knew him treating him like he was a part of their group and Keith could see exactly how Lance had come from a family like this, could see why he would miss them so badly.They all had strong personalities and a lot of love to give.

They reached a small house in a suburban neighborhood.There was no lawn, just some desert, but large hills in the background.It was beautiful.Beautiful in a very different way from home, but still beautiful. 

“Alright, dear,” Esperanza said, stopping him before the door.“What do you say we give him a proper scare?”

Keith grinned.“Okay.”

“He’s got the most adorable scream,” she sighed fondly.

“He really does.”

Carefully heading into the house, keeping Keith behind her, she edged them around the living room and towards the kitchen.Lance was there, singing and swaying his hips as he cooked something.Keith’s stomach dropped and his mouth went dry and he really desperately didn’t want to scare Lance anymore, because he really needed to kiss him senseless.Right now.

Esperanza gripped his wrist, opened a back door, shoved Keith out, and said, “Hide behind this wall.I’ll send Lance to check the temperature of the pool or something.I don’t know.I’ll figure it out.”Then she went back inside.

Doing as he was told, Keith waited, feeling kind of stupid, but knowing it would be worth it. 

About five minutes later, the back door swung open, and Lance stepped out, lifting his shirt up to wipe his face and sticking his hand in the pool.Keith thought about pushing him in the pool, but suspected Lance had his phone on him and that seemed too cruel.

Creeping up behind Lance slowly, Keith laid his hand on the back of Lance’s neck and whispered, “Boo.”

Lance screamed.From inside the house, uproarious laughter filtered out.Grinning, Keith stepped back so Lance didn’t hit him in the face with his flailing and waited for Lance to realize what exactly was happening.

It happened gradually.One second, Lance looked like he’d seen a ghost.In the next, he grinned, and in the next, tears started streaming silently down his face and he flung himself into Keith’s arms, pulling him in hard and tight.“Oh my god,” Lance said.“You’re here.You’re actually here.You are actually here, right?I’m not imagining this?”

“Been having hallucinations recently?” Keith asked.

“Kind of.I see you in the grocery store a lot.Or, well, what I think is you.”

“Happy birthday,” Keith whispered.

“It’s not my birthday yet.”

“Close enough.”

Stepping back, Lance cupped Keith’s face with a hand and sighed happily.“Good god, you’re like forty more times more beautiful than I remembered.”

“I have something else for you,” Keith said, digging around in his jean’s pocket.

“A kiss?Please tell me it’s a kiss because I really need to kiss you.”

“No, it’s…I mean, that’s fine, but no.”

Rolling back and forth on the balls of his feet, Lance said, “Well, hurry up, because I’m ready to make out with you for like four hours.If anybody minds, we’ll just hide in the pool and do it there.”

Pulling out a friendship bracelet he’d made—it had been a long, awful day and Pidge had said it would help him feel better—Keith took Lance’s hand and carefully tied it around his wrist.Then he lifted up his own arm and shoved down the sleeve of Lance’s jacket.“I’ve got a matching one.I just…I missed you a lot and I know it’s totally stupid, but I actually think it’ll help if I know you’ve got this.Or whatever.”

“You suck at making friendship bracelets.”

“Yeah.”

“I’ll have to make them next time,” Lance said.

“Okay.”

With a gentle hand, Lance lifted Keith’s face to his.“I love it.And I love you.And I’m like happier than I’ve ever been in my life, because you’re here, which is…kind of insane, to be honest, because you are definitely not the type who meets the family before you’re standing at the altar.”

Laughing softly, Keith ran his thumb over Lance’s left eyebrow.“I love you, too, McClain.”

“Can we kiss yet?” 

“Sure.”

Lance leaned in, captured Keith’s lips with his, and Keith felt restored, balanced, and at home in the middle of a desert, on the edge of a pool, far away from what he knew.


End file.
